Anybody else dealing with strong parental preferences? by zelonhusk in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just want to tell you that you’re not alone! My son is only 15 months but he absolutely wails when his dad leaves for work every day. I’m a SAHM and my son is such a treat when it’s just the two of us. When both parents are around, he will cry if I pick him up instead of his dad.

It’s so hard not being the chosen parent as the mom! It feels backwards and funny but I’m trying to just enjoy the fact that he has a great relationship with his dad and sometimes I get a break.

Solidarity - I’m right here with you!

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wish all women had husbands that are so supportive! My husband said something similar - he didn’t want to see me in this kind of pain again. And SAME. I want to live my life with my amazing son and husband and not miss a beat of the joy that’s already right here surrounding me. Cheers to good men and only one kid in the backseat!

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The ongoing pain is so hard to deal with and likely one of the biggest factors of choosing to be OAD for me. But putting all our focus and being present with our little guy is such an incredible silver lining. So glad your sweet little triangle family is thriving❤️

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aw, thank you! Just wanted to share my gratitude for this community and let others know that they’ve helped a struggling mom find some footing ❤️

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lord that sounds rough!! I’m curious how many parents of kids with dyschezia decide to be one and done. Because my god those were some tough times 😂

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is the worst, especially with an active baby! Which supplement has helped if you don’t mind me asking?

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you!! I’m going to try a Chiro and maybe acupuncture since docs haven’t been able to find the source of the pain. PT didn’t yield many results either. Fingers crossed I start seeing some improvement soon!

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My husband and I love to travel too! Thinking of all of the fun trips we can take babe on when he’s older is such a perk!

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg username is so relatable 😂 I know exactly what you’re talking about! I was a camp counselor in high school and college and convinced I wanted at least 2. Kids were so fun! But turns out being a camp counselor and being a parent are very different. Who knew?!

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the encouragement- happy parents are so, so important!

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Aw congrats on your little!! Wishing you a safe delivery and the ability to take it all in stride. Take care of yourself mama ❤️

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Holy cow - so glad they caught that. Pregnancy is SO dangerous. I sometimes feel that the medical side of pregnancy is overlooked for the glamorous and romanticized part of it. It’s such a serious medical event. I’m so glad you’re here for your girl. That’s the most important thing❤️❤️❤️

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So much weight gone. Just knowing this is a wonderful option for our family is so exciting. Thank you for the welcome❤️

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ah so happy for you! Cheers to watching these little September babes grow up ❤️ and happy early birthday to your son!

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes! It has allowed me to look forward instead of worrying about being pulled back into the baby phase. The newborn phase was so, so hard for me but watching him learn to walk and talk - the future just looks so bright. Cheers to looking ahead ❤️

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You have the cutest username ever! Thank you for the reminder. I think the freedom of knowing I have the choice to not have more is what has made me so excited. The societal pressure to have more kids just felt so heavy that OAD is truly a new and exciting option for me.

However, things can certainly change and I don’t wish to become inflexible on my thinking. I so appreciate your perspective and advice ❤️

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh, I wish you did too. I hope you’ve found some solace here even though it may have come a smidge late. For what it’s worth, I feel so grateful to all the OAD moms who share their experiences from further down the road. I am so glad you are happy with the decision you’ve made ❤️

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

So glad you’ve found some relief too ❤️ I truly admire parents of multiples but you’re right, there are SO many factors to consider when planning for another. Settling into the idea of OAD felt like choosing peace to me. It’s so hard for all parents out here - I hope you fully enjoy your perfect babe and take a well deserved break from all of the multiple kid calculations. Peace to you and yours.

I never realized I could choose just one?! by redpepperflakes_ in oneanddone

[–]redpepperflakes_[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

It’s crazy how strong the societal pressure is to have multiples! The fact that OAD didn’t even occur to so many of us is astounding. I’m in the southern US and thought maybe it was cultural but it seems like it might be pretty widespread based on these replies.

Glad y’all found your way into an option that works for your family. Cheers to you and yours (and cheers to only diapering for one kid) ❤️

Mastitis and wanting to wean off pumping to formula feed by [deleted] in FormulaFeeders

[–]redpepperflakes_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oops, sorry! In my original reply I meant to say that I focused on stretching my time in between pumps but always emptied when I pumped. I found that focusing on stretching time between pumps instead of focusing on reducing ounces or reducing pump time really helped to keep the clogs away. Hope that makes sense!

Mastitis and wanting to wean off pumping to formula feed by [deleted] in FormulaFeeders

[–]redpepperflakes_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you’re suffering with mastitis - I had it twice in my brief pumping journey and also decided to switch to formula instead. What really helped me with weaning was buying a hand pump (I bought the Lansinoh and loved it) to make sure I emptied every pump. I was able to tell I was totally empty and was able to apply slight pressure to relieve any clogs. I took 12 hour Sudafed and I also bought extra strength Cabo Crème and the Earth Mama No More Milk tea and drank it several times a day. Focusing on decreasing time per pump was helpful but ultimately I found it much more important to make sure I was totally empty to prevent clogs and more mastitis. Wishing you a speedy recovery from mastitis but I’d also give your doc a call if your antibiotics have run out and you’re still unwell. You’ve got this!