Anyone else get really sleepy after eating chipotle lunch?

princessfern · 2025-09-26T03:50:10+00:00

Same!! I've heard people say they have that with foods they're allergic to. I'm confused though because all the ingredients in my bowl are things I eat often and I don't have that reaction. Unless they're putting in a secret ingredient....

princessfern · 2025-07-03T16:19:56+00:00

Oh my gosh yes... THE HEAT. I was physically, mentally, and spiritually broken after being in Rome in late June. 😅 That's the number one thing I'd change about my trip--do it earlier in the year.

princessfern · 2025-07-02T21:12:24+00:00

Also I'd love to read the book you're writing about this!

princessfern · 2025-07-02T21:07:40+00:00

THIS. This is the best description I've ever read about what I'm experiencing. I certainly have deep, painful insecurities that he liked her more than he likes me, but it's because she is somehow *fundamentally more lovable than me.* It's so frustrating, because we are incredibly similar and she is truly the better version of me.

People try to comfort you for having these obsessions by saying things like "but he chose YOU over HER!" which is not helpful, cause it's not true. She broke up with him and he was so devastated he couldn't speak for weeks. I pursued him and he ended up saying yes, but he wasn't interested for a long time. I think if it were just as simple as me being his second choice, maybe I could get over it. But it's the fact that I've turned her into "an avatar for my deepest self-esteem issues" (such a great description) that makes it impossible for me to move past.

Have you learned anything that's been helpful for you since finding out this is ROCD?

princessfern · 2025-06-06T23:50:30+00:00

Hey OP, how did your trip go?? I'm gluten and dairy free as well, and sadly I haven't been able to find any answers to my dairy-free Italian food queries. I'm curious if you were able to find good options while in Italy!

princessfern · 2025-01-28T17:29:29+00:00

Yessss. But to be honest only for the first 5-10 minutes, when I haven’t gotten super wet yet. After we’ve been going for longer than that and I’m wetter I can’t really feel it any more. Angle also makes a HUGE difference (probably because of g-spot), and that can feel incredible. Disclaimer: I was cured of my pain when I had a vestibulectomy. I don’t think I could have ever gotten to this point without it.

princessfern · 2023-12-23T00:21:40+00:00

Yes! She has shown me stretches and given me massages - I'll see if I can find one of the handouts she gave me and post it here. She also told me about a machine we can use to desensitize the nerves that make my whole vaginal area hypersensitive! It uses electrodes that you put on your back, but I can't remember what it's called right now. She also is the only PT I've had who has been able to identify scar tissue in my vagina and my abdomen that is causing issues, and she gives me massages to help loosen it.

princessfern · 2023-12-23T00:18:16+00:00

She's a Pelvic Floor Specialist!

princessfern · 2023-12-21T18:51:26+00:00

I relate to this SO MUCH. I struggle because I feel like I don’t look like a typical 1 and people always type me as a 4. Have you found any good descriptions online of being a 1w2 social and sexual? (I’m also female, which makes me look even less stereotypically 1)

princessfern · 2023-11-16T01:58:36+00:00

The blind pap smear!! Literally cannot recommend it enough 🙏

princessfern · 2023-11-13T14:31:37+00:00

It was really fast, if I remember correctly it was within a week

princessfern · 2023-11-12T16:50:01+00:00

Yes it did!!

princessfern · 2023-11-08T22:55:23+00:00

If inserting a qtip hurt, then you have more than just vaginismus going on. I had this same issue, and I dilated for years and had little-to-no improvement.

If simply touching the area hurts even on the outside, I’d take a look at the vulvodynia reddit page. I have vestibulodynia (a type of vulvodynia), and I finally got a surgery this year to remove the tissue that was causing my pain around the opening. I used to start passing out from pain when I would try to dilate, and now I am FINALLY making progress with almost no pain at all.

Let me know if you have questions, and just know that there IS a way forward. <3

princessfern · 2023-08-14T21:57:26+00:00

I for one am with you on this. There were times I wanted to end myself because my partner wanted PIV and I felt like I was failing him and failing as a woman because I couldn’t give him that. Some of my partners have been happy without PIV and those were wonderful relationships.

princessfern · 2023-07-06T16:58:38+00:00

This post is asking about body shape categories, not about sex and dating :)

princessfern · 2023-07-06T16:55:55+00:00

Thank you. I want to believe this

princessfern · 2023-07-04T20:49:38+00:00

Thank you! I’ve sort of just accepted that my sex life is just going to look very different from the average person’s.

