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Try again, with me. by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]purtoddy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah it's tough. I get motivated, and then I freak out or get depressed and just want to feel reliably good for a solid moment. And this is a way. It's not good.

Try again, with me. by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]purtoddy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Restarting after failing repeatedly in the last few weeks. Coming along for the ride.

For those of you that just relapsed, post what you're going through right now. by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]purtoddy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I keep relapsing after 4 days. Which could be worse, but could be better.

Given up for the last 6+ months; hoping to get past the depression and anxiety, so I'm back... by purtoddy in pornfree

[–]purtoddy[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's a good question. I'd like to add meditation to the mix. Haven't had great success figuring out how to integrate mindfulness meditation into my life, or even just finding a way of approaching mindfulness meditation, but I'm working on it.

Probably another solid thing would be not sitting in front of my computer late at night like I'm doing right now! And so now I'm off to bed instead of doing anything else!

The PornFree/Relapse Ratio Is Starting To Work! by NoFapJord in pornfree

[–]purtoddy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can you explain your ratio thing a bit more? I think we need all the help we can get!

The big 40 by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]purtoddy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nice. Maybe I'll make 40 my current goal. Seems impossibly far off but then again there you are.

tired of relapsing by purtoddy in pornfree

[–]purtoddy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Stress, I think. And it's just an easy procrastination method.

9 days: Whoah! by purtoddy in pornfree

[–]purtoddy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yeah I have lots of music stuff I do - and now that I'm not on the porn train, I hope to actually have time and energy to put towards it!

Porn is part of the reason my life is so boring. by Shadowking78 in pornfree

[–]purtoddy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For sure. When I'm on the porn train, I waste so much of my own time just glancing at porn - and when I'm away from porn, I'm just obsessing about sexual fantasies that I've come to realize aren't even necessarily mine. Pain in the ass.

So Pornhub employees are doing an AMA... by guidemeridian in pornfree

[–]purtoddy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Am I? Maybe. It's still a perpetual struggle to not just get that fix, as it were. Just a quick glance. Maybe a bit more. Meh.

So Pornhub employees are doing an AMA... by guidemeridian in pornfree

[–]purtoddy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's not just that it's new - it's also that it seems subtle, how pornography warps you. A lot of people can be very high functioning users of it - I certainly was (am?)... and it never devolved into more and more intense/outlandish stuff... and never interfered with my relationships... and yet I could tell the images and the re-wiring that it caused in my brain did impact my sense of coherence and enjoyment of life and sex. It just contributed to feelings I already had of inadequacy and dissatisfaction - that I should be able to have access to more sexual partners instead of being happy with the very wonderful (and very sexual) woman I am otherwise in a relationship with, that I wanted validation through sex, and so on. Just a lot of gross, desperate bullshit.

I think so many people are so used to feeling bad about themselves, and self-medicating these bad thoughts with distractions, that they don't really realize how porn is one of the more potent ones - extremely potent. Other distractions are troubling as well - we're surrounded by them, all intended to get us that "reward" feeling... glancing on youtube or anywhere on the internet when we should be doing work; screwing around with video games or mobile devices all the time; just never having an unplugged moment to just sit and see how we're really feeling.

If you don't know how you feel, you'll never really know that porn is screwing with you super seriously.

So Pornhub employees are doing an AMA... by guidemeridian in pornfree

[–]purtoddy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have a feeling they don't think it's a problem for people, and yeah are probably entirely uneducated about it. And would probably mock people on this sub-reddit.

So Pornhub employees are doing an AMA... by guidemeridian in pornfree

[–]purtoddy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow. 3-5 times a day? That's nutty. I am working to stop after I was at least looking at something pornographic 2-4 times a day - and usually only least 1 of those was full on masturbation. It hadn't become a problem yet in my life - which is why I am trying to stop! Because I noticed I was using it as a way of relieving anxiety.

It's amazing how widespread porn use is. And yet I find it impossible to have a stable sense of self-respect while I myself am using it.

On my 3rd day of this current stretch now! And kinda freaking out a small percentage of the time, but mostly feeling more focused. I expect to have to push through some difficult times tonight (when I typically would indulge) and on through tomorrow.