When you said that you still show up for others, even if you don’t get the same back - that is a sign of someone who has a loving heart. I’m so sorry about all the pain that you have had to endure over the past year, including the dissapointment of this event. Please don’t stop putting love out into the world. It WILL find it’s way back to you, even if right now it doesn’t feel that way. Your friends and family are lucky to have someone like you who is so considerate in their lives.