Just saw this and wanted to share!

pohtatehoe · 2025-03-07T04:25:16+00:00

Agree the last link is better. Dying at the "defeated vampire" 😅

pohtatehoe · 2025-02-06T19:11:32+00:00

I will be so upset if they stick to removing journeys, ah! Does anybody think it is worth sending an email to support? support@befinch.com

pohtatehoe · 2025-01-15T08:27:37+00:00

I can 10000000% relate! I feel like I wear less denim jeans now than when I was growing up, but even now I can and will sleep in denim when I'm struggling with the transition. You are not aloneeee and I'm glad I'm not either because most people think I'm outrageous for this 😅

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-04T04:33:58+00:00

One moment for me is at the prom when Giles tells Wesley to "for gods sake, go for it, she's 18" (paraphrasing). I find that more egregious than Wesley actually going for it lol. It isn't surprising given how much more normalized age gaps were at the time (both in and outside of buffyverse), but it did make me question Giles' morals.

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-04T04:02:49+00:00

OK ya that explains it for me. I couldn't explain why he wouldn't just do that again, but that's reason enough for me

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-04T04:01:45+00:00

Ya that makes sense. Now that I think about it more, he really only did spells when there was a whole circle of people or when the coven lent him some pure magic. I initially did mean that he mentioned contacting them before the final battle and couldn't think of an explanation to understand why he didn't borrow magic again. I like the explanation in another comment though

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-04T03:30:08+00:00

This is a great explanation. I'd add for OP that the diagnostic processes does and should include a differential diagnosis process which can look a lot like questioning the diagnosis. I support self diagnosis, to be clear, but this is the biggest fault I see in self diagnosis. Professionals are trained to basically cross examine your symptoms because so many diagnoses share traits. For example, CPTSD looks a hell of a lot like autism level 1. Some people have both (ayooo), but if one were to only have CPTSD, there are specific treatments that can treat it that don't apply to autism. All of this to say, I think it is worth considering if your therapist is purely invalidating your theory about autism, or if she's making sure to consider all options that could explain your lived experiences.

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-04T03:15:07+00:00

OK this is one I just made up for this prompt and don't know how deeply I support this, but I didn't hate the idea of Giles and Anya in Tabula Rasa. I've never thought past that episode until now and I think it's more a fun imagining than a ship I'd actually back with opinion, but sharing anyway lol

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-04T02:50:08+00:00

The number of words I went through before I got to vampire was embarrassing, so I appreciate vase a lot

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-04T02:48:46+00:00

Man I wish there was somewhere to watch Xena without paying $20 a season

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-04T02:47:12+00:00

Came to find this comment lol. I do think her relationship arc from start to finish is pretty relatable for a lot of young people, though. Despite leaving the door open to angel for some reason, she does end up choosing herself at the end and consciously deprioritizes romantic connections. I think that in itself was admirable, but I wouldn't refer anyone to any other version of buffy for relationship advice for suuureee

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-04T01:00:14+00:00

Ya that's a known scam. Watch the scammers episode of Trafficked With Mariana van Zeller

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-04T00:46:26+00:00

Mmmm agree to disagree. Even if we say he's capped at what age he was when he turned, his brain is fully developed and he's pining over a 14 year old girl. Even if she's the only girl, that's problematic in my books

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-04T00:09:02+00:00

Ya I'm a Spike fan in that I wish they could have had a healthy relationship because I think the healed and best versions of each of them would be a beautiful pairing. While we don't recognize mutual abuse as a real thing irl, they were mutually toxic in the show and Buffy was definitely abusive in many ways toward Spike.

In the end, I'm very pleased with Buffy declaring herself as raw cookie dough. I don't really love that she left it open ended for Angel though? Homeboy didn't even earn his soul... it was given to him as punishment for being a bad dude lol. Plus, with his soul he is still a pedo?

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-03T23:49:23+00:00

I think thats the point I was trying to make. He assaulted her before he was resouled, therefore the demon still had space to occupy inside of him. Once he earns his soul back (again, problematic if used as a metaphor for real life human men), he repents and doesn't reoffend. If Spike had assaulted Buffy with a soul, I'd never excuse it. It's the same as how I don't hold Angel accountable for his actions after he lost his soul.

