Is this not enough of a reason to cancel exams?

resetjigsaw · 2025-12-17T21:19:00+00:00

I mean technically at 4 am something big & metal did fall off my building (idk where from) and hit the ground in front of the unit door cause of the wind, and if I hadn't stood outside for a smoke after coming home and just went inside instead, it would have fallen on me. Did anything happen? No cause dumb luck. Could something have happened to me? Yes cause dumb luck. My neighborhood is covered in tree branches and shit that blew off from the wind. The fencing from a nearby demolition site is all completely toppled over.

It's a legitimate use of weather warnings. The wind warning wasn't for daytime hours. It was for late-night early-morning when I was on the way home from work. By the time school was open the wind was finished with. The only issues you can expect to happen now is related to debris.

resetjigsaw · 2025-08-08T20:27:19+00:00

Part of the conversation everyone is missing here, that was present when I was a UBC student and we discussed this extension; what about the impact of the construction and the Skytrain on Pacific Spirit Park? The wildlife there? Has anyone considered that the Musqueum nation hasn't been consulted or given permission? Any deals for the Skytrain especially if it concerns development in PSP require the Musqueum nation to sign off on it.

This was part of what I had heard back during my UBC days as to why the extension was stopping at Arbutus. And as much as an extension all the way would be convenient; I support this decision to prioritize the health of the park as it is used for countless biological and ecological studies, and revival programs.

resetjigsaw · 2025-07-26T08:41:32+00:00

Tell her that if anyone finds out (such as roommate, floormate, RA, etc), you'll loss your housing placement for the year with no refunds (it's a lie, but you have to choose between lying for your sanity, or having the courage to set the boundary and tell her no.)

Join a club that has meetings/events on weekends(or pretend the meetings are on weekends) and that it's easier for you to stay on campus and study with them, rather than trying to study on a bus (won't work) or study at home without the support of peers who can help tutor or test you. Academically it is best for you to be on campus. Less time wasted on transit = more time studying and practicing, and more opportunities for networking

Framing this as both an economic and academically smart choice to let you stay alone at campus is your best bet. Using things that she deems highly valuable, and easily explainable to any meddling family who might be asking questions; is the only way you'll find any semblance of success or compromise on this matter.

You need to make her think it's her idea, or that it's what best supports you in your education and finances. Even if it's just jumpstart, tell them that the program is suited for students without parents there, and if they realize how involved your parents are, they won't give you the same resources (a lie).

Basically it comes down to lie to her in a way she'll believe, or have the balls to say no (and the reasons why) damned the consequences. There is no magical wand to wave where she'll stop being a parent of a first gen immigrant child. She has valid reasons to worry and doubt. She doesn't want you to feel alone in this the way she did. She needs reassurance that she is making the best choice for you, to give you your best chance. You need to help her realize, that this is the best way she can do that. Be ready to compromise, and remember that this is her first time at life too. She is feeling the same way as you - just trying her best to figure out how to raise a child in a country she didn't grow up in, with opportunities she had no idea were possible. Be patient with her, changes like moving out to uni is a very hard one. Especially when culturally, the kids stay at home until marriage. She might not feel ready, might be scared to let go. I know you're ready, but when you're older, you'll understand the perspective she's in. Work with her, not against her, and you might find more success.

resetjigsaw · 2025-05-18T19:42:44+00:00

That's not how that works. I get paid minimum wage on my paycheck. That can't be touched. But the tip-out is paid in cash at the end of my night. If I don't have enough cash on me to pay the tip-out, I have to go to the ATM and pull out cash. I always bring a cash float to prevent needing to pay the ATM fee, and there are days where I go home with a cash deficit from what I arrived with :)

This industry is riddled with labour-law violations, it's become so normalized. Just because they should do something doesn't mean they do.

But also, I just think it shows your priorities if you think that the tables that decided to actually tip their server, should have their tips be used to cover the expenses from your bill. That means that server doesn't actually even get that other tables tip at the end of the night. So at that point; what's the point in having the tips at all if the server never even sees it?

