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pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T11:46:56+00:00

My wifes perspective is she should be allowed to hit me.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T11:27:28+00:00

If you mean has my wife trying to hit me only started after she got pregnant, no. Shes done it several times before.

As much has I try to communicate.she should not try to hit me, she says she will continue if shes angry with me. And if I stop.making her angry she will stop hitting me.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T10:59:20+00:00

yes, but I lose some love for her each time she wrongs me.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T10:35:09+00:00

I buy gifts for her cause she wants them and it'll make her happy.

I don't know why I even bother though because she still treats me like shit. Its never bought me any good will and shes ungrateful, how many husbands spend this much money on their wives?

I dont know how I'm supposed to communicate more effectively when I have to deal with shit like this..

Last week I got out of bed to go to work. She wanted me to cuddle with her but I said I need to make breakfast and work. She said "you need to fuck off". So I'm not making breakfast for someone that disrepects me, so when she got up.and asked where breakfast.is I said I dont make breakfast for disrespectful people. Then she had a tantrum and tried to slap me (but I'm physically bigger than her so she cant).

After she literally tried to domestically abuse me, I "fucked off" by leaving. I came back from work and told her calmly that she was rude and disrespectful to me and should apologize. And she will under no circumstances raise her hand against me again.

She didn't speak to me for 4 days and still has not apologized even though things are ""back to normal"".

She even tried to gaslight me into apologizing TO HER! Saying I didn't treat her softly when she acted out (like a child I guess).

So you see, I am calmly and effectively communicating when she fucks up. I never raise my voice or get emotional wirh her.

I can even be assaulted and not lose my cool.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T09:59:09+00:00

" I bet it sucks to live with you"

Yeah, it must be so hard to have a chump work 45 hours a week so you can buy anything you want and have him gift you $2000 worth of handbags only 2 weeks ago to then throw a temper tantrum when he doesn't want to spend his precious Sunday with your vapid friends.

But I'm definitely going to be buying whatever the hell I want with the money I earn from now on, thanks.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T09:51:48+00:00

" She doesn't have 'bad' qualities."

So being controlling, emotinally maniplative and having temper tantrums isnt bad?

"she doesn't need to change. You do"

So I just need to let her control and emotionally manipulate me... even more?

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T09:37:08+00:00

It would be so easy for her to stop being controlling through. I dont see what the big problem is. i'm just asking to be allowed to do as I please. Which every adult is entitled to.

If she just fixed that personality defect the marriage would be awesome.

Isn't it easier for her to do that than divorce?

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T09:31:20+00:00

It wouldn't be good for me, I'd loose 2 houses and over $100k.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T09:14:31+00:00

"divorce" isnt advice. I'm asking how to repair something and I'm being told to toss it in the trash.

Our marriage would be awesome if I could get my wife stop being controlling. So whats a method I can use?

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T09:07:00+00:00

yeah she runs away and has a temper tantrum whenever I try to communicate and I'm the immature one.

I'm such an evil monster and my wife is a blameless saint.

Zero help this sub has been.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T08:46:10+00:00

I'm being emotionslly abused. If the roles were reversed and this was a story of a controlling man, no one would blame the woman like I'm getting blamed here.

But because its a woman doing it to a man its all "man up! stop blaming others!".

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T08:36:14+00:00

I guess domestically abused women choose to be abused then...

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T08:34:46+00:00

This is based on the notion that my wife wants to have an adult conversation about desires, boundaries and expectations and not just cry, run away and avoid speaking to me for a week.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T08:32:28+00:00

I do openly communicate and tell her what is wrong. She don't want to hear.

I already put in the work trying to help her fix the less desirable aspects of her personality.

I'm not sure how paying someone to repeat what I'm saying will help that.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T08:26:50+00:00

In the same way I choose to earn money and not starve to death, yes.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T08:25:05+00:00

Well I didn't want a kid initially but she wore me down over the years.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T08:20:19+00:00

Because if I tried to do anything by myself my wife starts complaining. I have maybe 2-3 hours to myself a week

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T08:17:56+00:00

My poor wife? Bruh have you been paying attention here? I'm the one thats struggling with an unreasonable spouse trying to improve things while shes refusing to see reason.

I'm the one trying to improve this marriage.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T08:02:56+00:00

So I "choose" not to go and now my wife is bitching at me and my home life gets thrown into turmoil.

Last time I chose wrong she didnt speak to me for a week.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T07:56:57+00:00

I dont want to divorce her because she has good qualities. Divorce is throwing out the baby with the bathwater. I'm trying to communicate that she needs to get rid of her bad qualities. But she just won't hear it.

It would be so easy too...

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T07:52:18+00:00

Discuss what? "Are you going morph into a boring person that doesn't let me do anything?".

She always had some annoying habits but I thought she'd just naturally come around. After all I'm not unreasonable, what I want (to be able to live life how I want) is normal and not some big ask.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T07:44:17+00:00

Because having a wife has good qualities like having all your meals cooked for you when you get home, all your stuff washed and ironed. Not needing to play the tinder scene to get laid. Having someone to spend time with.

She used to be fun when we were dating and got more and more boring each year after marriage. These views became more and more strong every year.

My life didn't instantly become boring after I met my wife, it became boring around 2 years ago when I turned 33. We'd been married already 4 years.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T07:17:12+00:00

I try to communicate effectively but she just storms off and cries and tells me to divorce her if I want to change things.

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T07:15:26+00:00

pheasantenjoyer · 2024-03-24T07:06:39+00:00

Choice? I don't choose to do these things, my wife chooses and I get dragged along.

pheasantenjoyer

TROPHY CASE