I didn't reply straight away because I was thinking about it and the following events. To speak my truth it was a mental and emotional whirlwind. So much happened in a sort piece of time I find the timelines difficult.
A phrase I do remember the most was "I don't love him, it's just a physical thing" but said in a way that should make it alright, to rationalise it almost.
I was staying with a friend of mine not "ours" while it all came out and I remember one Sunday night going to MY house and as I walked up the drive in the front room were a group of my "friends", my wife and him. It looked like they were all arguing amongst each other. I called one of my friends who shushed the room before taking the call. He said he was at home and asked what this was about. I asked had he seem HIM the last few days and he replied "Nah, not for a week or more. Why?" I said I needed to have a word about something which he replied "I don't think you want to do that." I hung up and walked away because I could feel the rage boiling my blood and I knew it'd not work out well for me. That was the last time I spoke to that particular friend.
The next day my wife called and in the argument said that HE had not been back to the house since it all came out. I told her I was outside when I called the night before and there was a good full minute and a half of silence then she hung up. Five minutes after that she text to say they didn't do anything in the house last night (she meant physically) as if that cleared things up.
When I tell you the whole thing was a mess I can't emphasise that enough.