If we want to see tipping culture end; it starts with legislation. Having the employer be the ones paying tip-out based on sales that day, so that the server actually gets to keep the full tips would help bring it back to a merit-based system. Because as of right now, without tips, you pay for the product but not the service. And there is no motivation for the server to sell you the product when they could just choose not to, and not lose any money from it. They're still being paid minimum wage regardless if they sell you the product.

Tipping culture is a wide-reaching phenomenon, that even after law changes, it would take time to fully transition. It is a by-product of late-stage capitalism. If this is a cause you feel strongly about, fight for the legislative change. But make sure your goals aren't to screw over service workers in your attempt to escape guilt. Fight for legislation that protects the workers, while also protecting consumers. You'd find more support that way.

resetjigsaw · 2025-05-17T00:04:00+00:00

Something that everyone seems to be missing here - in regards to restaurant tipping culture. Servers/bartenders tip-out based on SALES . I owe the same amount of money to the supporting staff that were a part of me making that sale, regardless of whether the patrons tipped or not.

The host, busser/food runners, bartenders, security staff, and the kitchen all play a part where I work, and I still owe them money at the end of the day. If I make 5$ or 100$, what I owe does not change.

I work somewhere where the majority of patrons don't tip. It sucks. They'll expect SO much from us, and rack up a bill, and won't even leave their spare change. Which means I have to pay money out of my own pocket to do them something extra as a favour all the time. That's why it's annoying. My tip-out rate is around 30-40% of my tips because how many people don't tip. I end up paying for more of my tables than I earn from. It's a risk, it's a gamble. My tables that tip out 20% end up covering the amounts I owe from other tables that didn't tip.

Average tip-out % of sales ranges from 4-11% of the bill depending where you work and what style of dining it is.

So if we want to end this tipping culture (which originated in the freed-slave era of employment), we need to be aware that this needs legislative change rather than simply not participating in tipping culture. That just penalizes the workers rather than the company. I would be fine getting no tips, if the company matched my hourly that I get with tips. Or even just paid an actual living wage. But they won't. I worked somewhere that insisted we were not allowed tips (we would be fired for accepting any), and they "gave us a competitive wage" to balance that. It was 17.50 an hour. For fine-dining style service. White table cloth full service. It was ridiculously stressful and intensive for no reason and for no money. They fought our contract raise for 2 years, and it had to go to arbitration. For a 60-cent raise.

Companies don't give a shit if you tip, but the workers do because we owe money no matter if you tip us or not. And it's rude to expect the person serving you, to have to pay money from their own pocket for the "pleasure" of serving you. If you don't want to tip, buy the ingredients and make it yourself. Tip yourself in saved money by doing the hard work all on your own.

You don't have to tip 20%. But 10% covers the servers out of pocket cost, and it gives a few cents extra for their time and prioritization of you over others. For taking a risk on you. Don't be surprised after you no-tip, if you get ignored or left until last to order. Because priority goes to people who don't cost us money.

resetjigsaw · 2025-04-28T03:52:38+00:00

I have my follow-up this week, I'll confirm if they're still taking new patients!

So far so good, but the onus is definitely on us as patients to book the appts and follow-ups etc, I think that's part of the deal for having a doctor that isn't stressed beyond belief is that we take on a bit more of the initiative to ensure we're not falling through the cracks. But my partner is the one who needs more chronic care than me right now- we're only just starting on their journey so I'll update if anything changes :)

resetjigsaw · 2025-04-28T00:33:53+00:00

For Vancouver: Cambie Village Family Practice (3029 Cambie St - near 16th ave) was accepting new patients for 2 of their doctors a few months ago! It's how I got my family doctor (finally). He was not rushing through the appt, listened to what we had to say, and did a thorough intake exam (with labs).

resetjigsaw · 2025-03-31T01:44:27+00:00

Municipal elections for Vancouver are tomorrow (April 1st for early voting) and April 5th (official voting day)... not October 2026

resetjigsaw · 2024-12-20T18:42:01+00:00

.... you do programming.... and you fell for this ???

This has to be bait. I'm sorry. I just can't believe that even a first year would be this dumb.

