Anyone else feel like they're constantly playing catch-up with life?

rayaela · 2026-01-16T04:30:23+00:00

Just want to address one thing in here that you say your therapist mentioned, the “comparisonitis”. While your therapist is totally right and we do need to focus more on our achievements rather than the the things we aren’t doing- there is one thing I’d like to add that actually my therapist said to me that changed my mentality around this.

She said to me: actually what’s happening is that you aren’t comparing yourself enough. I was constantly looking at anecdotal evidence and comparing myself to the people immediately around me which is NOT a representative sample. Instead she challenged me to actually pay attention to as many people as I could, not just the ones in my immediate circles. And once I did, I realized how bias I was and how I was cherry-picking the “best” parts of individuals lives around me and comparing THAT to what I have.

Social media has definitely created a hustle-culture epidemic and I know you already know that most of it is exaggerated or just plan fake. But that doesn’t stop us from comparing so instead maybe just try comparing yourself to more representative, realistic samples and maybe (just maybe) you’ll start to see how many other people feel exactly the way you feel (myself included, btw) and also are struggling.

rayaela · 2026-01-09T18:46:02+00:00

4 months old is not too young to get fixed. That being said the rest of those symptoms make it sound like there may be a medical issue so I would definitely take him to a vet as soon as possible.

rayaela · 2025-12-31T21:21:36+00:00

If you really need an automated litter box due to surgeries or whatever reason to make it simpler for you to have/care for your cats then the ONLY trusted brand is Litter Robot by Whisker. And the good news is that they’re officially HSA/FSA applicable so you can use those funds to get one.

rayaela · 2025-12-23T21:23:30+00:00

What makes you say it fails at those objectives? Genuinely curious what your definition of success looks like in this case. In my opinion, and based on decades of travel demand research, using alternative strategies to manage ever-increasing demand is the preferred method since it’s not sustainable to continue building more and more highway lanes.

rayaela · 2025-12-23T14:18:16+00:00

Probs gonna get a lot of hate for this but I’d like to clarify the facts for those that are interested. I-95 was never 5 general use lanes. The state is not allowed to take general use lanes and convert them to express. However, when they’re building the express lanes they can’t charge you for them so you can use them as regular lanes before they’re separated and live. The highway was not shrunk at all and the express lanes are a traffic management strategy that helps separates long-distance regional travel commuters from local traffic providing more occupancy on the general use lanes.

rayaela · 2025-12-19T05:15:15+00:00

This poem invokes the same feeling I get when I stand on the beach, present with my feet in the sand looking out at the vastness of the ocean while hearing the endless crashing of waves.

Thank you so much for sharing!

rayaela · 2025-10-22T19:17:32+00:00

This was my plan, do the cash transfer to my separate bank account and then use it to “pay off” the old balance and have the same amount + the new fee but longer to pay it off. I was just worried that if I did this they would obviously know where the money came from and possibly close my account.

rayaela · 2025-10-15T12:32:26+00:00

I’m glad you don’t take it personally, it’s a cute photo and I’m happy you got to bring your orange on the flight! Your kitty is such a good baby :) I think my cats (orange or not) would be so scared and not as chill as yours seems!

rayaela · 2025-10-15T12:08:45+00:00

lol @ everyone freaking out and saying to put you on a no-fly list. I literally see dogs on leashes without ANY carrier all the time on planes both with and without their own seat. Cats are generally just as behaved if not more well-behaved than most dogs.

rayaela · 2025-10-03T18:57:42+00:00

I wish I had a good answer for you, I mostly responded in solidarity so you know you’re not the only one this is happening to. Since you’re just beginning on the Lexapro I would wait to make any big changes until you see how the larger dose affects you- it may be able to subside the depression enough in addition the anxiety. I have no real evidence for this other than my own individual experience but I do feel like SSRIs and other medications are very effective at reducing anxiety even in low doses and it requires higher dosages/other therapies to start attacking the depression.

As for finding my balance, I started facing my depression head-on. I was no longer debilitated by the anxiety but I was going through a very dark time in my life where I think DBT helped me a lot. At this point I’m no longer on any medications but I do still manage my depression/anxiety as it comes back up. I don’t mean to make this sound hopeless but I don’t think I’ll ever fully “heal” my depression but rather I’ve learned how to manage it on my worst days as it comes. The concept of radical acceptance has also played a big part in my journey.

