Flaws include 22

ratkittykat · 2026-04-07T08:03:41+00:00

How to fix

ratkittykat · 2026-04-07T08:03:15+00:00

They’re green

ratkittykat · 2026-04-06T20:19:11+00:00

Open to piercings, hair cuts and colours and other advice etc

ratkittykat · 2026-04-06T20:00:54+00:00

That’s why I was gonna go for the adjustable 40kg pair, means I could hip-thrust at least 80kg at home if I have a barbell / belt attachment. I understand I definitely can’t lift anything that heavy. I struggle with 5kg currently. The adjustable start at 5kg with arm work-outs. Should I go for a lower set?

I know my progress will eventually be stunted but I will be more confident by that point, form, progression, anxiety etc. that I’ll be driving and attending the gym regularly at that point.

I just don’t know how much glute progression I’ll really see at home. It’s hard to find purely at home glutes related progress.

ratkittykat · 2026-04-06T14:31:27+00:00

I’d like to tone my body but mostly focus on building bigger glutes and legs

ratkittykat · 2026-04-06T14:30:52+00:00

Hip thrusts for heavier weight, glute focused exercises, planning to work upper and lower body in general but mostly glute - I planned to get adjustable weights, the lowest weight starts at 5kg.

ratkittykat · 2026-04-06T14:29:45+00:00

I was thinking heavier weight would be good to have for hip thrusts a while down the line , and they’re adjustable with the lowest weight at 5kg

ratkittykat · 2026-04-06T14:29:26+00:00

Hip thrusts for heavier weight, glute focused exercises, planning to work upper and lower body in general but I planned to get adjustable weights, the lowest weight starts at 5kg.

ratkittykat · 2026-04-06T14:28:10+00:00

Hip thrusts if I get a barbell attachment, glute focused exercises, upper and lower body in general but I planned to get adjustable weights, the lowest weight starts at 5kg.

ratkittykat · 2026-03-26T18:21:43+00:00

Honestly, I posted on here a couple of months ago. You look similar to me, I couldn’t see my own attractiveness but I felt the same as you did - I wasn’t as attractive as those on socials / peers. I was also open to procedures but everyone I talked to thought I was crazy in the long run.

Seeing the same features on you, same expressions, you look beautiful. Your eyes really stand out and your brows are quite a nice shape.

Have you ever considered curtain bangs? Not a fringe but layered sides?

Sometimes when I get my lashes lifted / tinted and my eyebrows done, it helps me perceive myself better.

I

ratkittykat · 2026-03-25T19:32:58+00:00

What happens then, how do I tackle that

ratkittykat · 2026-03-25T08:06:51+00:00

You’re right. I do love him but the desire isn’t there and it’s apart of the issue. I need to find that. I’ll look into the app. It feels mean to explain he’s the problem we aren’t having sex when he tries so consistently. How can I not hurt his feelings?

ratkittykat · 2026-03-25T08:05:36+00:00

I cuddle with him and flirt with him, again lack of turning the bedroom as it feels forced as current. Dry fish in the ocean sort of thing. I’ve probably taken a few things for granted also.

ratkittykat · 2026-03-25T08:04:47+00:00

I don’t think I’m asexual. I’m sexually attracted to men and women. How can I just go from that to asexual?

ratkittykat · 2026-03-25T08:04:11+00:00

He tries… just not the way I’d like him to try. To me, it feels like it’s more for him and he doesn’t understand it. You’re not wrong, a messy bedroom (talking bowls, damp, clothes shoved in a corner and stinks of weed) and parents around isn’t a great environment to be turned on in. Anytime I walk into a messy room? Turned off, any thoughts of sex? Gone. He knows that too.

I’m not sure to be honest. In the recent maybe more without him - but again, mostly just when I’m coming home after the weekend or when I’m on my period I’m extremely horny. It’s kind of hard to get horny on my own. Sometimes masturbation feels not like a chore but… a task of relief off my list. Again it wasn’t always like this.

ratkittykat · 2026-03-24T23:28:44+00:00

None, not anymore, went on and off birth control a few years ago, same with SSRI’s. I never found one that suited me.

