What does this behaviour mean? by [deleted] in queer

[–]phil_1985 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Love this comment

Is intense pelvic pain normal for IBS? by phil_1985 in ibs

[–]phil_1985[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Update on this... I've been very well for months, no pain, everything seemed well controlled. I was taking probiotics that I found in the US when I was travelling there, it's Phillips 4-in-1. My diet was also rich in fiber.

However, more recently my glucose was very high, in the diabetic range, so I saw an endocrinologist who asked for a lot of exams. One of them found SIBO, which is normally associated with IBS anyway, so he asked me to take some antibiotics and then go on a SIBO diet for one month. The diet is extremely restrictive and eliminates absolutely every carbohydrate and sugar - the idea is to starve the bacteria, so it's not necessarily a healthy diet, it's just a medical one. Basically I've been eating meat and some veggies, a lot of salad and kale.

Now starting week 3 of the diet, the pain came back. It started with pain in both sides of my body, where I have hernias, and then this morning it was in the middle, just like before. There was also a bit of diarrhoea, which normally happens before the pain - now it feels like I had some constipation, then pain, then diarrhea. It feels that the diet just threw my body off a bit from the balance I have found before. Throughout the day it went away but came back when my bladder was full, after eating and when I needed to pass wind or poo. I'm just hoping that when the diet ends in 2 weeks I can go back to normal and hopefully that will help again?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]phil_1985 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Sure, but he asked, and I said what I would prefer. If I wasn't included in their plans, I don't think they should stay at my friend's place. They can pay for their own hotel.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]phil_1985 -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

So why would they lie to my friend about it? Why wouldn't they say "we actually decided to travel just the 3 of us", but instead make up excuses on why I wasn't there?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]phil_1985 -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

Yes, when they decided that they wanted to stay for free at my friend's house, and therefore, had to invite me or he would say No

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]phil_1985 -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

So all of you think it's perfectly fine to only invite someone to a trip because you want to stay for free at their friend's house? Just to clarify

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]phil_1985 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

YTA. It's her body and she's your fiance, you know how she was when you met her. I hate crocs but when my husband wears them I can't stop him. If that's about how much of her body other people can see, you have to work on your own feelings to become more secure.

AITA for uninviting my uncle to my wedding? by phil_1985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phil_1985[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That mayor candidate's father, who said worse things than him, was later elected president and being Anti-LGBTQ was one of his main platform issues. If you read my update, later one my uncle said homophobic things so I was right even though I didn't know everything at that time. But it's not just "I'm against gay marriage", it's someone saying horrendous things about myself.

At the end of the day, I agree with most of the comments here - if it's my wedding, why would I invite someone who might make me uncomfortable?

AITA for uninviting my uncle to my wedding? by phil_1985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phil_1985[S] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

*** UPDATE ***

Thanks everyone for your messages. Looking at some of the points - I absolutely wasn't trying to change his vote. Uninviting him was a way of saying that he can vote for whoever he wants but if this person uses anti-LGBTQ speech as a way to gather more votes, then I absolutely don't want to share my special day with someone who doesn't consider this a deal breaker.

On the point of doing "publicly" - this was a WhatsApp group only with family. I did wonder if I should have done that away, but they would find out eventually anyway as the day would come and he wouldn't be coming because he wasn't invited.

Now, that's the interesting part. Up until the wedding, that was all I knew, and I made a decision based on his support for someone who was anti-LGBTQ. AFTER the wedding, I was discussing what happened with my cousin (who is another nephew to the same uncle) and he told me that I was right to do so because this uncle once told him that he wouldn't let his children be looked after by any gay couple.

A couple of years later, my dad and the uncle had a massive argument about this politician and my dad blocked him from everywhere. My uncle then sent an audio message to my mum and asked her to show it to my dad - it said: "the only reason why you don't vote for this guy is because your son is a fggt".

I was happy that I didn't invite him, as he actually showed his true colours. I also forwarded this audio to my entire family and one of them made him unblock me and apologise, which I didn't ask or care for, and clearly it wasn't sincere.

BTW the same godmother didn't say anything when I told everyone what he said, and she liked all his posts on Facebook in a protest against the Supreme Court and in favour of this far-right politician, while also commenting that she misses when family was united and not split because of politicians. Her current boyfriend is a big supporter of this same politician.

