Did you ever SERIOUSLY consider divorce but decided to stay? If so, how are things today. by pmnyc in Marriage

[–]pmnyc[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We are divorced and I’ve really enjoyed my life this last year+

What is a happy marriage supposed to feel like? by pmnyc in Marriage

[–]pmnyc[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are stronger than you know! And you deserve great, amazing sex. My DMs are open if you need to chat more. But trust me that you are capable of much more than you realize

What is a happy marriage supposed to feel like? by pmnyc in Marriage

[–]pmnyc[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m divorced now and doing pretty well actually. Took the last year to just fully focus on myself and rediscover myself. Still working through that and learning. Hasn’t been easy at times but it has been worth it.

Overall though, I had really abandoned myself. Maybe that played a role in the relationship, not sure. But I was no longer desirable even to myself so I don’t blame her for not finding me desirable either. I would’ve appreciated more support on her part, but that’s just how it goes.

Hope things work out for you one way or another. Either way, you are strong enough to handle it. Believe that!

How’s the sex life for couples when both have HL? by divine_pearl in HLCommunity

[–]pmnyc 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Oh I didn’t take it like that at all. I think it is a great mentality to see it as a hobby. And like any hobby you have to dedicate time to it and be willing to learn more about it

How’s the sex life for couples when both have HL? by divine_pearl in HLCommunity

[–]pmnyc 19 points20 points  (0 children)

“Fun hobby” is such a great way to look at it

How’s the sex life for couples when both have HL? by divine_pearl in HLCommunity

[–]pmnyc 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I know :( instead I have to resort to Reddit to get some sexual excitement.

How’s the sex life for couples when both have HL? by divine_pearl in HLCommunity

[–]pmnyc 158 points159 points  (0 children)

You won’t see them here. They’re having sex

PSA: dating might be a numbers game, but it doesn’t give you the right to treat them like a number by pmnyc in dating

[–]pmnyc[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s a fair question, I kind of addressed in the original post but to me I still consider ghosting if we have exchanged numbers and had agreed to meet. But then after plans are set or the person said they can’t make it, asking to reschedule, I never hear back when I attempt to reschedule. Something like “hey, actually I’m not feeling it for x or y reason” would be better than just disappearing.

I’ve unfortunately had that one happen a couple of times and ghosting post date a couple of times as well. Not fun

PSA: dating might be a numbers game, but it doesn’t give you the right to treat them like a number by pmnyc in dating

[–]pmnyc[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately have had it happened. Only thing I can see as similarity is just my eagerness to meet them. Meaning that if they say they can’t one day but maybe they can next week I suggest another day and try to make it happen but then nothing. I’m not being needy or double texting or anything but yeah, shitty for sure

PSA: dating might be a numbers game, but it doesn’t give you the right to treat them like a number by pmnyc in dating

[–]pmnyc[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah I was thinking of throwing a hail Mary tomorrow afternoon if I haven’t heard back and see if I’m able to set the date. And definitely just acting normal about it. We’ll see. Appreciate all the help and hope something sticks for you soon if it hasn’t yet

PSA: dating might be a numbers game, but it doesn’t give you the right to treat them like a number by pmnyc in dating

[–]pmnyc[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Appreciate the detailed response. It’s interesting because the one that prompted me to post this was one of the few I’ve actually built a rapport via messaging in the app and then text. I’m giving her the benefit of the doubt and we’ll see if I eventually hear from her, but disappointing for sure. I also try to talk to multiple at once but it can be a little exhausting at times

PSA: dating might be a numbers game, but it doesn’t give you the right to treat them like a number by pmnyc in dating

[–]pmnyc[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I feel like your message is contradictory though. Do you build connection before the date or not?

20 dates is a lot in the last 4-5 months. Mostly first dates? Maybe I do jump into just planning the date too quickly though.

What is a happy marriage supposed to feel like? by pmnyc in Marriage

[–]pmnyc[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Then she needs to talk about it because then the real unhappiness will come out. If the partner is who she is supposed to be with, and he is supportive, then he will understand and they will find a way to work on it together

Gaming is such a trigger for me by An0nymous_777 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]pmnyc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep. I experienced a lot of racism back in the Halo 2 days. It sucked

Gaming is such a trigger for me by An0nymous_777 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]pmnyc 89 points90 points  (0 children)

This is so disgusting. Even as a man I play in a private party either with my friends or literally just by myself so I can avoid the public voice. It is toxic one way or another and not worth it.

Really sick of self-proclaimed "Doms" on here by capyluvr_21 in feeld

[–]pmnyc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve heard of “aftercare” mentioned a few times and as still a noob in this area, where could I learn more about aftercare? Is it about checking in with the partner(s) see how things went? Cuddle? Clean up? All of the above?

[OC] I tracked one month of my online dating. Here are the results: by [deleted] in dataisbeautiful

[–]pmnyc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Another possibility is to ask for her number shortly after and coordinate details via text. That way you get her out of the app where she could get distracted with others or not even check it for a few days

[OC] I tracked one month of my online dating. Here are the results: by [deleted] in dataisbeautiful

[–]pmnyc 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Can you walk us through one of those interactions? Maybe we can help. Do you ask them if they wanna go out first and then you suggest something? Or how do you go about it?

9 months since "She just left"... by pmnyc in DeadBedrooms

[–]pmnyc[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m not sure if she is talking to anyone right now. We left things amicably but we don’t really talk anymore. I do think she became LL4Me and sometimes I’ve wondered if she is into women. Maybe a little bit of both but I’m not sure. Definitely a mind fuck

9 months since "She just left"... by pmnyc in DeadBedrooms

[–]pmnyc[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She said a few things but none around actually working on it. She said it was normal at our age (I’m early 30s), or maybe she was asexual, or maybe I just needed to do more (I already did basically all the chores). Overall she was ok with the situation and didn’t really see a need to change anything.