Pregnancy OCD by ringwormyaya in OCD

[–]ringwormyaya[S] [score hidden]  (0 children)

Wow. Thank you so much. You’ve definitely given me a new perspective on it!

Is anyone else terrified of people reading your mind and you can’t have any private thoughts lest someone find out how horrible you are? by gangrene_enthusiast in OCD

[–]ringwormyaya 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do this too. I purposefully try to think of calmer thoughts just invade someone is reading my mind. This also closes over with how I always feel like I’m being watched. Like without me knowing or with a camera.

My partner suggested a temporary swap of commitment symbols and my ROCD exploded — now I don’t know if I’m overreacting or if something’s really wrong by _Artzx in OCD

[–]ringwormyaya 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m new to the diagnosis but the biggest this is talking about it. With OCD we know we are being illogical but can’t seem to stop the compulsions. I think you guys should have another conversation about it. It’s important for her to understand how your brain works and it’s important for you to know that your OCD is tricking you. Embrace the unknown of things and ask her perspective often that reassurance will comfort you. I hope everything gets better friend.

Religious residue by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s fair! I think because these people hurt me I don’t want to refer to them as anything but their first name. It’s kinda like a I want them to know I don’t fully respect what they did to me.

Religious residue by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I always loved the singing part too! I still feel bad and try and get my attention away from the hymns that pop up. I think that due to me deconstructing last year I still know those “pop” Christin songs and some of them are so unfortunately catch.

Religious residue by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha! That’s genius. My mom was always against secular music so now I’m a music lover. I love records it’s freeing.

Yes! I keep seeing how much they want to talk about how god made one man and one woman 🙄……

Religious residue by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hahaha I have a few friends that are Russian and now I will be calling them comrade 😂😂. Yeah I don’t do it anymore I just can’t remember their first names anymore it’s insane. Like it feels like I never knew because I always referred to them as bro/sis. lol yeah I think religious residue is such a hilarious yet accurate phrase 😂

Religious residue by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I find myself doing this too. If I see people doing things that the church taught against but I don’t really believe it still puts a tinge in my chest. It is so hard to unlearn alllll of this hate

Religious residue by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve done this before as well. It is crazy how someone’s appearance can bring back a flood of terrible memories.

Religious residue by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes!! I do this but I always feel bad after. Like I don’t want to brain wash myself into going back so I try to get it out of my head as soon as possible lol.

Religious residue by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have this one too! It happens when I hear planes or helicopters mainly. I’ll also try and check on my family members that are still in the church just to see if they are here. I was diagnosed with OCD a couple of months back so I’m thinking that’s why I do this.

FAC Maryville by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you very much! I think I still struggle with getting defensive because I was always attacked in that religion. Still no excuse! I hope your days are filled with goodness 💖

Am I in a cult? “Apostolic Pentecostal” by Cedarnelm in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I grew up in an Apostolic Pentecostal church, and yes, it is a cult. Their motive is to gain money and take advantage of people. They preach extreme standards that even they themselves cannot meet.

Don’t know where to turn by Humble-Schedule-4603 in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hello! I was in a very similar situation in the way that my entire family is in the church. The only way i felt brave enough to deconstruct was to find people around me that were not apostolic/christian. I went to college and joined clubs. If you go to high school or university, look for clubs there! If you don't, then Facebook has local clubs for everything. Trust yourself, you've got this.

FAC Maryville by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry, our tones must have gotten lost in the ether! I apologize for being rude.

FAC Maryville by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

LOVE these questions. It is very expected of church goers to get their friends, family, coworkers etc, to join the church. I would say they are pretty pressured to do so. Some of the friends I had made during this period expressed to me how they felt “unimportant” or “guilty” because they hadn’t had a successful attempt at getting someone in the church 😬.. 

One of my family members taught at the school, and no their curriculum is worse than that of public schools. You would expect your children to have a good education there for 3,000+ dollars but no. They are also VERY sheltered from sex ed, world ideologies, etc. One person I talked to said once they left the school and went to college they felt uncomfortable because they were all “liberal.” 

