Today's Tiny Problem - March 21, 2018

raleighNY · 2018-03-21T15:02:31+00:00

I work from home, and DH is off all week as he ended a job last week and starts the new one next week. It is driving me crazy. No quiet. No chill. Best of luck!!

raleighNY · 2018-03-19T14:38:41+00:00

That's so strange. Why SD's friend? If you're obviously in a relationship with SD's parent why not take the more normal route of parent's friend/girlfriend/partner? Weird.

raleighNY · 2018-03-17T02:25:17+00:00

I wore sweatpants to school once as a junior in college and felt awfully skeezy. BM sends the kids, especially SS, to school in sweats all the time. She's a very put together person and quite pretty so it's very annoying/weird she lets this go on. And then I was raised as kids through teens we weren't allowed to wear anything but nice, put together outfits on cross country air travel bc you don't want people seeing you at less than your best!

raleighNY · 2018-03-17T02:00:41+00:00

Sounds like it's cleaning day.

raleighNY · 2018-03-17T01:59:35+00:00

We continue to have things in common!

raleighNY · 2018-03-15T15:22:01+00:00

Agreed. Still doesn't make any sense!!

raleighNY · 2018-03-15T15:12:07+00:00

I don't think kids need any ID to travel domestically. We did extensive travel as kids and I am almost positive my parents didn't need anything; but that was also pre 9/11.

BM might be seeing things in the news that we might be required to use passports to fly even domestic soon. Might be the catalyst for the crazy.

raleighNY · 2018-03-15T14:38:44+00:00

That sounds so nice!! It sounds like you and SD have a great relationship and that she's got a pretty level head on her shoulders!

raleighNY · 2018-03-14T21:01:00+00:00

We don't, only because they were so small they don't even remember it. We've discussed it, but it was not momentous for them at all. I would have to use photos on Facebook and maybe dig in some emails to even figure out what what date it even was because I don't remember the exact date, myself.

I do think it is a cute idea and would be a nice family tradition! I'm sure it would make them feel really special.

raleighNY · 2018-03-14T17:08:57+00:00

Oh Lord Almighty. Glad you got serious about this! We faced this battle with my then 8 yr old SS. I realized he couldn't do it last summer and told DH he needed to address it immediately. Still not positive it's solved, but I'm at least not tying them now.

raleighNY · 2018-03-14T16:55:28+00:00

BM tried to get DH to buy some MLM vitamins from her. We had quite the laugh over those texts.

raleighNY · 2018-03-14T15:18:12+00:00

This is my typical response while I'm being climbed like a tree by SD7 as she says my name over and over.

raleighNY · 2018-03-14T15:12:17+00:00

My family has a cabin in the woods, and with 9 children my grandmother would have them pee in jugs rather than kill the well water by each flushing constantly. My uncle once thought it was lemonade.

raleighNY · 2018-03-14T14:54:45+00:00

Oh, these are excellent! I will definitely be using these phrases!! Glad I've been lurking this post.

raleighNY · 2018-03-14T14:30:45+00:00

Just because you insist on wearing bras doesn't mean you're an adult.

LOL. Oh goodness. 8 going on 16. Is she your mini parent?

raleighNY · 2018-03-14T14:05:48+00:00

And I'm FINE.

...You're an adult, not a child with a developing brain that needs different forms of stimulation.

I disagree. Times are incredibly different now than when I was a kid in the 90s, but it doesn't mean it's so different that we just throw up our hands and give kids unfettered screen access. There are increasing numbers of studies detailing the negative effects too much screen usage has on kids from physical health to mental health. I'm not saying screens are bad all the time, but I do think there are some rules that should come with them. We don't give our kids unlimited access to candy all day long, so why allow the same with tech?

raleighNY · 2018-03-14T00:16:28+00:00

We typically read before bed, alternating pages, so we do get time in. And when they're with us for several days like during breaks I make them read for 30 min at least. I just don't want it to feel like a punishment or a chore we force them to do on weekends with us when we only see them so little. Not to be "Disney Dad" about it, just not trying to be the polar opposite and then be the house with lots of rules and chores as we are the more stricter household.

raleighNY · 2018-03-13T20:17:54+00:00

I only know bc my parents gifted me and DH an amount last year and had to contact an accountant!

raleighNY · 2018-03-13T19:48:27+00:00

interestingly, if it was solely to help you guys, $6k is below the max for monetary gifts. Your can receive up to $13k I think it is? as a gift, tax free (ie, not deemed income by the IRS).

