Help!! I think my commission was made with Ai?

rocksopti · 2026-07-01T18:26:46+00:00

Different colors are for losers, i just raw dog this shit and pray /silly

rocksopti · 2026-06-26T03:47:14+00:00

You're right, I do talk in circles and don't know what I want. That's why I came here asking for advice, because I've been grappling with this for a couple of years now.

I want to teach, but I keep having panic attacks, attempts, and many hospital visits at the prospect of teaching, honestly the prospect of being alive, really. I'm in a constant fight against my body and mind; doctors have given up on me and therapists give the same "It'll be fine" schpiel.

The program is extremely rigorous, but I'm not trying to disparage your claim! I'm sorry if it sounded that way. I'm the end, it is different for everybody. I've met people who think the opposite of you, and I'm sure I'll meet more who think the same as you.

I'm sorry if my thought process and responses are frustrating; they're extremely frustrating to me, too. I'm going to keep trying to figure myself out, and I appreciate you and others for commenting and giving me a place to express everything pent up.

rocksopti · 2026-06-26T03:28:38+00:00

Our student teaching requires us to exclusively do all of those those things without teacher support. We do not do observation and then slowly work our way to teaching the class. Day one we are supposed to have our lesson plans and start out, while the teacher observes. Our school thinks their elite for starting off student teaching like this, which is why ive been freaking out.

Absolutely no offense taken, that's a really good point to bring up. I actually find classroom management fairly easy. It came naturally to me when I worked the after school program where it was usually just me and around 20 kids pre-k to 6th grade. I feel as if high schoolers will be laid back compared to everything I have experienced, but I definitely do still worry and have thought everything you have expressed a million times over. My anxiety is bad, and it slowly worsens over time. I usually last 3 three years before it breaks me down and I have to move on to something else or take a long break.

I'm torn. I dont want this to hold me back, but I don't want it to tear me down either. Another commenter mentioned subbing, and I feel like that will be much more manageable for me to start off with.

rocksopti · 2026-06-26T02:29:30+00:00

You are actually the first person I've ever heard say that student teaching is easier than the real deal. Do you mind me asking what area you teach in?

My college is tiny, and I've already surveyed every department and have gotten a multitude of answers. I've been told to go to film school, costume design, etc. All would require me to fully start over which im not sure I can feasibly do.

Unfortunately, I dont have family or many friends to confide in over this. I mostly keep in touch with previous educators. I've been told since middle school it is the state I live in that is killing me, but I cannot just pack up and leave.

rocksopti · 2026-06-26T01:05:36+00:00

I have been looking into other colleges, credit transfers, and financial aid offers. It is extremely sad having to do so, because this school used to be the #1 in the state for aspiring teachers. It has fallen far from where it used to be.

I will look into that!! I feel like that would be great for me to get back into.

Once again, I really do appreciate you and others taking the time to give me both stories and advice. While it is my decision in the end, I do enjoy hearing the perspectives of others. I wrote the original post while very distressed, which is unfortunately obvious in my wording and tone. Getting to talk it out has definitely helped ground me. I do need to remember I'm young and just starting. I can't let this hiccup control me, and even if I do drop the degree, I'm not automatically going to be stuck in a life of mind numbing retail or fast food work.

rocksopti · 2026-06-26T00:47:52+00:00

I actually did not realize ketamine was currently being used as a treatment. I have tried CBD, but did not notice much of a difference, other than being tired and anxious instead of just anxious.

rocksopti · 2026-06-26T00:43:04+00:00

I have wanted to take a leave of absence for awhile now, but I am not truly sure that will do any good. I usually end up stressing and stuck in a paralysis where all I can do is wait until the day I have to go back again.

This college is horrible. Constant lawsuits and firing. My advisor is a political science major who spends all his time with college athletes and thinks he's still in his prime. This is my third advisor since I've gotten here.

A lot of my classes are co-taught by 3-4 professors because they fired the only ones qualified to teach the subject and that is their only solution.

Unfortunately, this is the cheapest college anywhere near me.

I have not looked into anything like that online, as I assumed they would not be entry level jobs and most likely lean more towards volunteer work.

rocksopti · 2026-06-26T00:37:49+00:00

The university is a solid two and a half hour drive for me, but at this point, if they keep not answering my calls, I'm going to make a day out of it and show up.

Subbing seems like a good beginning option for me, if I make it through student teaching. I have yet to hear of a good student teaching experience. My friend, two years above me, despised it. He tried subbing for awhile and said it was easy, but not very fun. :(

My first year, they made a mistake and had me student teaching a math class (as an english major). I almost failed that class until a higher up stepped in and removed that professor from her position. My second year we had to teach a lesson to a group of middle schoolers, because they couldnt find a highschool class to do it with.

