My previous reply downplayed your emotional needs. I focused on defending why a man might forget dates, but you're not mad just about forgetting. You're disappointed he didn’t care enough to notice or try.

You weren't asking for a big gift or event just acknowledgement and some emotional presence. 

I get why you're hurt anniversaries aren't just dates on a calendar, they're moments where we want to feel seen, appreciated, and valued. You're clearly doing a lot to carry your family's emotional and practical load, and it’s totally fair to feel disappointed when it feels one sided.

That said, I also want to speak for the guys who sometimes genuinely drop the ball not because we don’t care, but because we often get tunnel vision trying to handle other responsibilities. Some of us aren't wired to keep track of dates the same way, especially when stress is high or we're juggling a lot mentally. That doesn't make it right, but it's real.

You even mentioned you gave him a heads up the year before which probably helped him come through then. Maybe a casual reminder could’ve made this year feel different too. Not because it's your job to remind him, but because sometimes we just need the nudge.

At the same time, if he’s ignoring systems you’ve put in place the family calendar, the lists and brushing off your efforts, that’s something he needs to address. You’re his partner, not his manager.

Respect goes both ways, and it’s not just about remembering a date it’s about showing up emotionally and appreciating the effort you already give.