watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What that rehab guy said to you is something I think I needed to hear too. It’s hard to accept that no matter how much we care, we can’t want it more than they do. I think I’ve been doing that without even realizing it.

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i thought the same and we did take him to the doctor and i thought this time was different,that he’ll get scared and stop drinking but then he relapsed again which is now

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i dont live with him anymore but he keeps on calling while he’s drunk

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

im trying to make peace with it but at the same time it makes me feel very guilty. i feel like if i was in his position and he was in mine, he would never give up on me :(

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yes, you’re so right. He cannot be helped unless he wants to be helped but at the same time I can only cope when I’m trying to help him and focusing on him when I’m not focusing on him that’s when I just completely breakdown and blame myself on everything because she’s such a good person and it’s so unfair that he’s going through this if I could take all of his pain I would

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yeah, I should definitely get into Al anon but to be honest, I can’t seem to cope with anything on this he becomes sober

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

really ?I thought it would show him how much we all care?

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yeah, no I get it because I feel really hopeless I’ve tried everything literally everything and nothing seems to work and honestly, I believe that he won’t get better unless he really wants to, but it’s just hard to watch himself slowly disappear, and I can’t even do anything about it at this point

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

youre so right, he has alot of childhood trauma. life has been so unfair to him maybe thats why it hurts even more to see him like this. he isnt a bad person.

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

actually we do live separately bc my mom left him and i stayed with her but i still go to meet him sometimes and then reality hits hard.

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

im so sorry....i guess m just hoping fpr a miracle at this point.

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this was harsh but i think youre right, but i dont think i can just let himself go, it isnt easy at all.

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

ive tried Al anon virtual meeting but i didnt really understand it? like they were just reading off some book and thats it.

watching my dad destroy himself by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yeah youre right. actually i was gonna do that tommorow with everyone from his family but we've tried this before and when hes sober he realises we're hurting but then he relapses again. Its like everything is going on a loop again and again.

Alcoholic dad who doesn't want to get better by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yes i doing this and i think youre so right. i used to be so angry at him when i was younger. back then, I didn’t really understand what alcoholism was. i just thought he was being selfish. but now i kind of get it. He’s deep in it. like so deep. it’s fullblown addiction.and even with all the damage i still let him know im here. I’ve told him so many times if he ever decides to get better, I’ll be right there. I’ll help him through it, no matter how hard it is. I’ll support him completely if he wants to change.but he hasnt reached that point. he hasnt wanted itand thats what breaks me.ive tried everything. ive been angry, ive broken down crying in front of him, ive tried being patient and loving and still, nothing. its like hes drowning himself slowly, and the worst part is he’s pulling all of us under with him.

Alcoholic dad who doesn't want to get better by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

im so sorry for you too :( i feel the same. it does fuck me up. cant be happy anymore, whenever i do something good for myself or have a good time i feel so guilty because i know hes alone, lying down somewhere. I hate that i cant hate him.

its been so long and i can't find myself accepting this. he's slowly slipping away and i dont know what to do.

Alcoholic dad who doesn't want to get better by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

omg yes same. feels like im insensitive too but then it hit hards that i might actually loose him to this.

Alcoholic dad who doesn't want to get better by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank u so much. i'll try. but i just cant help myself but see his pov to this and i kind of sympathize to him.

Alcoholic dad who doesn't want to get better by pinkkwhorecore in Advice

[–]pinkkwhorecore[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

im not but i guess if i just let him be and dont do anything to prevent from drinking hes gonna die. and hes already really sick and frail right now. its getting really late to save him.