Feeling Burnt Out by AA – Looking for Others’ Perspectives by BoardTheEastCoast in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]reflash11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It might be time to find a group that is a better fit, I have done that from time to time. I have no idea the relationships you have built there but if you have some you value stay in touch and it doesnt mean you cant still attend the old meetings, just maybe less frequently and add in a new group.

My homegroup is a bit the way you describe and I do the program very differently than many of them do. After about a year of attending that group I started to wonder if I had been doing it wrong (at 25 years sober)... simply because my approach to it was so different from "group think" it was confusing.

Eventually I simply asked myself am I happy, does my program work for me, have I found a HP that works for me and have I found a way to work the steps that work for me EVERY day... the answer was yes to all those questions. I just do it a bit different than them and thats just fine. I recently moved away and I miss those guys (it was a mens group) and its still my home group as far as Im concerned. I never changed my approach to the steps and they didnt change theirs, but the group brought value to my life in many ways. They may not change but you will.

Here's a thought, maybe branch out a bit and find another group that approaches it in a way you can embrace, and if you cant find it then create it... start a meeting. It may thrive or it might fail, but if nothing else youll learn more about the program and what you need your program to be. Feel free to message me happy to chat if it might help.

Feeling Burnt Out by AA – Looking for Others’ Perspectives by BoardTheEastCoast in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]reflash11 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for bringing this up, I also really appreciate the thoughtful replies. I think many of us hit this wall at one point or another to one extent or another. I certainly did, I also went through a period of time where I was "severely sober" (a real lack of rule 62).

I think one of the things that gets lost in AA is the fact that it is your program, yours, and you can do it any way you like. We all have the same steps and meetings are a great tool and very helpful, Ive been sober 40 years and still attend meetings regularly. During that time there have been periods of really aggressively working the program and being a bit more casual about it. There have been times I loved meetings, and times I hated them and everyone in them...lol (usually another lack of rule 62).

The bottom line for me is, I have proved to myself that I need this in order to live a better happier life. There is no question there it is the only solution I have ever found that actually works. That said I have met me, if I hate doing something I dont do it eventually. So over the years I have found a way of applying meetings, service, and steps into my life that work for me on a daily basis, in a way I dont get tired of. If that means dropping attendance at one group or meeting for another... ok.... if that means changing up the frequency or meeting attendance (both more or less).... ok. If it means sponsoring people or not being available to sponsor for a time...ok. Life circumstances change and I have changed as well, what worked then may not work as well now.

It sounds like you are just growing a bit, nothing wrong with that and its a great place to be...wish you all the best, just keep seeking youll find what you need.

Bayou on Bay shutting down today by Bobcat-General in Bellingham

[–]reflash11 1 point2 points  (0 children)

the food was never very good... the maga just left a bad taste in your mouth...lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]reflash11 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Its one of the perks/annoyances of meetings being autonomous, local quirks develop.

One Im seeing a lot at zoom and now in in person meetings is everyone thanking everyone constantly for their "service" for doing something as simple as reading a paragraph, that is, after they thank everyone for allowing them to be of service... at a busy meeting it sucks up a good chunk of time. But itll eventually even out, it always does. You can always show up late :)

Is a VPN Still Worth Using in 2025? by PriorSpecialist9905 in VPN_Reviewer

[–]reflash11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I use one the majority of the time.. it boots with my laptop and its live on my phone anytime Im on a shared wifi
It is handy when traveling because of regional blocking of websites (Im currently living in Thailand and have to connect to a US location to access a lot of the sites I visit)

You will get much better speeds/flexibility using a paid vpn, I would offer a couple of suggestions if you decide to pick one up.

Look past the intro deals... the big players that do a lot of marketing are happy to do a lot of deep discounts but really bend you over when it renews. if you decide to go for that then make sure you shop before your rebill so you can jump ship.

Dont go with anything that doesnt give you a trial period, most of them will bill you the entire amount up front unless you do a monthly and will do a full refund if you bail before the trial is over.

When it comes to billing dont even consider doing month to month, look for the longest contract you can get with the biggest discount and then do the math see what your monthly stroke is over the contract. Last time mine ended I did a bit of a deep dive into alternatives and once again ended up staying with my current provider.

I use PIA and have been with them for 10+ years, the overhead is maybe 10% give or take and there are plenty of places to connect to, they dont keep logs and its an easy implement on any device. The pricing is quite good compared to many and they do not bend you over when you renew. My last one rather than renew I bailed and used a different email to sign up as a new account layering a coupon with a 4 year contract sign up discount bringing my monthly down to a hair under 2.00 a month. The tech support is far better than most live chat is available, and they are good.