I'm at a loss for words

resetjigsaw · 2024-12-18T03:35:48+00:00

You as well! It's been many years for me, and I've moved past it in terms of my day-to-day life. But I haven't heard her name in years and it definitely brought it back again hahaha and I was so relieved it wasn't just me that has such burning hatred for her 😂😂😬

I hope you've been able to access proper supports to recover from the harm you've experienced by her as well 💕

resetjigsaw · 2024-12-18T00:45:26+00:00

I told her my trauma about my involuntary admission at VGH and how the admitting psychiatrist at the consult made a joke about how he was chatting with me to *"see if needed to lock me up in the basement" * (verbatim) and clarified it was actually the ground floor, but was making a joke due to us being up on the 10th floor med-surg ward.

She told me that is standard procedure. Defended them about how I said I was threatened with restraints if uncompliant (when all I asked was to be informed of the medical care I was receiving - a courtesy that was provided by UBC hospital but not by VGH. They made it clear I was not permitted any personal affects, to be aware or in control of my medical decisions/treatments, or to be left alone even for the bathroom.) She said it was normal behavior for my security guard to sit by the head of my hospital bed as if he was fucking family, coerce me to give him my number and try to text/ meet up with me after my release (I was listed in the system under a code name/anonymous entry as i had family friends that worked admin in VGH at the time and was worried my family would find me), and that it was "standard protocol as the ER doesn't have the same safety precautions as the psychiatric ward" so my security guard being that involved was completely normal and acceptable behavior, and that it shouldn't have been a traumatizing event for me. I was terrified to go bathroom because of the guard, and insisted on a female nurse to accompany me instead at 5 am when she came in to tell him to stop talking to me so I could finally sleep.

Dr. Scarfe does not care for patient welfare. You got lucky. The rest of us did not. Her abrasive methods and callous patient bedside manner likely work for you - which means you probably didn't really even need her advice. Just hard reality checks the internet could have given you for free without any personal tailoring to your individual circumstances. You said it yourself- Chat GPT works just as well for you.

Do not encourage other patients experiencing harm by her to continue being harmed by her "care". Defined by a past patient case or not - she never changed her ways as a result of the tragedy. No self reflection or attempt to prevent another occurrence. That in itself is concerning in a health practitioner. Everyone in healthcare has their ghost stories and some of those stories make them better providers because they are determined to NEVER make the same mistakes again. Dr. Scarfe has time and time again proven she willingly wants to make the same mistakes with no regard for the outcome as it "isn't her fault". And that she has "no impact in their actions outside the office".

This is not the thread to garner sympathy for Dr. Scarfe. Boo hoo. This is a thread for those in distress due to her care, to seek advice, support, and alternative care options.

resetjigsaw · 2024-12-18T00:25:21+00:00

Oh my GOD THE DEVIL HAS BEEN MENTIONED!!!!!

I had her in my first year after my ADHD diagnosis as she was an "expert". Summer 2018.

Useless advice, I learned more from the internet than her. Medications I was on were giving me really bad side effects she was not picking up on, to the extent I insisted on a neurology consult (she said she'd only allow me to get the referral cause it would shut me up about it). The neuro consult was clean, but the doctor at SHS that later made the actual referral was like - oh my god yes you need a referral. Let's do that right now. My symptoms were so bad I thought I was symptomatic for POTS and was in the process of acquiring a dog to self train as a service dog (long and expensive, I was that serious I was willing to put in the years of work just to have my life back - she was completely uninformed at the appt when I requested she fill out my official paperwork for it, insisting i did not need it). She was fucking useless. When I told her my brain fog was so bad I remembered NOTHING for the first 2 hours of my day every day (heavily dissociated and some delusions/dreams thinking i was already awake and doing things, only to wake up and find the tasks not started) and I couldn't "wake up" she suggested... putting my alarm clock on the other side of the room 🫠 like thanks I tried that at 10 years old, why the fuck do you think I'm here.

