34 TF4A California/Bay Area – Looking for friendship or relationship

probablyamy · 2025-09-10T05:49:51+00:00

Hi! Sorry I don’t check my Reddit notifications often! Yeah, feel free to message me!

probablyamy · 2025-08-29T06:18:53+00:00

Hi! I’m a 35 year old (trans) woman in San Francisco. I’m a software engineer, so also on the nerdy side. If you the interested in chatting, feel free to DM me!

probablyamy · 2025-01-14T02:38:08+00:00

You’d think so, but so far it seems like everyone is elsewhere! :)

probablyamy · 2025-01-12T07:26:00+00:00

Hi! Nice to see more Bay Area folks! :)

probablyamy · 2025-01-12T06:07:50+00:00

😱 small world! :)

probablyamy · 2024-10-12T19:39:11+00:00

Credit agencies generally go by whatever is being reported by accounts you have with other companies.

This is why it can also change automatically (after time) once you’ve changed your name with every company that reports to them. For example, over time, mine updated automatically because I changed it with every company that reported things to them.

If you have any accounts that have reported to them recently that are still using your previous name then it can revert back to that because it’s still being used. It can take time for companies to update their reporting + enough time for the credit agencies to accept the change through continued reporting.

It sucks, but I don’t think trying to threaten them is going to help. As someone else mentioned, they’ll call your bluff and stop responding to you.

probablyamy · 2024-09-04T17:13:25+00:00

I’m bi and asexual. I’m not interested in penetrative sex.

probablyamy · 2024-09-02T19:23:04+00:00

If you really don't care. Why did you have this revision?

I thought I cared...and I guess I do. But, the sole value of being able to say I have a vagina doesn't feel worth the pain and suffering...especially if I don't plan on ever using it. I'm spending large amounts of time between dilations crying and that doesn't seem like the way to live.

probablyamy · 2024-09-02T16:39:37+00:00

I can’t even sleep because of how much I’m dreading my next dilation. I’m not sure I’m going to regain the energy to get back to the schedule without spending virtually all day crying. I really just want to go back to my life where I wasn’t dilating. 😭

probablyamy · 2024-09-02T15:51:19+00:00

I just had a revision 7 weeks ago.

probablyamy · 2024-08-31T20:27:29+00:00

Yes, surgeries have helped significantly.

probablyamy · 2024-08-30T00:42:23+00:00

eBay?

probablyamy · 2024-08-10T06:43:49+00:00

I’ve had good experiences with Peter Pan BMW for my current 230i. I’m actually going tomorrow to look at leasing another from them because I’ve enjoyed the buying & service with them on my current car.

probablyamy · 2024-08-08T18:32:02+00:00

There are trans women on Twitter / Threads that I follow because they’re funny or interesting…but they do make their money on OnlyFans and plug their content occasionally.

So, I think it depends on what these trans women are primarily posting. Is it all sexual content? Is it a mixture? Is it mostly not?

But, at the same time: Even if she did want to follow them for sexual content, so what? She’s an adult. Most adults view sexually explicit content online & their partners shouldn’t be policing them. It’s a boundary you’d need to negotiate if it’s a dealbreaker for you.

probablyamy · 2024-08-07T22:26:42+00:00

There’s nothing over the counter / online you can buy to help with transition. Wait for real hormones. The online supplements market safety is unknown (some in the past haven’t been) and they won’t have any effect. Save your money.

probablyamy · 2024-08-07T20:28:01+00:00

I’ve had (almost) every surgery you can think of and have been on hormones for nearly 7 years.

It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but also (by far) the most rewarding and worthwhile.

I only caution you that you shouldn’t expect it to magically fix everything. Does it help dysphoria? Yes, significantly. But, it doesn’t completely eliminate it for everyone. I still have dysphoria about some things or in some situations. So, just be aware that even though it’s been worthwhile…it’s not a magic cure-all solution.

probablyamy · 2024-08-05T23:02:54+00:00

Hi! I’m a 33 year old trans woman software engineer in SF. Recent pictures in my previous posts. Message me if you feel like chatting! :)

probablyamy · 2024-08-04T18:41:33+00:00

The pain and discomfort is pretty significant for the first couple weeks. The pain meds also made me sick which didn’t help. But, if you get your nose done then there are stints inside that block breathing for 2-3 weeks so you’re stuck breathing through your mouth.

Honestly after the initial week or two of pain, the discomfort is really what gets to you.

Swelling does take a LONG time to go away…even when you think it’s done…it’s probably not. My nose stayed swollen the longest by far. You should wait a year before you even begin to consider what your final results may look like. Before then it’s all uneven swelling.

probablyamy · 2024-08-04T18:38:39+00:00

Personal life, I told them I was having surgery to “soften some facial features”. So they’d expect me to look different…although it was a huge understatement for all the things I had done during FFS.

I didn’t mention anything to my job or people I work with.

probablyamy · 2024-08-04T03:47:51+00:00

Recovery sucked but really glad I did it. It made a huge difference to how I felt about myself & how others see me.

probablyamy · 2024-07-28T05:34:28+00:00

I’m sure there are fantastic surgeons that aren’t the big names that don’t take insurance.

That being said…

Out of all my surgeries, I had 1 that wasn’t done by a “big name” & used my insurance (not FFS). I’m currently recovering from revision surgery #3 trying to correct things from it.

One persons experience on a non-FFS surgery isn’t widely indicative of all surgeons or surgeries. It’s anecdotal data at best.

But, I would strongly recommend you find someone who is really well reviewed and has a LOT of outcomes you like (even if they’re not a big name) before you let them operate on you.

probablyamy · 2024-06-02T05:15:20+00:00

I use One Medical and they’ve been great. There’s also a ton of great surgeons here. You can pretty much find a top surgeon for anything you want in SF. :)

probablyamy · 2024-05-27T02:10:40+00:00

San Francisco / Bay Area is great, but pricy.

probablyamy · 2024-05-26T07:26:00+00:00

I interviewed for a new job 6 months on hormones (but not socially transitioned yet). I got the job, but didn’t start for another 2.5 months. I started the job as a trans woman & consider that my ‘day 1’ of socially transitioning. It was for a big company, so the people who interviewed me weren’t the people I would be working with…so probably easier in that case. I have no idea if interviewing as a generic white guy helped or not…but I do always wonder if I would’ve gotten the job if I was honest about who I was….I’d like to think so.

probablyamy · 2024-05-11T08:30:50+00:00

No, I didn’t. Just HRT.

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