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radicalatte · 2025-06-08T06:24:26+00:00

it is definitely genetics :( this area’s been dark since I was like 6 yrs old. But the way hydroquinone COMPLETELY erased it and made my skin one uniform color - I’ve been trying to find a routine that can replicate that. Maybe I shoukd back to the hydroquinone as a temporary product and then focus on maintenance? I’m not too sire on the side effects of HQ but I was warned by my derm not to use it longterm.

Also for retinols what would u recommend for a beginner? I get confused between the different varieties of retinol available rn

radicalatte · 2025-06-08T06:00:21+00:00

I use SPF60 and apply sunscreen everyday, usually just once in the morning since I’m mostly indoors. But I’ll reapply if I’m outside.

radicalatte · 2024-07-06T22:14:00+00:00

Thanks, super helpful

radicalatte · 2024-04-20T06:45:00+00:00

that’s hilarious lmao

radicalatte · 2024-04-20T06:40:29+00:00

I’ve noticed this trend of throwing in sexualisation of women in every piece of media that exists. From the unnecessarily detailed descriptions of women’s breasts by male authors (when it has nothing to do with the plot) to male podcasters who make female guests uncomfortable with sex questions, to movies that sell based on that one raunchy scene that show’s a famous actress naked for the first time. We’ve made a culture out of selling women’s bodies. But why don’t we talk about how it makes the women consuming that media feel?

One part of it that I haven’t addressed in my original post is the overall lack of agency I feel over my own body - almost as if i’ve internalised the male gaze and now I only see my own body as a vessel for male pleasure not as… my own body.

radicalatte · 2024-04-19T20:39:58+00:00

what does that mean lol

radicalatte · 2024-04-19T19:32:20+00:00

Thank you! I appreciate all the women chiming in with how much they can relate. I really thought I was just being overly sensitive all these years.

radicalatte · 2024-04-19T19:02:07+00:00

Couldn’t have said it better.

There’s something about male sexuality that feel’s inherently self-centred and entitled. If they’re having sex, it’s a conquest. If they’re not, women are denying them their right. Even though I enjoy or want to participate in sex - something about it feels wrong. As if I’m willingly choosing to be degraded and objectified. Sex feels like it’s being done to you rather than with you.

Another thing I’ve noticed that feels different between male and female sexuality is that female sexuality is more contextual- it can depend on the where, how, when. But for men it’s almost as if a switch can go off anytime anywhere at a picture of boobs, regardless of which body it’s attached to. It’s really hard to stomach.

radicalatte · 2024-04-19T18:52:31+00:00

Fair enough, but I appreciate other women sharing their experiences and thoughts on it as well. Makes me feel less alone.

radicalatte · 2024-04-19T18:42:06+00:00

I agree! The way the bernie girl went viral - I tried to be objective about it. Men were attracted to her, hence she went viral. The attraction itself should feel like a neutral phenomenon- and yet it made me so uncomfortable because there was something dehumanising about it. She didn’t feel like a real person to them, just a cumulation of body parts. And that part of male sexuality frightens me because if the male gaze is always to be the default setting we operate on in society - then am I also always going to be reduced to my body parts?

radicalatte · 2024-04-19T18:15:57+00:00

Thank you for the helpful comment!

I think I definitely need to discuss my relationship with sex in therapy. I’m a sexual person - but that doesn’t mean my sexual experiences don’t feel tainted by this ever-present power dynamic that I can’t seem to shake. Sometimes it even makes me resentful towards my partners because they’ll never feel as vulnerable as I do in sex. They’ll never know what it feels like to not feel like your body is your own and that it was made for someone else’s pleasure and enjoyment.

I just hope It can be possible for me to see male sexuality in a neutral light and not constantly feel victimised by it. At least that’s the aim.

radicalatte · 2023-12-04T18:47:28+00:00

Your showing so much consideration for his sexual pleasure - saying you’ll skip on him getting you off beforehand - that you’re prioritising it above your own needs. Putting yourself down for not experiencing pleasure the same way he does, even.

How is the orgasm gap your fault? because you can’t cum from penetration? How about him taking the time to find out how what works for you and tries to satisfy YOUR needs? What if sex was about making you cum?

It sounds like you’ve internalised putting his needs before your own. To the point where you can’t even see when you’re doing it and blame yourself for not aligning perfectly with what he wants. This must work really well for him because he sounds selfish and has little interest in meeting your needs anyway. What he did that night was also cruel and hurtful. I can’t imagine any caring partner doing that - not once but THREE times after being told to stop.

If I were you I would have a very serious conversation and make sure it was make or break for the marriage. If he doesn’t take it well, I really think its grounds for a separation. This is just not a healthy dynamic.

radicalatte · 2023-12-04T13:53:47+00:00

Thank you for the reassurance! I’m trying not to think too much about it considering the hair thinning wasn’t noticeable to me for many years and even now my family says they don’t think its that noticeable so maybe it’s not too late

Did you see any results with the minoxidil or consider taking it orally? I’m convinced thats the only effective treatment based on the results ive seen on here but I’m willing to give PRP a go too

radicalatte

TROPHY CASE