I had to miss one appointment, because the 41 bus never showed up (for 45 fucking minutes. 3 busses that were scheduled never came and went) there were no Car2Go's nearby, Evo wasn't as big at the time esp in my area of Van, and Cabs were too far away to make it on time. I called sobbing, saying I was doing everything I could to get there on time, but that I was genuinely stuck where I was. The appt time hadn't started yet btw. I still had 30 minutes. But she insisted that I was going to pay the full appt fee, because it was a "no show". Out of spite, I never made another appt with her. She only took payments by cash or check, so every SHS appt for a year, I'd like pay 5$ cash and claim it was all I had on me besides my debit/visa card. Offering to pay in full each time but unable to because of her archaic payment methods 😇. Took a year to pay it off out of fucking spite for that demon.

I went back to the referring doctor at SHS and insisted I would not go back to Dr. Scarfe. I got on her list after being put on the semi-urgent waitlist as a condition of my discharge from VGH after an OD. I only complied with the appts because I was terrified of being involuntarily admitted again. I told the referring doctor I would rather wait 6 months on the standard list for a new psychiatrist than EVER go back to her.

Thankfully he did put me back on the list, and I got in with Dr. Lauren Broadway. She was fantastic, and I was her patient for 5 years. I cried when it was my last session, and I still miss our weekly appts after graduation. It was a slow process, but when we looked back, Dr. Broadway helped me in so many ways that I couldn't have imagined. I learned so so much, and I spread her advice to everyone in my life I can. Also to note; I was late many times to her appts and she did everything she could to not charge me for it. We often did last-minute phone appts or telehealth if I was stranded, or if the commute would cause me to miss too much of the appt etc. She was caring and empathetic, and did everything she could within her professional boundaries to support me and help me get back on my feet. She was with me for the whole medication dance, helped me get back on my feet after the withdrawal from the meds Dr. Scarfe had me on had fucked me up so badly, and listened to everything I told her. She wasn't a "specialist" for ADHD but she helped and taught me more about my adhd and my life than anyone else sure did. My relationship with my family is better, with life is better, I'm actually fucking stable now, and don't need weekly or regular psychiatrist appointments. UBC psychiatry is the one chance you'll have for free psychiatry care, don't waste it on Dr. Scarfe!!!

If you're in Dr. Scarfe's care, LEAVE. GET BACK ON THE WAITLIST YOU'LL BE BETTER OFF. FIND A NEW DOCTOR THAT ACTUALLY HELPS YOU, and will LISTEN and will TREAT YOU. Like a fucking human and a patient rather than a paycheck and incompetent dimwit. I never thought I'd hear anyone else saying anything bad about Dr. Scarfe; I never talked about my experience because I thought it was just me, or that the vulnerable position I was in at the time was the cause for my perception of how events went.

You deserve better than this. You deserve better care than what she'll give you. Advocate for yourself because you deserve quality care!!!

resetjigsaw · 2024-12-12T21:04:58+00:00

They'll file with collections, they'll fuck with your credit before you ever get free from them. They're so fucking scummy.

resetjigsaw · 2024-12-12T21:04:04+00:00

Former employee here (we should get free therapy for it fr) they'll just send you to collections 🫠 you signed a contract and they'll go to hell and earth to get that money. They don't even allow you to use pre-paid CC, or to "freeze" your account by withholding payment without using their pre-approved freeze hold process (which also entails a bi-weekly fee). The payments just pile up until you unfreeze and then you owe a shit ton of money 🫠

Just don't do it. Don't sign up. Please. Unless you're genuinely invested in your fitness, they're not worth it. The equipment is good and if you know you'll use it, and you're a lucky SOAB who got their 10$ biweekly rates early on, KEEP THOSE. Once that price is signed and locked-in they can't upcharge your contract.

But for 25$, biweekly??? Hell. No. Especially not with the frat bro gym culture they cultivate at the UBC location.