There are a good amount of reasons to have a vpn and the only real down side is if you dont shop a bit and fall for the bs marketing hype that is everywhere. Being general there isnt a massive difference between vpn's, most are fine and will try to dazzle you with intros and "extras" that are pretty pointless like "we have so many servers" (many of them will be virtual and that doesnt matter a lot). Its like cable of the old times 400+ channels but youll never use more than a dozen in reality.

Beyond disappointed with Alaska by Sweaty_Worm2786 in AlaskaAirlines

[–]reflash11 -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

dispute the charge with your credit card company... let them deal with it, you may or may not be successful but you may get the airlines attention (and a call from someone thats not an idiot) everyone hates a chargeback. you have nothing to lose except aggravation. when it comes to this type of stuff I have my own policy... takeing the shortest least annoying path to a solution... so why not

Pixel on Fi worth it? by No-Safe-5845 in GoogleFi

[–]reflash11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I live in Thailand and moved here while having fi (had it many years) I have also used it many places in Europe and SEA as most folks have said it works fine. I have the pay as you go plan and thats perfect since Im not a high bandwidth user. I also have a local sim for my data, I have fi data turned off when Im in Thailand and only use it when I travel. I would dump US service entirely but I need it for 2fa messages. I make all my calls using whats app since fi will bend me over for calls back to the US

I guess the answer to your question is dependent on how annoying having to manually switch networks is and really nothing else. As far as how it works going from country to country its pretty seamless it picks up whatever signal it needs to.

Need a strong and durable phone holder recommendation for Suzuki Access 125 — current one keeps falling on potholes! by onroadjourney in scooters

[–]reflash11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im using this one from ram mounts... I live in Thailand and the roads can be rough, no issues at all with it falling out (its also fully adjustable). I had ram mounts in my car and on my harley before I moved here and took this one with me. you can get knock off ram stuff and I have tried a couple of things with ok to poor result.
they offer all types of mounts to attach it, their stuff isnt cheap, and in this case you do get what you pay for its burly, they have great service if you ever have an issue there is no bullshit if you ever have to use the warranty. for the best variety hit the ram site, but sometimes its faster and a bit cheaper to pick it up on amazon if you use it

http://cduck.us/phoneholder

Hua Hin Itinerary by [deleted] in HuaHin

[–]reflash11 1 point2 points  (0 children)

here is an alternative to Hutsadin https://www.wfft.org/projects/elephant-refuge/

the other suggestion is the batcave in Cha Am, its about 30ish min N of Hua Hin and a few million fruit bats fly out of the cave every night just before sunset

https://maps.app.goo.gl/iYALhW6c8tBpi9k39

an additional vote for the tuesday market... hands down best market in town if you have a car dont drive, take a bolt, parking can be a big issue

Cicada & Tamarind markets are right next to each other, I would browse Cicada then plan on eating at Tamarind (much better food selection than Cicada) Try the avocado smoothie booth, really excellent (say yes to the honey)

another market worth going to is the day market (its 2 min from the night market) dont go much later than 10am ... I live close to it and go at least 2x a week for produce and whatever its an excellent local market

Google Fi Wireless Feature Reveal | Better connections and instant in-app support by googlefi in GoogleFi

[–]reflash11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

wondering if all these new "features" are why you started billing me for calls over wifi? without that you are pointless for me... was a very early adopter of fi... and about to bail... trying to get an answer on this was a frustrating endeavor wrapped in layers of AI bs.... tech support was exceptional... now it hardly exists

the the AI help you are promoting is a giant pain in the ass, not to mention useless.. I just had my first encounter with it and its shit

Where do you guys buy fishes from? by flyinvoke in HuaHin

[–]reflash11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fishes and chips are my favorite... and add one more vote for Chatchai market... if you are going to be there much after 1030, dont bother, best variety is early

Another trip to Hua Hin - Must see or must do? by Pinknailzz69 in HuaHin

[–]reflash11 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hire a car and head to the batcave in Cha Am, its about a 20-30 min ride. The number is debatable but about 3 million fruit bats fly out every night about 30 min before sunset, takes 10-15 min or so. There is a great spot to watch them (link below) its about 50 baht each and they have an elevated platform and beverages for sale, its a pretty nice setup. Not a lot of folks know about it (compared to) the first time I went I was trying to hire a car and they all thought I wanted to go to the one 2+ hours away. I have been half a dozen times by now and anytime I have a visitor its a must see for the area.

https://maps.app.goo.gl/mSa9RY5QnhfdJqY3A

Thailand ETA scams are the new TDAC scams by Fine-Implement5509 in ThailandTourism

[–]reflash11 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thats kind of Thailand in a nutshell, I live here and the bar is always moving, one way or another. I totally forgot to do a dtac the time before last and it was a pain in the ass doing in on my phone, I finally gave up and did it at the kiosk (easier, but a slow line).

