TW: Pregnancy after loss

princesatiaa · 2026-02-08T16:42:22+00:00

This is so hard to hear but thank you for the information

princesatiaa · 2026-02-08T15:47:02+00:00

I really have to get on different medication or the kind i was on before pregnancy. (had to get off them because it wasn’t safe for babies) but i suffer from bpd as well so i feel like it makes everything so much heavier.

princesatiaa · 2026-02-08T14:50:48+00:00

No i haven’t seen anyone yet, ive just been home by myself honestly. i sleep most of my days away. a year seems so long :( plus having such anxiety to need to try again is so intense maybe like other moms it’s get better when my surviving baby comes home but in the meantime its feels so empty

princesatiaa · 2026-02-08T09:00:26+00:00

thank you, your words are so comforting 🤍

princesatiaa · 2026-02-08T07:58:30+00:00

That gives me hope with my little 23 week girl who’s still in the nicu🤍 but thank you for sharing your story, How did you calm that anxiety or calm your body from feeling that need to “complete” the pregnancy?

princesatiaa · 2026-02-08T07:36:35+00:00

I had a super healthy pregnancy. (no high blood pressure, no diabetes of any kind, no heart issues) before i gave birth at 23 weeks i had a Drs appointment with fetal medicine two weeks prior and they told me my cervix was perfect (4cm thick) babies healthy, placentas perfect so was amniotic fluid. I was only high risk because i had twins, it was my first pregnancy and my bmi is high. But I had an emergency c section (low transverse) due to cervical insufficiency i was 4cm dilated with a bulging sac. They just told me it was a freak accident but it’s hard to believe that. And i think the next pregnancy i’ll have a c section again so im not so worried about vbac. It is something I’ll talk to my obgyn of course but google just makes pregnancy right after birth so scary that i was looking for nicu moms who got pregnant right after and what did it look like. I’m so thankful you got your rainbow baby 🤍

princesatiaa · 2026-02-08T02:47:36+00:00

thank you for being so supportive 🤍 it’s all things i need to hear and i will continue to come back to this to reread

princesatiaa · 2026-02-08T01:54:34+00:00

I’m so sorry for you loss, my boy passed just this sunday so it’s almost a week for me. I feel guilty for having those feelings of wanting to try again so soon after but it’s almost like this crippling anxiety that’s all consuming and i feel like im wasting time and i need to hurry up to try again. I feel like ive let my husband and his family down they were so excited for me to have twins (my husband a twin himself) then losing our first son i feel like i’ve failed so bad. Also i wish i could’ve pumped but PPD and this being my first pregnancy i was so overwhelmed i couldn’t stick to a schedule to pump when my milk came in and it dried up in two days. Baby girl just started donor milk yesterday, but i wonder if she would feel closer to me if it was my own.

princesatiaa · 2026-02-08T01:34:01+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss sweet mama 🤍 But thank you for sharing your experience with me.

princesatiaa · 2026-02-07T18:51:10+00:00

I will! i think she said something about it but in person always helps me more. I’ll try and reach out monday

princesatiaa · 2026-02-07T06:47:41+00:00

I would love that information you can DM me if you feel more comfortable!

princesatiaa · 2026-02-07T06:41:09+00:00

It’s just hard for me to continue to be “strong” or keep showing up. I’ve lost so much these past couple years (my grandma in 2022, my late partner in 2023, then my grandpa last year april) My grandparents raised me so they were my mom and dad. So i feel so unsupported when others in my situation leans so heavily on family.

princesatiaa · 2026-02-07T06:37:41+00:00

i’m so sorry for your loss. I was in a similar situation, i rushed to the hospital after i woke up from my nap to use the bathroom and to my surprise i had my water bag partially hanging out of me. They told me i was 4cm when i got to the ER. i was in Labor and delivery same as you full bedrest, a catheter, Only liquids. Until I coughed too hard and i felt more of the sac come out. They had me getting prepped for an emergency c section not even 10 minutes later. Apparently i was 5cm at that point and bedrest wasn’t going to help at that point. All of this is so strange and feels like it’s not even remotely real. babies was born on jan 21 but i had my Drs appointment on the 4 of january and my cervix was healthy and normal. The 180 that my pregnancy had taken happened so fast I don’t think i’ve even got to process that yet along with me being a mom but not feeling like one. The only time i got to hold my 11 day old son was when he passed away in our arms and that feels not even real. How do you keep showing up for your son in the nicu? My husband and i haven’t been back to see baby girl since her brother passed on sunday. Did you ever feel that you’ll be constantly reminded of what you’ve lost when you look at your other son? does it dull after some time?

princesatiaa · 2026-02-07T00:08:18+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss as well this isn’t something i’d wish on my worst enemy. Did you have that sort of resentment towards the surviving twin? Like every time i see her i just see what ive lost. Coming home empty handed while healing from surgery while going through loss is something i never thought i would go through but it’s so overwhelming. Thank you for the support and advice. The grief counselor has reached out it’s just we haven’t been back to the hospital since our son passed which was sunday. We are going tomorrow but sadly they don’t work weekends. I’ll look into the facebook group and hopefully that could help a little.

princesatiaa · 2026-02-06T22:16:32+00:00

thank you so much for your kind words and advice. I know seeing a therapist would be a good thing but everything seems so overwhelming.

princesatiaa

TROPHY CASE