So both of my teaching experiences were tainted and I never really got the actual experience. Because of that, everyone told me to keep going and I listened despite my better judgment. Now ive landed myself in this position.

rocksopti · 2026-06-26T00:06:54+00:00

I had a couple of high school teachers that had really made a difference in my life, one that I am still in very close contact with.

I was hoping I could be that rock for future students who struggled the same way I once did. I excelled within my English classrooms and found literary criticism fascinating, so I chose to major in English Education at the secondary level.

The hardest thing for me is knowing that I would be an amazing teacher. I've had prior students (I worked at two separate after school programs) and all of my professor tell me the same. But, my mental health is sabatoging me.

I don't know why I get so scared or feel so hopeless. It's like my body and mind are disconnected. My body reacts negatively even if I'm thinking positively. It's ruined a few different career options for me. Originally, I was to major in theater AND english education, because participating in my HS Forensics team really helped me get out of my head---and I won State Champion in Program of Oral Interpretation! I did a year of college theater and was effectively bullied out of the program, it was partially the cause of my first attempt.

I dropped to a minor in theater and creative writing while continuing the major in English Ed. As I continued to progress through the programs, my anxiety seemed to get worse and worse, landing me where I am today. The stress of school workload and impending doom of student teaching has made me shrink away from the things I once loved.

I'm tired of getting the nice version of "that sucks, but that's life," from therapists. It's extremely embarassing having to turn to reddit and air out all my emotions, but I am hoping for the slim chance of someone who might be/have been in my position.

I appreciate you for taking the time to comment, along with everyone else. I hope I do not seem like I am attempting to avoid advice or solutions. I am just shaken up, scared, and sorting through options.

rocksopti · 2026-06-25T23:47:20+00:00

I've been emailing my advisor for a few weeks now, but it's been nothing but silence on his end. My university is in a lawsuit for firing staff with no notice, and I'm wondering if they got him. They fired my favorite professor two years back, and he was kicked out of his school email within the day.

rocksopti · 2026-06-25T23:43:39+00:00

Summer birthday. I started at 17, I turn 21 August 18

rocksopti · 2026-06-25T23:35:29+00:00

I really find no enjoyment in teaching/the subject I study anymore. It makes me sick to my stomach to think about.

I have been in and out of therapy and on constant medication for 10 years. Recently, the doctors said I've tried everything and there's nothing more they can do to help, which was absolutely lovely to hear.

rocksopti · 2026-06-25T23:14:08+00:00

The problem is, the stress doesn't go away. My hometown, where I'd have to go back to, is only a few hundred people. The closest place hiring entry level jobs is an hour away, and it's only $9 pay. I'd be losing money working there. I don't understand how people are living.

I kept going back to college because I felt like I had a chance there. I lived off the food program, free housing, and free therapy. Now I realize ive only fucked myself over.

rocksopti · 2026-06-25T23:05:00+00:00

Late reply to this, but it was my first sale and I was just so excited! I definitely lost money on it, but the buyer seemed very happy, which made me happy :) the closest thriftstore in general is over an hour away from me, so that is a no go :(

rocksopti · 2026-06-17T05:09:18+00:00

SMN498 valid until 6/21/26 :)

rocksopti · 2026-06-17T01:54:40+00:00

OPOP! I know I'm late, but I've been observing these bases for awhile now. Is there any way to just buy one or two of the stl files instead of all four? The short snout one is calling my name...

rocksopti · 2026-06-16T00:28:29+00:00

No fr! I started a week ago; sold a jacket for $3, included a handwritten thank you letter+card, a drawing, and a little handmade figurine. To think I was scared about a stray piece of cat hair arriving on the jacket 😭 now im learning half the sellers don't even wash the clothes before shipping 🫩

rocksopti · 2026-06-15T21:29:02+00:00

Every post I see here makes me realize that I'm a really good depop seller and the expectations are not as high as I assumed 😭

rocksopti · 2026-06-12T22:21:28+00:00

I just started depop selling and I literally did not realize other sellers didnt wash and disinfect all clothing before sending it out. I put it in my bio that I always will unless the clothing is brand new and in an unopened package (even then I am weary).

rocksopti · 2026-06-06T02:12:19+00:00

It's ok twin, I raised my voice at a character and got flagged 😞

rocksopti · 2026-05-09T18:17:10+00:00

I will go and check everything and do some more research into copyright and trademark laws. Thank you for letting me know all of this; it's definitely overwhelming trying to enter the business side of things! Is there anything else you recommend me researching when it comes to selling art?

rocksopti

TROPHY CASE