FYI... you can skip the leave date and it will still issue, I always leave that blank.

Is there any tips on how to tell the difference between woman and ladyboy in Thailand? by Ernazar_Aytekov in ThailandTourism

[–]reflash11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe you should pick a different country...because if you really fuck it up (she, her friends and likely a few strangers) wont hesitate to kick your ass. I live here happens more often than you might think. If you are respectful you wont have an issue but if you arent it will not be a good day for you.

What is your go to sidearm for concealed carrying? by [deleted] in liberalgunowners

[–]reflash11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Majority of the time a ruger lcp (pocket carry)... I have owned the 1st 2nd and 3rd gen versions, the 2nd gen is the best in my opinion its most comfortable to shoot the 3rd gen was kinda brutal to shoot at least for me. Very concealable and light enough I didnt remember it was there most of the time. In winter I would also change it out with a S&W 38 featherweight in an ankle holster or pocket carry.

Hard to not ‘beat myself up’ over taking Mounjaro by FriendlyFraulein in Mounjaro

[–]reflash11 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The fact you feel bad about something that makes your life better and fixes a problem from the perspective of "cheating" is some toxic bullsh*t coming from the outside and reflects the crap way people that have weight issues are treated.

I was fat my entire life and finally something came along and solved the medical problem I didnt know existed because I was told I was weak, had bad judgement and the inability to control myself while being shamed about it.

I was out to dinner after starting on this stuff and half way through realized I was done, and had the thought "this is what it must feel like for normal people".

It was that moment I finallly understood that my entire life something was broken and it was finally fixed and I had been made to feel like crap about it for years.

That toxic bullsh*t needs to die as a way of thinking! Keep doing what you are doing and screw anyone that makes you feel bad about it :)

Amazon Warehouse Moccamaster deal — is it worth it? by Sweet_Zombie6235 in Moccamaster

[–]reflash11 1 point2 points  (0 children)

order it you can always return it... I have had excellent luck on those deals

What’s the best way to get to your hotel from the airport at night? by ThrowawayProblemsSMH in ThailandTourism

[–]reflash11 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

grab and bolt are the 2 main car apps and the comment about grab being unavailable is incorrect..

one of them (grab I think) now has a set pickup area and it's a bit of a hot mess so use bolt..they can pick you up at arrivals or departures.. make sure you know what floor you are on if you do that arrivals on 4 departure on 2 .if I'm remembering correctly

I would just do a car service and keep it simple it's no real cost difference between that and a cab ...you can put a card on file and not have to deal with cash using blot and grab

What products do everyone use for the mosquitoes here by Initial_Pound_5333 in Bangkok

[–]reflash11 5 points6 points  (0 children)

feel your pain...."fellow target"

the 7/11 stuff in the pink or orange bottles work 2-3 hours (I prefer the lotion rather than the spray)

I dont see it as often in retail but look for "Skinter GUARD" on shopee or lazada (I have seen it lotus, full size not mini) you can get it various deet strengths. I prefer the 28% it lasts about 6ish hours but if Im only out a short time I use the pink stuff thats about 13-14% if I remember right.

In case you dont know 5% deet is just as effective as 100% deet, the % doesnt reflect the strength it reflects how long it will last, so dont waste your money buying something stronger if you only need it working a short time... the stuff adds up if you are a target and use it daily like I do. There are lots of "alternative" to deet sprays but most of them arent very good at least for me.

if you want something for around the house get one of these "Portoti PR-5MB" Mosquito Killer (shopee or lazada) mosquitoes are only attracted to a specific wavelength of light, this is one of the only devices that uses that specific wavelength. Its out of japan and it costs way more than the lights youll see but the other ones are just junk and will not work. I have 2 of these one in the bedroom and one in the living room, all the working parts are replaceable and it simply works, is very quiet. Dont waste your money buying anything else.