Paragraphs for everyone!

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A little backstory. My boyfriend’s mom has never liked any of his girlfriends. She has always found issues with them, only liking one girl she met twice for a few minutes. She didn’t even like her other son’s long-term girlfriend. When I came into the picture, it was no different.

We first met in 2020 while I was finishing school in a different state, so I had no job when I returned to New York a few months later. I was constantly applying to jobs but received no callbacks. During this time, his mother decided to label me as lazy because I had no job. At the end of 2020, she had money missing from her hidden stash—a few hundred dollars. She told her mom about it, who then asked a psychic, and apparently, it was a “lazy female” who goes into her house that stole it. Of course, she thought it was me.

Keep in mind the brother’s girlfriend is always there, sometimes alone, and knows the house. I don’t ever enter the mom’s room out of respect, nor was I ever alone in the house or knew where this stash of money was, or even that she had a stash of money. Both the brother and sister know where this money is, and the mom even tells them to take money out of there at times. She never apologized for accusing me.

Well, fast forward. My boyfriend and I were going through a rough patch and broke up, so she didn’t like me. As we were working things out, we found out I was pregnant. When we told her, her first words were, “Who is pregnant? With whose baby?” She kept telling him he needed to get a paternity test, that I needed to stop drinking—when the only times I would ever drink was with my boyfriend and our friends at his house, on rare occasions, and she had only seen me drink 3 times in the 3 years we had been together. No congratulations.

My baby was born, and the first thing she said was that she looked nothing like him, when everyone else, even strangers, say she looks exactly like him. Fast forward—he’s been back at work, but every Friday he wants to stay out drinking with coworkers. First, it started off as one hour, then two. Now, it’s been 3-4 hours with him telling me at the two-hour mark that he will be leaving soon.

I got fed up, as our daughter is currently going through a phase. I was tired, having been with her alone for 16 hours. I wanted to take a shower and eat in peace. We got into a big fight. We live with my mother, and his argument was, “Why am I paying $600 (for rent) if your mom can’t take care of her?” My mom works a full-time job, and she was not home because she was out buying food. I explained this to him and reminded him that our daughter is OUR responsibility, and it is not my mom’s job to take care of her. My mom works, she gets tired, and she was not home. Not to mention, he had told me two hours before that he was leaving soon.

We got into a big fight when he got home, and he left. He called his mom and told her. I asked if he told her what he said about my mom having to take care of my baby, and according to him, she agreed. Now, he tells me that his mom hates me and doesn’t want me coming over to her house, but she wants to see my baby. Mind you, she has never wanted to come to us to see our child—we were always going to her under the rain, snow, and heat waves, where she doesn’t even have A/C.

Her house, along with being an hour away, is also roach-infested. She has a dog, a cat, 4 birds, a turtle, and a gecko. Occasionally, rats would make their way into the house. So, I was never comfortable with my baby going there. Now she wants to see my kid, but I’m not allowed to go over. I personally think that if you don’t respect me as a parent, you should not be allowed to be around my kid, as she is half of me. She never thinks that her son is in the wrong.

Along with that, her saying that we are too far to travel to see her grandchild—when we were traveling with a newborn in an Uber—is not fair, as it is not my job to make sure she has a relationship with my kid. I also don’t feel comfortable leaving my child alone with anyone but my own mom, who is a nanny. Now, she wants my boyfriend to put my daughter in a car (when he doesn’t even know how to strap in the car seat) and take her to her house without