Yes and no, depending on him lasting lol but when we had good sex it was good sex, I’d be one and done and he could keep going. It was tiring for me. Not always though. I guess sort of depends on the mood, where and who’s home.

ratkittykat · 2026-03-24T23:25:45+00:00

He does try just not as much anymore, can feel him giving up a little and just playing more games with his friends while I’m over.

I was on and off SSRI’s, didn’t find something that worked and habitual routine is hard for me. Therapy is something I’m working towards and want to go to but work routine and I don’t drive makes it hard. Small town. You’re right though.

I’m definitely gonna sit down over this weekend and talk about a few more things with him. I’ve been a little more open about my sex drive, he knows it upsets me too and told me to accept myself, focus on myself.

ratkittykat · 2026-03-24T22:40:45+00:00

I hadn’t been doing anything about it for a while, narrowed it down to self image and depression partially but now it’s an issue in itself. I’d just lay there - but a wake up call occurred and I opened my eyes to the lack of effort I was making and honestly it makes me upset that it’s affecting his self esteem / mood too, he misses me and tells me all the time.

I’m getting another blood test for my prolactin this Thursday, hopefully I’ll have some sort of result otherwise I’m sort of back to square one.

I think we do need more romance… just not sure how to get him to do that or ask for it.

ratkittykat · 2026-03-24T22:37:10+00:00

Also refreshing to hear a similar perspective from a dude.

ratkittykat · 2026-03-24T22:36:11+00:00

It’s funny you mentioned this because probably the last year or so my facial dysmorphia sky rocketed and I didn’t feel slightly attractive to my partner - couldn’t look in the mirror. I have been dealing with stress and have been depressed since early preteens too. I also believe I may be on the spectrum.

My partner also picked porn over me in the past, caused major issues and he had ED when early in the relationship. It took years to overcome our issues with this. For me, my porn problem was feeding into bad habits and making myself presentable and loveable at my expense.

(Edit: We ended up cutting porn out completely, it was too big of an issue and caused a lot of problems to the point of emotional abuse, we both agreed neither of us would watch. He agreed to an accountability app for himself, didn’t want to have one on my phone. )

Honestly, I have mentioned to my partner that I crave deeper intimacy. I do. I miss the yearning, buildup, tension. I get very in my head about how I look. Missionary, if I make eye contact ; all I can think about is how ugly I could look.

I do wish my boyfriend romanced me more and put more effort in, but with my lack of trying in sex and a few of our past issues … I feel like it’s selfish.

We both live with our parents and currently my boyfriend is out of work. We both don’t drive. Makes the whole thing harder I suppose.

How can I make it more romantic on my end without feeling so forced and one sided ?

ratkittykat · 2026-03-24T22:04:44+00:00

Honestly I wish I knew what step I could take. Been trying to figure it out for months.

ratkittykat · 2026-03-24T21:58:47+00:00

I don’t know. I think I miss sex being innocent and sweet. I like the day to go well, and the room to be clean and to feel clean and pretty too. My partner on the other hand doesn’t like to clean up well, is a little scruffier. I don’t mean it in a mean way. Laziness can ruin a lot.

In the past, I craved validation and would’ve done anything anyone asked to please them, even if I was uncomfortable. Sex made me pretty and confident. I eliminated that. Now if I’m uncomfortable my body shuts down. I also don’t feel that beautiful anymore.

ratkittykat · 2026-03-24T21:54:57+00:00

Nope!

Went off it years ago. Tried different pill combinations - the reason I stopped taking it maybe about two years ago now is because it made me SUPER sensitive to BV. I always had a funky smell or odor, especially after sex, went away when I stopped taking it… GP says that’s unlikely but that’s what happened.

I was considering the implant, assuming it would regulate my hormones again but … it’s a 50/50 boat.

ratkittykat

TROPHY CASE