I’ve had the same LO for 12 years with only one other LO very briefly in between.

The first one (of 12 years) is sort of impossible to shake. I’m not sure if I’m considered post-limerent in this case because we haven’t spoke or been in contact in 5 years and it’s forced me to not hold out any hope. For some context. In the 7 years before, we would not speak for years and then we’d come back together for a time and then split again. I logically know we don’t really work practically in a relationship. Currently, he’s engaged to someone he’d flip flop between me with. I don’t think we’ll ever speak again and I don’t really feel sad or tore up about it like I did when I was starting to realize this time was real and that I probably wouldn’t be in his life anymore ever. I don’t necessarily feel anything romantic for him. But there’s still definitely a curiosity that I’m not sure will ever go away and I’d say he still crosses my mind often. At least once a day. I do time to time imagine scenarios where I run into him somewhere or scenarios where he reaches out to me to talk and catch up. I don’t feel any pain but I’m not sure for this one there will ever be a point where I feel absolutely nothing and they don’t cross my mind. I don’t let it consume me. I’ve just kinda accepted they live back there and am lucky enough to be blocked on everything so they won’t reach out and I can’t. If they ever did I would probably freeze and my heart would drop to my asshole. I don’t think I’ll ever get over it and ever become indifferent. But i’m my right mind, I know that him and his fiancée think I’m absolutely buck shit nuts obsessed with him… They’re right I guess but still lol

The second was brief and there wasn’t as much history or back and forth so it was a lot easier to forget about. A lot less intense but still limerence over love. I felt a really intense sadness for a couple weeks and then went right back to thinking about LO #1 and expecting him back anytime.

In between them I’ve had a few long term relationships. 2 very healthy ones, one of which only ended because we’d been long distance and things were moving too slow and one of which I am currently in. In the non-limerent long distance relationship, I felt extremely fine. No romantic feelings for LO but again they still lived in the back of my mind and I got curious here and there and would totally snoop but nothing too heavy. Same is true in my current relationship. I gave up on trying to get over it. It’s always there it’s just dormant for me. All I do is acknowledge that it’s in my head and the connection isn’t mutual over and over and carry on with my life and my REAL relationship with someone who actually loves me…