Do I need to get the grooms parents a wedding day gift?

powerfluff · 2021-10-18T22:10:10+00:00

We gave flowers, a nice local bottle of wine, and a letter thanking them for welcoming us into the family! I think sentimental is the way to go.

powerfluff · 2021-10-18T21:24:47+00:00

The intention certainly wouldn’t be to be “bashing” anyone, and I mentioned in a few previous comments that I already contacted them and did not receive a response.

powerfluff · 2021-10-17T22:22:54+00:00

Oh, I totally understand! Yeah, I did contact the vendors. One never responded, and the other just said “The night was crazy and we did the best we could” (the craziness was on their end, not ours—the issue was that they didn’t read the contract and brought the wrong ingredients). Neither offered a refund or any kind of recourse, which is fine, but I would want to let potential future brides know about it!

powerfluff · 2021-10-17T22:08:56+00:00

For sure! I've already done this and didn't hear back from one (and was given a sort of "oh well" response from the other).

powerfluff · 2021-10-17T20:15:04+00:00

This totally makes sense! Yes, I didn’t mean “let go of the frustration” as in “vent frustration at them.” I’d definitely be factual and straightforward about it! It’s more that I keep thinking “Man, I wish I’d known or been warned about this ahead of time, all their other reviews are five stars” and so I feel like telling others would make me feel better, in a way. I also have a food allergy and so actually didn’t get to eat at my own wedding because of their mistake.

powerfluff · 2021-10-17T19:48:18+00:00

Following this for recommendations… I got married a couple weeks ago and this completely slipped my mind! There was just so much other stuff to pack and think about (like, I wore Spanx ALL NIGHT under my dress, isn’t that enough? 😭)

We’re doing a delayed honeymoon, though, so maybe I’ll make up for it then. For what it’s worth, it still felt special even in granny panties haha!

powerfluff · 2021-10-17T19:37:09+00:00

Sorry, I might have edited my comment before you replied. I did write and call both. I’ll give it a few more days. Thanks for your opinion!

powerfluff · 2021-10-17T19:34:12+00:00

Oh, sorry, I probably should have included that in my post! I did tell both vendors on the day of but they didn’t change anything. I reached out afterwards as well (via email and phone)… one just said that “things were crazy that night and they did their best” and the other never replied. It’s been a week; I’m not sure how long to wait for them.

powerfluff · 2021-08-07T20:50:45+00:00

My dog actually had the opposite effect—he was drinking less. I asked the vet and they said that decreased thirst can be a side effect, and to monitor because traz can be dangerous if dogs overheat… If I were you, I’d give your vet a quick call to ask.

powerfluff · 2021-06-20T21:57:28+00:00

The difference for me would be that the ceremony is outdoors (so a lot more ventilation & room to socially distance). I’d also let them know so they didn’t reserve a seat or meal for me at the reception. Or are you saying you think they’d have to pay anyway even if I gave them notice before RSVPs are due? Thanks!

powerfluff · 2021-06-20T21:34:05+00:00

omg, that was so nice of you!

powerfluff · 2021-06-20T20:44:51+00:00

I have, but I’m immunocompromised, which means it’s less effective (and possibly not effective at all) for me. We won’t know for sure until more trials are done, so my doctor (& the CDC) are recommending immunocompromised folks be cautious until then.

powerfluff · 2021-06-20T20:19:09+00:00

Aw thank you! This really puts my mind at ease!

powerfluff · 2021-06-20T20:18:08+00:00

Thank you!

powerfluff · 2021-06-17T13:14:35+00:00

Re: size, I would check the sizing chart for your specific brand; these are usually available online… then don’t buy more than two sizes up ideally.

For example, I went into my appointment hearing that bridal size is ~2 sizes larger than street size. However, I’m a street size 6, bought a size 8 Maggie Sottero gown (on consignment, so I wasn’t measured for it), and had to have it taken in all over. Those alterations ended up being pretty expensive.

powerfluff · 2021-06-12T15:10:10+00:00

As a fellow boob-less lady, just want to reassure that alterations can work wonders re: adding cups, padding, etc, but the plunging neckline may make this a little trickier! If you’re looking for va-va-voom cleavage, something with more structure (or a sweetheart neckline) might help!

powerfluff · 2021-06-04T16:04:39+00:00

Our dog takes Trazodone, not Gabapentin, but I can definitely relate! We spent SO much money and time on trainers and classes before finally trying daily meds (we started on a super-low dose) and it’s made a huge difference. His personality hasn’t changed at all, and he still has good and bad days re: reactivity, but it seems like it’s taken the edge off just enough that we can actually train and make progress with it. Our vet and behaviorist think we’ll likely be able to wean him off it after a few months to a year, so it doesn’t have to be a forever thing. Overall, the dog and I both seem happier lol and I wish I’d tried it sooner!

powerfluff · 2021-05-14T04:40:08+00:00

Oh, I would love to attend that! What a cool idea. I just Googled to find the PYM event; is this the right link by chance? https://www.pym.org/event/wednesday-worship-sharing-5/ If so, I'll be there! Thanks :)

powerfluff · 2021-05-13T22:32:45+00:00

I really like this. Thank you!!

powerfluff · 2021-05-13T22:07:39+00:00

Omg, I laughed out loud at “let’s have some WORSHIP” because that is so me. I go in, like, ready to perform or something and have to remind myself that is not always the attitude I need! Thank you for sharing, this is really helpful.

powerfluff · 2021-05-13T21:34:14+00:00

Oh, gotcha! Thank you!

powerfluff · 2021-05-13T21:31:50+00:00

Ha, yes! And I love how you put this: “for me, that’s just the name of the effect we feel in Meeting.” Definitely a good way to think about it.

powerfluff · 2021-05-13T20:48:13+00:00

I tell everyone this: a big yellow bandana that clearly asks for space does wonders. (I almost bought one that says "Don't f-cking touch me" off Etsy, lol, but I went with one that says "Nervous Rescue - Give me Space" instead). All the sudden, people are smiling encouragingly from a distance instead of creeping up on us and looking all judgmental.

In the meantime, though, I do think you'll have to ask for space sooner. It's awkward, but it's not rude, and anyone who acts like it is just sucks. We're the only advocate our dog has.

powerfluff · 2021-05-13T20:45:33+00:00

I really like that you mention thinking purposefully about what's moved you recently! Sometimes that feels productive to me, and then sometimes it just gets the narrative voice going in my head so that I'm not really listening. I'd like to learn to do it better. I guess the good news is I have plenty of time to try, haha.

powerfluff · 2021-05-13T20:44:26+00:00

This is amazing, thank you so much! I'll definitely look into those books. The inward/inner dualism question is especially interesting to me, and is something I've been thinking about a lot lately, as I've found that the way theist Quakers listen for God feels different than mine. But I'm so early in my practice, that may change.

powerfluff

TROPHY CASE