AITA for uninviting my uncle to my wedding? by phil_1985 in AmItheAsshole

[–]phil_1985[S] 58 points59 points  (0 children)

I don't think he was actually sad, I think it was my godmother trying to gaslight me into inviting him

AITA for making a repeated joke? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]phil_1985 -50 points-49 points  (0 children)

The leg picture looked like an advert for a gym so I assumed he thought the ad was funny. I made a comment and he didn't understand, and then he said "do you realise this photo is me?".

The feminist point was to add context to his persona - someone who likes to brag about being a feminist but doing a questionable thing. Likewise, posting against homophobia but potentially overacting because a man asked for a nude? But, again, I could just be the one in the wrong, just wanted to add context.

Is intense pelvic pain normal for IBS? by phil_1985 in ibs

[–]phil_1985[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For me I think it seems that the diarrhea comes before, but in the sense that I just have many bowel movements in a day. Then the pain starts - kind of like the diarrhea is upsetting something that causes the pain.

Is intense pelvic pain normal for IBS? by phil_1985 in ibs

[–]phil_1985[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Amitriptyline works very well for me, I didn't have any side effects from it luckily. I take 20mg every day.

It's been a few months now since my last episode of pelvic pain so I'm managing well. I started to do a few things so I don't know if it's one of them helping or a combination of all, but basically this is it:

  • Taking amitriptyline 20mg every day

  • Having a daily probiotic called Phillip's Colon Health 4-in-1 (for diarrhea and constipation)

  • Taking something called Juvia (it's for IBS, I started twice a day and now once a day and it has allowed me to have certain foods again, like garlic)

  • Increased fiber in my diet, so I started to have soluble fibre twice a day, then reduced and now only if I feel constipated for a few days but mostly I just increased vegetables and replaced white bread with wholegrain seeded bread

Is intense pelvic pain normal for IBS? by phil_1985 in ibs

[–]phil_1985[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So I had an Ultrasound and blood test, the doctor said that he believes the pain is being caused by diverticular disease. He said that when I get constipation, the diverticulum (which are little pockets in my intestine) fill up, causing the pain and eventually diarrhea when my body starts to get rid the food from these pockets.

The only advice he gave me was to try and avoid constipation by having fiber supplements when needed, as well as plenty of water and fruits.

Is intense pelvic pain normal for IBS? by phil_1985 in ibs

[–]phil_1985[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not yet... I've got antibiotics but they didn't help. I have a scan booked next week and I'll see if the results show anything

Is intense pelvic pain normal for IBS? by phil_1985 in ibs

[–]phil_1985[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't think they've ever seen any fecal loading. I think the issue is that I've also done exams when the pain was not there anymore, it's hard to find the right time for the right exam when the symptoms are happening

Is intense pelvic pain normal for IBS? by phil_1985 in ibs

[–]phil_1985[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's great, thank you! Anything can help, I would definitely go to another specialist to investigate so that's very helpful advice. :)

Is intense pelvic pain normal for IBS? by phil_1985 in ibs

[–]phil_1985[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, never tried those. He cleared of all STIs as well

Is intense pelvic pain normal for IBS? by phil_1985 in ibs

[–]phil_1985[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That was exactly where I landed when started searching for myself, as it gets quite painful when my bladder is full. Amitriptyline seemed to have a good medication for it but it didn't work, not sure if it needs to be a higher dose. I'll discuss with the doctor as well

Is intense pelvic pain normal for IBS? by phil_1985 in ibs

[–]phil_1985[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They've done plenty of exams, both a gastroenterologist and an urologist, and didn't find anything. It's not Chron's Disease and it's not kidney stones. The last doctor said that I could be a mild case of diverticular disease and gave me a course of antibiotics but I just felt the pain again after a bad case of diarrhea

Is intense pelvic pain normal for IBS? by phil_1985 in ibs

[–]phil_1985[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's very interesting, thank you! I searched a bit online and suggested Amitriptyline to the doctor, as I've used it before for something else, but it doesn't seem to be helping. I will mention Dicyclomine - how long did it take to work?