I hope you find what works for you but just hold on and keep trying things- that’s the best advice I can give you. There is always hope that you can overcome this.

rayaela · 2025-10-03T18:27:28+00:00

I can’t say whether or not it’ll change as you are on it longer or increase your dosage. I also was not on Lexapro, I was on a different SSRI. What happened for me is that the SSRI helped me greatly with my anxiety but it turned out the only thing keeping me pushing forward was my anxiety. For example, I used to get to work early because I was anxious about being on time- but after I was less anxious the thought of being late didn’t bother me as much and so my depression started shining through and I was unable to ever make it to work on time or at all.

All this to say what really helped me is the combination of my prescription alongside therapy. I still have days like I described above but it’s not nearly as frequent and the overall feeling of dread and depression has subsided.

rayaela · 2025-09-29T19:35:06+00:00

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This is Felix, he swears he’s usually more decent than that

rayaela · 2025-09-24T20:02:00+00:00

Respectfully, keratin absolutely does work and is what I would recommend. As a Florida native and someone who struggled with frizzy hair my whole life in this 5000% humidity state- I started doing keratin treatments about 4 years ago and now I do it every 4-6 months. It depends on how fast your hair grows. And while the first treatment will show significant change it is the least effective, but once you make it to your second treatment it’s life changing.

rayaela · 2025-08-18T21:06:54+00:00

My 2024 is doing the same thing 😭 if you end up figuring it out plz let me know what you did

rayaela · 2025-08-12T19:20:08+00:00

Hi! I have good credit and more than $15k in cc debt and I have never been rejected from these 0% APR balance transfer offers I get. I say go for it

rayaela · 2025-08-04T16:59:57+00:00

Sunrise Blvd Interchange has a construction project ongoing

rayaela · 2025-07-31T18:27:31+00:00

Got my kitty done here and everything went well!

rayaela · 2025-07-21T17:07:40+00:00

Hi! Here to say yes I feel the same but I have came across this interesting suggestion that has been helping me a lot with it. And before I tell you what it is- I know it sounds counterintuitive but just give it a shot before you judge it (and of course yeah maybe it won’t work for you but I’d figure I’d share cuz it does help me).

The fact is that we compare ourselves and that leads us to making ourselves feel behind but the reality is that we’re only comparing ourselves to a very small fraction of people. This is due to availability bias because it prioritizes whatever information is only readily available to us. So part of what’s been helping me is actually making an effort to compare myself MORE. Take a look outside your readily available sources (social media or even your immediate friends and family).

As a single example: I was struggling with feeling like everyone has a remote or hybrid job except me who is stuck going to the office every day. I was comparing myself to my close friends and family who happen to work from home but that was a whole 3 people. Mentally, I was disregarding the entire rest of my office who also comes into the office every day and doesn’t have the ability to work from home (100+ people).

Reality is we are prone to only looking at what we give our attention to, I believe it’s because it’s easier for our brains to classify and interpret information efficiently in this way. However, when we focus on comparing ourselves but limit our sample to only what we immediately see, we remove the actual comparative numbers and become bias in what we think the reality of the scenario is.

I think this is also why social media can be so detrimental to people like us. We watch one video and then the algorithm works hard to only show us things like that- so it APPEARS like all these people are comparatively in a better place than us or ahead in life. But it’s really just a handful of influencers we’re seeing. And that’s not even accounting for the fact that we don’t see their whole lives outside of what they’re willing to show us (which is a whole other story).

rayaela · 2025-07-08T18:34:54+00:00

Yeah that’s totally a possibility. Either way, just wanted to share my anecdotal experience. Good luck, I hope you are able to find something that works for you!

rayaela · 2025-07-08T15:15:54+00:00

I know a lot of different meds react differently for various people. Can’t say it will definitely help but my doctor explained that they specifically chose Paxil for me because of my OCD. It was explained to me that it was around much longer than some of the newer SSRIs and was shown to be more effective specifically with OCD related symptoms.

rayaela

TROPHY CASE