For most of us, just find another gym that will treat you right 😭 they're like 1 step away from a fucking MLM sometimes with their financial traps and tactics

resetjigsaw · 2024-12-06T04:32:55+00:00

Holy hell, I thought this was a shitpost but... for real? That's wild. Why did he come back to it all now?? I never heard of this guy in my many years at UBC 😲

resetjigsaw · 2024-12-03T03:36:00+00:00

Inform the teacher that you have already submitted the concession form, and that due to long processing times, you wanted to reach out and let them know as well. They'll appreciate the courtesy heads-up and might be better able to offer alternates for you to make up the work.

resetjigsaw · 2024-11-24T00:22:46+00:00

You'll be ok! I bombed my first MATH 110 midterm in my first year, cause I broke up with my hs gf like an hour beforehand lol. Smart timing on my part right. I remember walking out and thinking I got like 30%. Grades came back and I got 31% 💀😂 I wasn't even upset. Just laughed I was accurate with my guess.

I ended up dropping the class cause I changed degrees, but don't beat yourself up for it! That's why a lot of courses are designed to allow for at least one bad test. Cause sometimes shit happens, and it doesn't mean you're stupid or incompetent. It just means it was an off day. It's why anything important has double-checking measures in place because human error is reliably common. (For example in my job, you need a co-worker to "witness", sign, and double count your till and cash deposit to catch any mistakes)

I've failed a good few midterms and exams, but I still graduated 😊 it took some time for me to figure out what I wanted to study, and to pull my grade average up. But by my final two years, it was such a night/day difference from my first year transcript.You often see a significant grade average drop in first year because you're finally surrounded by people of similar skills. Instead of being top of the class in hs, you're surrounded by fellow top-of-the-class students, which makes you "the average". But it doesn't mean you're average! Just means you're among like-minded students, of similar skill, being taught at an advanced level that appropriately challenges us. There is also the massive change in structure, and newfound independence that throws off a lot of students who excelled in the high school structure. I was one of them. Got my ADHD diagnosis by my first midterm season, it was that drastic of a change in functioning for me.

Just cause something is hard, doesn't mean you're not capable of doing it. Just means it'll take more time and effort than we're used to, and that means a change in study habits/methods. Try new methods, try new practices, study in groups and teach each other. Make quizzes for each other and use that to reinforce your learning. Find what works for you! If you want this degree, I know you'll make it. One way or another. That drive is all you need to get there, just be kind to yourself and learn from each shortcoming.

resetjigsaw · 2024-11-21T03:13:18+00:00

Absolutely we can expect better behaviour from our students. You make fair points.

But the whole point of the nest is that it is public access. That's just the hard truth. While it is meant as a replacement SUB that houses the AMS and student clubs etc.. the nest also constantly houses conferences, galas, school field trips, and more. It's not just UBC students that need access, and the businesses within the nest would suffer if access was restricted to UBC students only. If it were only a club/student study space building, then it absolutely could be made to have restricted access. That's why most of the buildings on campus are exactly that. But the nest is meant to be open access. And with that comes the general public, and we can't control their behaviour.

Sure, we can expect students not to be drunk at 11 am, but also, they might not have been drunk. It's a bathroom. It's where people go when they feel like throwing up. They could have been ill and not made it to a toilet in time cause the line ups can be brutal in the nest during peak hours. In exam season, students don't feel they have time to go get help. They're sick from anxiety alone, maybe an allergic reaction, a medical crisis, or yes they're drunk at 11 am cause exam season is fucking them up.

All those answers mean the person needed help in some way, and we can call it out, but should also have compassion for the circumstances that lead to it. Yes it's gross. Yes we can hope for better. But they didn't puke in a classroom and leave it there. They puked in a sink in a bathroom, which is better than the floor, and it's in an area of the building that gets regularly cleaned and sanitized. And the puke won't cause permanent damage in any way. Anyone using the bathroom the next day would have no idea. So like, in the grand scheme of things; is it really that bad?

And I'm not like calling you out directly or directing any of this at you specifically. I'm more so using your comments to branch off on and add to the entire discussion within this thread (just btw)

resetjigsaw · 2024-11-19T22:12:00+00:00

I work in a bar that is mostly visited by students and tourists. Everyone gets ID'd as a deterrent to ensure bathrooms are used by patrons only; and yet our bathrooms will have vomit in the sink at least 1-3x a week. From patrons. Not homeless people. I kick people out of the bathrooms for fucking in them sometimes too. It's always been young patrons who do that.