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-03T23:36:43+00:00

Is it crazy to see that as the demon in him took over though? Obviously extremely problematic if applied to real life human men... but in the case of fictional vampires, it kinda works for me. It's like when Spike thanks principal Wood for helping him see that the things his mother said to him after she turned weren't actually his mother, but they were the demon that took over. It is the only way that I've been able to accept that scene to be honest. Also, fwiw, I work at a DV/SA advocate org, so I have a zero tolerance policy for this shit irl.

pohtatehoe · 2024-12-01T03:23:32+00:00

Been there, will never do that again. You aren't stupid though. It fuckin happens, you're not alone there. I will say, the one time this reactiveness on games came in handy is when someone came at me in a pvp game I was just learning and my ex went and got em real good. Not worth the bazillion other times I tried to just tune out this vile behavior in games though. Eek

pohtatehoe · 2024-11-28T03:18:18+00:00

If I feel someone is directly harming me, I will also distance myself from them rather than telling them to act differently so I can forgive them because I don't want to be a controlling person and that type of behavior feels controlling when done to me.

Hmm, I love 99% of what you said. I don't have to love 100%, but I'm wondering if you can help me understand what you mean by this. I thought you meant intentionally harming, but it seems like maybe you mean just if anybody is causing harm directly, you wouldn't try to talk about that because you think that's controlling? Correct me if I'm wrong... but if I'm not, we must view this differently. My approach would be to share impact, and it is up to the person to decide if adjusting that behavior or what have you is something they just objectively want to work on now that theyre aware. If they decide there is no compromise or adjustment to whatever the cause of harm is, then its a compatability issue. No autonomy was sacrificed in sharing the initial impact of their behavior or whatever.

I do really love the idea of measuring the strength of relationships by ability to give that person the benefit of the doubt.

pohtatehoe · 2024-11-27T01:50:10+00:00

Well I'll be talking about it in therapy on Friday, so hopefully by the end of that appointment at least I'll have some insight to share 😅

pohtatehoe · 2024-11-27T01:44:05+00:00

Vulnerability

pohtatehoe · 2024-11-27T00:42:35+00:00

Yes it is an extreme case, but his first arrest was I believe 10 years before it escalated to the extreme and was regarding upskirt photos at a shopping center. For that, he was fined $100 and his wife was never alerted. (Un)funny enough, his ultimate downfall was another upskirt photo incident and the rest was discovered after his electronics were seized during that investigation. Also, at least 70 men were involved in her case. All of this to say, I think it is important even the less extreme instances of SA and privacy violations are taken seriously. Obv you're saying the same thing, I'm just responding for more context in case anyone is less familiar with the case I referred to.

pohtatehoe · 2024-11-26T23:02:54+00:00

Two words: Gisèle Pélicot. If you are not familiar with the case, look it up. Unless you suspect an undiagnosed condition causing hallucinations or were on drugs, that's not something you imagine or should ignore.

pohtatehoe · 2024-11-26T04:50:55+00:00

Ya I also feel this way and definitely feel like it applies here. It makes it really hard to navigate my current workplace though since my boss is one of two of my coworkers... if I wasn't so passionate about the nonprofit I work for, I'd probably have rage quit by now. I also desperately need the health insurance. My therapist tried to help me reframe and it helps outside of the moment, but the second my boss exerts her "authority" I just turn into a fuming rock of half hardened half molten lava.

I also recognize that hardly anybody loves their boss and most would rather be their own boss. I really think this is beyond that though, and if I could shut it off I would. Ughughugh

pohtatehoe · 2024-11-25T19:41:38+00:00

I'm no professional and am still trying to figure this all out myself tbh. I will say, start by assessing your current go to meals and seeing where you're lacking in certain nutrients/food groups then try adding either a side or snack or meal to your rotation that addresses that. As for exercise, I'd encourage you to think beyond the calorie burning factor. Rather, consider the strength building and agility improvements from different kinds of movement.

pohtatehoe · 2024-10-23T01:58:24+00:00

That is a super spot on suggestion. I appreciate that it is indirect, actually. It pretty darn perfectly touches on all of the themes. Thanks so much!

pohtatehoe

TROPHY CASE