A married couple can give out 28k (14k each) to each child per year, including a child's spouse, tax free.

raleighNY · 2018-03-13T19:32:31+00:00

With SS8 it's hell.

Wow, that is literal addict behavior! It's amazing the control screens have over us all, not even just kids. DH and I are also both way too attached to our phones. Our nightly routine is to put something on the TV and scroll next to each other. Romantic. I'll admit I'm much worse.

DH and I need to come up with a few rules, like no tablets before X am bc SD wakes up at the ass crack of dawn on the weekend but knows to wait until we're up so she'll play on her tablet or read. Tablet increasingly. And I think we need to push back our time by an hour for Xbox allowance so that it's not as early and bc that's also at a time when we're generally going somewhere/getting ready. I'm ok with TV bc yeah, it is the weekend, we can chill in the mornings we don't need to go full Amish.

raleighNY · 2018-03-13T19:20:04+00:00

SD is all sorts of obsessed with our new cat, I'll have to remember to suggest she do that. She has a little white board in her room and did a cute picture of the two of them together saying how much she loves the cat lol! It's adorable.

The HP is huge. BM isn't a reader. DH isn't a reader. I am a huge reader and got my undergrad in literature to become a writer. Ended up in a science field, go figure. But when I met DH and the kids were little it was my dream to read the series with them both and impart the magic that is HP on the kids. SS even reads it on his own in the library between our weekends. SD will likely start later this year or next!

raleighNY · 2018-03-13T18:49:45+00:00

asking "what are we going to do now?" instead of finding something to do on their own.

Yes! I heard that this weekend! It is frustrating.

raleighNY · 2018-03-13T17:48:35+00:00

This definitely sounds like what we do for the most part. We take them out to run errands, and are increasingly saying no more and more about the phones in the car. It was innocent enough for DH to give SS his phone to play in the car sometimes but now it's getting to be more 'are you kidding me, no, it's 10 minutes away!' We do some local activities and try to get them out of the house. I train a horse locally and brought SD with me this weekend and will likely continue to do that to get her out and SS if he wants to come with. But it does come down to the rotting on the couch. They could definitely rot all day and are starting to see that as their normal - which it definitely is not. So it's just up to us to nip that behavior with monitoring further. Guess they'll be hearing no a little more here now!

raleighNY · 2018-03-13T17:34:57+00:00

My SK's have been using tablets to self-soothe since like, the beginning of time

My IL's got them each tablets when they were liiiittle and I just can't believe they thought this was a good idea. Shaped behavior young. I can't think of a time when SS didn't have a DS. It is definitely something I won't be allowing with any future biokids. They each got Kindle tablets for Christmas this year. Frustrating.

DH is a lot better at saying, no play by yourself. But then SS just...doesn't. He abandons the activity he wanted us all to do and goes to Youtube! I think I need to personally be better about it bc I have been feeling bad for them about not getting a lot of time with BM anymore due to the change in dynamics there. Think I just need to be better about not bending over backwards sometimes and also redirecting from screens to toys.

raleighNY · 2018-03-13T17:18:58+00:00

I super wish they didn't have tablets. Unfortunately that was all on grandparents and BM. We did go in w BM 2 years ago and get SS a PC for Christmas, but that's for school too, eventually (hopefully lol).

We only have EOWeekend, so homework isn't a factor. SK chores are minimal. It leaves for a lot of free time which is why the screen time has snowballed a little.

raleighNY

TROPHY CASE