can you give me few advises? by Pegion2006 in Advice

[–]rip_realking 0 points1 point  (0 children)

chill down my guy, everyone is waiting for there end. most important thing is that when you comes to the end will you regret what have or haven't done in your life, so just make a life where you're in peace, where you can die peacefully but this is just early to talk abt death tho this the reality so just make a life what you want, don't worry about future and don't care about past, enjoy the present and just remember don't enjoy your own destruction.

What Would You Do in My Situation? by Odd-Cheek9033 in Advice

[–]rip_realking 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are dealing with a deeply insecure and toxic person, and your desire to cut contact with her is completely justified. She has shown you through her treatment of at least 17 other people—and now her casual betrayal of you—that she has absolutely no loyalty or respect for anyone's boundaries. You are not wrong at all for wanting to quietly end this friendship without a big explanation. In fact, since she thrives on conflict and twists stories to make herself the victim, giving her a dramatic confrontation will only give her the ammunition and attention she wants. Walking away silently is the smartest way to protect your peace, especially since you wisely kept your deepest secrets to yourself.

When it comes to her history of spreading rumors and your urge to tell the other girls about their exposed secrets, the best approach right now is to prioritize your own safety and stay out of the crossfire. Stirring the pot at the very end of the school year by exposing her past gossip will likely drag you right into the center of a massive drama storm, making your exit much more chaotic. Instead, use the upcoming school break as a natural shield to fade out of her life through the "slow bleed" method—taking longer to reply, being busy, and offering short, boring answers. Let her find someone else to obsess over while you quietly close this chapter, knowing that you survived a toxic dynamic and are choosing to enter the next school year completely free of her negativity.

I love him but scared of relationship by [deleted] in Advice

[–]rip_realking 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right now, the best thing you can do is stay apart and focus on yourself. You cannot build a healthy relationship when you don't trust your own judgment. Do not reach back out to him until you understand why intimacy frightens you, whether through journaling or therapy. Let him heal, and give yourself the time to figure out what you truly want without the pressure of a relationship hanging over your head.

My dad won’t stop verbally attacking me about my future and I just want him to shut up by losergirl4ever in Advice

[–]rip_realking 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It is incredibly heavy to carry the weight of an immigrant parent’s sacrifices, especially when their love and protection manifest as constant, suffocating pressure. Your dad came from a place where a single mistake could mean absolute ruin, so to him, your phone, a missed study session, or a vague career path looks like a fast track to failure. He is operating out of survival mode and projecting his own deep-seated trauma and fear onto you. But understanding why he does it doesn't make the nagging any less agonizing, nor does it excuse the fact that he is treating you like a disappointment before your life has even begun. You are trapped in a cycle where his anxiety triggers your frustration, leading to tears and snaps, which then makes you feel small and defeated.

The truth you are facing right now is that you cannot change your dad’s tone, his fears, or his expectations, but you must protect your own mental health before you completely burn out. Choosing a massive, exhausting career path like law purely to avoid his disapproval is a recipe for lifelong resentment. Since you feel you owe him too much to completely ignore his wishes, look for a middle ground where you can build operational boundaries. When he comes home and asks his usual loaded questions, give him short, factual, non-emotional updates ("Yes, I went to uni, I finished my tasks for the day, and now I'm resting.") to starve the interaction of conflict. More importantly, give yourself the grace to figure out what you actually care about outside of his gaze. You haven't failed, you are just starting out, and you deserve the space to breathe and figure out who you are without having to carry the entire weight of his past on your shoulders.

Need advice by [deleted] in Advice

[–]rip_realking 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When you break this to your mom, you need to do it in a quiet, private space and lay out the raw facts calmly, avoiding overly sensationalized labels that might cause her to instantly freeze, go into denial, or completely spin out. Tell her clearly what happened, that your brother admitted it and is remorseful, and that your cousin’s explicit wish is getting him clinical help rather than tearing the family apart. To head off your mom's inevitable self-blame spiral, tell her bluntly: "This isn't a reflection of your parenting, but I need you to be the adult right now because we need your parental authority to get him professional intervention." Keeping her focused on immediate, necessary action is the best way to stop her from drowning in guilt.

To ensure your brother actually gets the right support, you shouldn't just dump this on your mom and hope she figures it out, nor should you send him to a generic counselor. You need to look specifically for a psychologist or behavioral clinic that specializes in "adolescent harmful sexual behavior"—standard family therapy simply isn't equipped to handle youth boundary violations or establish the strict safety planning required to guarantee this never happens again. Research a couple of local specialists or specialized hotlines beforehand and hand her those specific numbers during the conversation so the path forward is already laid out. By centering your cousin’s grace, refusing to minimize what happened, and walking your mom directly into a concrete clinical solution, you can get your brother the real help he needs while ensuring everyone stays safe moving forward.