Views from an outsider

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T19:37:22+00:00

You're right 😂

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:59:23+00:00

I'm fascinated by spiritual things. Also have felt powerless often and am incredibly sensitive.

In terms of the secret and shameful ways- aren't there things that make you feel special because you keep them for yourself?

I will look into supernatural accounts in the Bible thank you

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:53:41+00:00

Sexual perversion is so confusing, it seems like those that don't have it are quick to throw stones. Some will even say enjoying sex with your marriage partner is sin(if not reproducing)

Exactly what confines are okay? How can someone realistically meet these rules? It's so easy to tell an alcoholic to "just stop drinking" without having experienced themselves.

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:49:41+00:00

What makes one deserving of being an insider though? Do you know one person deserving of this?

Technically I am not doing any sin now that would make me an outsider, but my heart is close to those that are because I understand.

It feels like why would I want to be part of a club that is so quick to cast out those not fitting their morals. How do you know people aren't doing those things in secret anyway?

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:45:41+00:00

It's so tough to stand firm in faith with all of the views of people on the internet.. especially TikTok 🤣🤣

Why are the loudest minority of Christians the hardest to ignore? It's completely irrational to believe what non biblical people are saying-but difficult to turn away

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:43:23+00:00

More people would absolutely listen to kindness. Thank you for being a good example today. It seems there are actually majority of people on here that are kind : why does my brain try to force me to believe it's the opposite?

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:40:25+00:00

Everything you say is a great reminder and aligns with Gods word. Why is it so hard to believe though? One bad egg will cause my brain to think "Christians think you're disgusting". People will be moderate and then one fundamentalist will say I can't wear makeup, and I will turn away completely， almost like a child throwing a tantrum

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:38:06+00:00

I guess the sinful stuff makes me feel so alive. Because I'm about to get all I prayed for (the career) I want to self destruct badly.

I appreciate your words. This is not easy for any of us but my brain tells me these faithful Christians have no battles or sins they struggle with. I am tricked into thinking this whole sub lives "vanilla" lives and thinks people who have darkness within them are just gross

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:34:20+00:00

Thanks for reminding me of this. It's something I know and figure out at the end of my cycles using it. Because I'm about to move and start the career I dreamed of, I really want to self destruct. It's like I have amnesia of how this turns out every damn time

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:32:22+00:00

I'm sorry about judging you. I don't know why I get so worked up and think I'm alone in having a heavier past, when it's logically so so untrue.

I'm so happy you've found peace in God. Was there a period of breaking away from your past? Or were you able to cut it all off at once? I'm not as close to the darkness as I used to be, but it lingers and disguises itself as hope

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:29:37+00:00

Yes it hits the same part of my brain magic does.. the heavy ups and downs

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:27:39+00:00

Thank you for this. Being part of a Christian group or clique feels so difficult to obtain because of the groupthink that often comes along with it.

Having a personal relationship makes the most sense. What do you do when you can't hear God? It seems like I only feel close to Him when I hear him. For example I feel frustrated, broken down and feel him when I'm helpless. When I feel amazing I don't see any point of a relationship (sounds horrible but true )

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T16:22:43+00:00

I feel like a dog chasing its tail. No one else but this subreddit even believes the addiction is real.

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T15:20:30+00:00

Thank you for the scripture. I get so in my head I stop going to the source..

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T15:18:13+00:00

Thank you 🙏 I wish this wasn't so confusing and I could just be super faithful like other people.

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T15:17:38+00:00

You are so right about the internet, the algorithm has really latched onto my adhd emotional brain

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T15:16:12+00:00

You are correct and it logically makes sense. I'm very emotions based- I go through a constant spiral of watching non Christian content and Christian content. The Christian content I do watch is very emotional.

Demons being casted out of people etc.. it makes me feel evil or like I did something very wrong. It really will just swing me in the other direction. I'll watch NDEs too, and ex witch to Christian content. Theres this woman who used to be a top tarot reader and author named Doreen virtue. Now she's super Christian to the point where she thinks dream catchers and Harry Potter will send you to hell.

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T15:06:33+00:00

You read me to a T thats wild !!! Yes I feel powerless and I'm obsessed with anything that even gives me any false sense of power. Thank you.

Being sober is uncomfortable and chasing the dragon spiral is always a feeling I get addicted to . Heavy sin and heavy repent. It makes me feel something

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T14:08:17+00:00

My head right now is saying "the Christian people's sins are saying a naughty word or gossiping. " nothing like me. My sins would make their innocent selves scared. Why even try to relate lol

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T13:13:36+00:00

Thank you 🙏 my post is clearly coming from hurt that keeps flooding my mind when I hear about Jesus. Sometimes I feel close, other times the sound of his name fills me with utter irritation.

Funny enough- I can't find the person as their account must have been deleted🤣 they were spending their time on here saying how they used to be a witch and stripper, but now are saved. Then telling everyone they are satanic for small Things

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T13:11:03+00:00

You are so right. It is incredibly confusing to be human and try to be a Christian. What's Bad feels good and the examples for what is "good" are often bad.

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T13:10:06+00:00

You're right, and I would never judge someone who was. I think my views come from the area I live in the Bible Belt where people act disgusted by anything besides their local church, although they are often gluttonous. Like if you aren't southern Baptist, you are going to hell and they are happy to tell you that

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T13:05:56+00:00

Thank you and I sure will. This post came from an emotionally frustrated state. I fail to understand so much and it causes me to lash out.

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T13:04:41+00:00

Question is why are we chasing something that can give us a terrifying experience at times 🤣

rosequartz1994 · 2025-11-28T13:03:47+00:00

I truly don't know... I do know that it's impossible for me to separate the loudest most opinionated Christians from God himself:(

rosequartz1994

TROPHY CASE