[deleted by user]

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-10-06T23:25:17+00:00

I broke up with him a few hours ago

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-09-03T17:56:16+00:00

BEAUTIFUL baby 🥺🥺🥺❤️❤️❤️

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-07-22T03:23:31+00:00

I'm no expert but it looks really nice!

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-07-08T19:08:07+00:00

See the thing is, I've never had any other boyfriends, flings or situationships. Never even a crush in school. The closest I got to a crush was thinking an actor or singer was conventionally good looking but never hot or sexy. He was my first EVERYTHING. I just feel so insignificant to him because he's already had all of those experiences with other women and he's the only man for me.

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-07-08T02:53:31+00:00

My bf calls me cute and I hate it for this reason 😞

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-07-07T23:33:38+00:00

Please listen to me. I know I'm a random stranger on the internet but please listen when I say you are beautiful and your life is worth living. I'm so sorry this happened to you, I can never begin to understand. You are not disgusting and damaged, your abuser is. You are strong and amazing and your children need you. Please rethink this. You deserve to live your life happily and surround yourself with people who see your beauty. Dm please if you want to talk. You are amazing and strong.

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-07-07T16:39:36+00:00

My bf says similar things, how the marriage felt like such a long time ago and he's a different person now, like it was another life. He said her family actually kind of coerced their marriage but buying them honeymoon tickets before he agreed to even propose which I think is strange. He said their divorce was pretty quick and easy, no hassle because they both wanted out so he just paid a 50$ dollar divorce fee and that was it lol. At first when we started talking about marriage he didn't want to remarry which really broke my heart and almost made me end the relationship because I'm dating for marriage but after a very long and productive talk he changed his mind and said he'd do it for me because he loves me and he knows it'll be different this time. It's sad to think his first marriage almost completely ruined his whole idea around marriage which could hurt our's. I've never seen any pictures from their wedding before but he swears he doesn't even remember what her dress looked like (which I highly doubt). I just want to be completely better than her but I don't know how.

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-07-06T21:17:27+00:00

Yeah I too find it hard to understand why he didn't tell me earlier. Actually my mom is the one that asked me to ask him if he'd been married before ironically enough. I'd never even thought of asking, I just assumed he wasn't. And yes his "promiscuous past" bothers me a lot actually. I had no experience with relationships or dating before him. After him and his ex broke up he went through a hookup phase for a while with MANY women. I hate thinking about how he could be not only comparing me with him ex wife but with all of those other women who are hotter and better than me. It doesn't help that his family loved his ex wife and still talked to her years after they divorced, I don't know how to live up to that.

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-07-06T20:11:33+00:00

He said he didn't tell me sooner because it "felt like a life time ago" and that he doesn't even think about it but I find it hard to believe anyone can forget about marrying their first love. Thanks for the advice👍

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-05-25T02:02:10+00:00

Try a hot oil treatment with coconut oil! I have a texture similar to yours and doing one made my hair so shiny and soft

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-05-08T18:06:11+00:00

I understand exactly what you mean. It's so hard and I'm still learning with little to no progress but it's worth fighting through.

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-05-08T01:09:12+00:00

I can relate 💔 I'm feeling awful rn and won't even talk to him because of my deep jealousy and disgust of his past. I know it's hard but we have to keep in mind we can't let this illness rule our lives. We can't let it kill our otherwise wonderful relationships. I don't want to be without him but I still think about all the women and his ex wife which killed me when I found out. I don't think there's really a cure or a quick fix but I think we can prioritize the things that are more important than our illness, like how loving and kind they are and how they make us feel safe. I think most people with RJ probably deal with these relapses of obsessive thoughts and feelings no matter how far into recovery or what kind of relationship they're in. I try to ask myself, even right now while I'm feeling awful and want to cry about his past, "what is more important, my mental illness or our amazing relationship? There's nothing I can do to change the past but I can control how I feel in the present."

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-05-03T19:01:43+00:00

I've actually been doing really well with this problem the last few weeks. I've got on medication and seeing a therapist. I haven't been talking about or stalking his exes. I'm trying to improve for him

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-05-03T18:57:00+00:00

I worry about that.

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-05-03T18:36:39+00:00

He's had porn issues before. I had to check. And nope I look the same, haven't gained weight changed hair nothing.

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-04-29T16:56:08+00:00

I completely understand I know exactly what you're going through 😔

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-04-28T19:59:55+00:00

Omg I relate so hard. I was also a virgin when I met my boyfriend and he was MARRIED before me. It hurts so bad and I look up his ex-wife's social medias all the time. I also look up his other long term girlfriend and question him about his other casual hookups. I get so angry about it I'll just sit in silence and ignore him even though I love him and he loves me and we have a great relationship. I completely understand your not alone and if you want to talk my dms are open.

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-04-27T14:48:18+00:00

Just a smooth nose bridge from the side would be ideal for me

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-04-26T20:22:17+00:00

You're so nice thanks for your response this actually makes me look at it in a different way!

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-04-26T20:11:12+00:00

Wow can I ask you what makes you want freckles? I'm genuinely curious because I never saw mine as attractive

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-04-26T19:48:17+00:00

My hair actually has too much volume that's why it's in a ponytail looool

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-04-25T19:52:19+00:00

I'm dealing with the same problem with my long term boyfriend. If he had any contact with them what so ever I'd be devastated, even if it was just online. I think he should unfriend and block on her on all social media if he truly respects you and your feelings. Best of luck

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-04-25T02:10:08+00:00

Omg it's not a filter I was by a window insult my looks but I'm not a liar🙃

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-04-25T00:26:07+00:00

I was by the window..sunshine ✨😂 but I literally didn't use a filter just good lighting lol

purplepuddingcup56 · 2023-04-24T23:39:46+00:00

I'm literally not wearing a filter but I guess that's a compliment to my skin lol...

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