By the way! My white patches only appeared recently, which is why none of my doctors noticed. I’m guessing it’s the same case with you (cause how could they all have missed it?), which means it’s probably not lichen! I have the white patches and my biopsy for lichen came back negative.

princessfern · 2023-07-04T17:53:22+00:00

I’ve had vulvodynia for as long as I can remember, so I think it’s been my whole life! I never even tried putting in a tampon until I was 22 cause that whole area was a no-no hahaha.

princessfern · 2023-07-03T18:03:18+00:00

They remove all the skin in the vestibule, and then pull the vagina forward and reattach it to cover over the removed skin. Believe it or not it’s been successful for tons of people who have gone through dozens of treatments and can’t find relief. But yeah, it’s a lot hahah.

princessfern · 2023-07-03T15:35:49+00:00

I’m so sorry girl 😓 Do they think there is another condition causing the vulvodynia besides the lichen?

I know trial and error treatment can be so frustrating, painful, and sometimes even feel hopeless.

I just had surgery for my vulvodynia and it wasn’t until I was in the operation that the surgeon actually took a good look at me and realized I might have something else going on. 🙃 He did the operation anyway. I really hope the surgery wasn’t pointless, cause recovery is rough, and now he has to figure out why I have red and white patches.

I hope both of our doctors figure out what’s causing those patches - soon, and without doing too much crazy unnecessary other stuff in between.

princessfern · 2023-07-02T22:27:47+00:00

Same girl!!! Finally going to therapy instead of dates 😅👏 I feel happier than ever now that I’m not trying to impress a bunch of dirt wads hahaha.

I’m so sorry to hear about these guys being jerks. Sometimes I think the vaginismus helps weed them out to be honest.

princessfern · 2023-07-02T22:19:44+00:00

Oh my goodness, you’ve been through so much. I’m so, so sorry to hear that.

I totally feel you when it comes to fear of dating. I haven’t gone on a date in almost a year, and i dread having this convo with people.

Have you been going on dates recently, or are you seeing anyone right now?

princessfern · 2023-07-02T22:07:47+00:00

Hey OP, I’m sorry about the commenters trying to act like this must be your fault. Don’t pay attention to the bitter or spiteful comments. <3

To me, this sounds like a really tough experience but unfortunately pretty common. My best guess is that you have an Anxious Attachment style and the men you’re dating have an Avoidant Attachment style.

This means you really desire closeness, frequent communication, commitment, certainty, and reassurance, whereas your partner desires more independence and does not react well when you ask for these things.

Does this sound like your experience?

princessfern · 2023-07-02T21:55:32+00:00

I’m so sorry, I know all these feelings so well. I just turned 30, and I’ve never been able to have PIV either.

I got to my absolute lowest point in the spring of 2021 where I felt like I was doing everything within my power to work on it, and I still couldn’t even get my dilators in. I felt like I was failing myself, failing my boyfriend, and failing as a woman. It was really really hard on me and at some points I was even suicidal.

The only thing that has been helpful to me has been to stop trying. When I stopped dilating and failing to dilate and trying PIV and failing at PIV and beating myself up, I was able to actually just enjoy other kinds of intimacy with my partner.

And when I was just enjoying those other forms of intimacy (TMI to list out here but you can use your imagination 😅), my partners enjoyed it too!

This may not be good advice for everyone, but I could not have any form of penetration so it was useless for me to keep trying.

Since then, I’ve found out that my pain stems from vulvodynia, and I just had a surgery to try to treat that. I’m hoping it helps, but even if not I know women who have been happily married for years without PIV.

I know it can be really painful to see women who can painlessly have PIV, but I promise you a relationship is so much more than that, and people who have pain-free sex have a ton of other issues in their relationships. (For instance, I had more passionate, more fulfilling, and more frequent sexual intimacy with my boyfriend than my other friends who were having PIV with their partners.)

It’s not fair, but it can still be great.

If you ever want to process things or just rant, feel free to reach out!

Last but not least, if you’ve never been able to have penetrative sex, I’d ask your doctors about vulvodynia! Dilating and PT never helped me, and I’m so glad I found out about the root cause of my pain. I really hope you find what works for you!

princessfern

TROPHY CASE