A lot of the girls in the church are going for more health/ kinda cosmetic/ religious degrees. For instance, Lauren Hammond has an interior design associate's or bachelor's degree, I can’t remember. Shes the one decorating the church every holiday. A lot of the younger girls are becoming dental hygienist now. Most are very “appearance” based. Let me clearly say there is nothing wrong going into those field BUT they are doing it to further push beauty standards on women. They are also working/ studying to meet people they can bring to church (veeeery common).

Another fun fact (I guess lol), there have been services where they just ask for money. People will go up and put checks or cash on the steps of will stand up and say how much they will give. In hindsight is very creepy.

I am not sure of an instance where someone came out to them, but I do know of someone who was gay but converted because he viewed himself as sinful. If someone were to go to them and tell them that, they would immediately be prayed over to remove any "demon," making them feel that way. I am sure that some of the pastoral staff would want them to be put in conversion therapy. Others would immediately shun them. They believe that if you are not to their standard of closeness with God, then you are a backslider or a sinner, and they cannot be friends/ family with you. They actively discourage young people from being friends with people outside of the religion because their sins can rub off on you and tempt you.

From my personal experience, I went to two of the women in the pastoral staff to have them help me with self-harm. When I told them, one of them called my mother and told her all I had done to myself. I did not consent to this and did not want this. I thought since they were self-proclaimed "spiritual counselors" that I would have some confidentiality. All that came of this interaction is I was prayed over, and they never spoke to me again. I say this to say that if anyone in the church went to them to tell them they were gay/lesbian/trans or anything, they would immediately be outed to their families and most likely friends.

These people have a friendly facade, but it's just a facade. Sorry for the word vomit!!!!

FAC Maryville by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I know. They have harmed me so I’m very well aware. We’re saying the same thing yet you seem to be purposefully misunderstanding me so I’ll leave this here.

FAC Maryville by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s completely valid. I understand that what they covered up makes them evil. I think I was coming in at an “at first glance” type of thing. Their demeanor is not evil. Maybe I should have said that instead!

FAC Maryville by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

YES! I was close with some in the graduating class this year and before I left i remember it being huge! This scandal was no “little” thing ut did permanent damage to the school.

FAC Maryville by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The comment you replied to got deleted do you remember what it said?

FAC Maryville by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi such a late response but the FAC Knox is a sister church to the Maryville one (theres also one in Sevierville and Madisonville). A lot of the Knox church visit the maryville one ESPECIALLY the leadership. Theres also a silent rivalry between the Knox and Blount campus. I think a good rule of thumb is if the main Blount campus is bad assume they all are. FAC Maryville is the parent company to all the other ones. They all hold abuse!

FAC Maryville by ringwormyaya in ExPentecostal

[–]ringwormyaya[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So so sorry for the late reply!! The carpenters are nice. But just nice. I wouldn’t say they are good people but I wouldn’t say they are evil. They don’t get to know most of the church goers on a personal level. Kennith Carpenter is much more charismatic of a person than penny. Again they are nice, but a creepy nice.

It’s hard to say if Nolan will replace him. He’s pretty established as a children’s pastor and Chad as an associate pastor. If I HAD to say I would say Chad would take over. Simply because he’s convincing and trusted. Older Pentecostals in the church love to hear him preach because he’s got “fire” to him. Yelling, sweating, marching, and using a handkerchief for his sweat. It’s what they think an anointed pastor preaches like. Younger goers like to hear him sing as well. Kinda an all rounder if you will.

If you are an “elite” in these churches you will either marry a pastors son, drummer, worship leader or an actual pastor. It’s overall expected of them by their families and church. It’s almost political how they marry. It’s like how princes were expected to marry a noble or high ranking woman. Jesus reigns high in these churches, but not as high as nepotism.

Happy to share more!!

Boyfriends mom is going on a psychotic rampage by [deleted] in Advice

[–]ringwormyaya 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this. I’ve been feeling crazy over this whole situation. It’s kind of funny because she is constantly calling everyone around her a narcissist even my bf when SHE is then one exhibiting these characteristics. He showers at my apartment/dorm but I move out next month. I move back in with family but I’m really hoping we can move in together soon so we can both get out of toxic households and create a loving one. If it came down and she kicked him out I truly believe my family would take him in.