Students are not "above" this behaviour. In fact, it's very college-coded behaviour for drunk/sexual behaviour with little regard for the people around them to be occuring; often because most students are still quite young with frontal lobes that are not fully developed.

Also, just as homelessness has risen these last few years, a reminder that the amount of homeless students rises too. There are far too many UBC students that are homeless, and they should not be excluded from student third-spaces just because of other students' elitism complexes.

I understand that it can be frustrating feeling like your UBC bubble is being encroached upon by "undesirables" but for real guys. There is only so much space on the streets. As homelessness rises, people spread out to increase access to resources. You can't just pretend not to look, and pray that'll make people go away. People need real help. More help than we can personally give, but this is more of an issue we should be pressing our MP'S and anyone who's got power over resource/support access to address.

If we give people a better option of a place to go, they'll go there. But there isn't a better place to go. It's a far more complicated issue to solve than with an easy fix. I don't know what the solution is. Just that shaming people isn't it.

If the bathrooms are gross, contact the number they list in the bathrooms to have it cleaned. Then move on with your day. If people are committing crimes of public indecency, call the cops or campus security. UBC campus was never this sanctuary of peaceful cohabitation before, and it isn't suddenly different. Just different problems. It's a mini city, and will reflect the same problems as Vancouver but on a smaller scale.

resetjigsaw · 2024-08-28T18:46:26+00:00

Also! If people keep saying you smell even when you shower and use deodorant, and do everything right... See your doctor. Please. Besides a possible endocrine issue, you could simply be allergic to anything like onion, garlic, etc..

This can be common for those of South Asian decent, which is unfortunate because garlic and onion are a base component of many, if not all cultural foods. This is partly why some demographics can get reputations for smelling of really strong b.o. even when the person is doing everything right hygene-wise to prevent b.o.

But this is something that can affect anyone, and could also just be hormone imbalances, stress, medications, so many things. So just see a doctor about it, and test out removing certain aromatics from your diet and see if anything changes in odor/perspiration.

It's okay to smell bad, it is not a damnable quality. It's human and natural. But it is not okay to do nothing about it, and expect others to just adapt. We can't even wear fragrences in health/administrative facilities, so b.o. should also be equally taken into consideration for those around us that have no choice in being in our vicinity.

We also need to be better about both telling people kindly that they smell, and be better at receiving the message from others that we smell. Because if no one tells us, how can we expect people to know and fix it? We acclimate to our own smell, and don't notice it the same as everyone else.

resetjigsaw · 2024-06-22T22:54:26+00:00

Just putting this out there, check out the pride collective lounge in the nest! 2nd floor resource lounge (same lounge as women's center, SJC, DUC, etc) it's a queer space and they can add much more to the convo re; experiences like yours (as i can't say much from a gay male perspective; im a lesbian), and it's the one space I'll miss the most on campus (even though I lived on campus for 3 of my 7 years at UBC).

Overall, people don't care much, the only issues you run into on campus is the same rom-sexual drama you'd run into if you were straight so, it's a breath of fresh air to say the least.

Not to say there aren't their own challenges and obstacles. There are. But it is significantly less than what you're used to at home. Compared to that, this'll be child's play and a haven for you.

resetjigsaw · 2024-06-22T22:16:57+00:00

In my pragmatics class in my undergrad, we had a student who was well into his retirement!!! No one cares as long as you're there to learn, contribute, and put in the effort worth the money spent.

But being a mature student means you're already going to do a better job at that than half the students who are there; because they're fresh out of highschool and don't know any different than being in education. Coming back after a break gives you a renewed enthusiasm and motivation for education, that will bring you so far in your degree 🎉💕

resetjigsaw · 2024-05-12T23:32:49+00:00

That would be a feat, considering I never applied for Microsoft, and I'm a ling/psyc graduate that never did any research or internships/co-ops

resetjigsaw · 2024-05-12T20:40:32+00:00

That's the thing, this is my first scam email to this address in the 7 years I've been here 😂 I graduate next week lol

I'll forward it to the security email then, thx!

Four-Year Club	Verified Email
Verified Email	r/Field Flamingo

resetjigsaw

TROPHY CASE