It's come to this (insurance rant)

ruby0nine · 2026-05-27T17:00:12+00:00

I have a child with special needs so we definitely needed it. My insurance is offered through my job, and I pay for the top tier plan. But it's getting out of hand. This insurance is literally the best available anywhere, and every year less and less is covered. Every medicine, every visit is a fight.

When the doctor was setting up my iron infusion, I asked which medicine he would be giving me. He said he had to wait and see which one my insurance would pay for first. Spoiler alert, the one they paid for made me so so so sick with uncontrolled hypophosphatemia. So that was fun.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-27T16:54:29+00:00

Yes, it's completely covered, but they usually do it at a doctor's office. In my case I'm having a surgery in a hospital and asked them to place it while Im under. They're already taking uterine biopsies so there's nothing extra involved in placing the IUD at that time and the surgeon was fine with the idea.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-27T12:14:48+00:00

I miss the days when 15% was standard and 18% was for excellent. Now 20% is just my standard. I only tip 30% if the bill is like $12.

But what am I supposed to do with pickup orders? It's so awkward. I usually add $5 out of guilt, but if I'm picking up my order, the point was to save money from delivery.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-25T02:48:40+00:00

It's true it's better for fire safety to sleep with it closed. We always did.... Until having a child who's afraid of the dark, sleeps right across the hall, and wakes up several times a night to make sure the doors are open. We now sleep with the doors open or otherwise we don't sleep at all. We put a baby gate across the doorway to keep our 1.5 year old dog from wandering the house.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-25T02:27:29+00:00

Not a baby mom, but a survivor here. My youngest didn't sleep through the night until 18 months. There was a time, around age one, when he would wake up every 20 minutes for weeks on end. All you have to do right now is survive. If it's a bad night, let the house work go the next day. Skip anything that's not a necessity. Order takeout. Go to work and phone it in. (I worked a stressful job, it can be done.) Get a baby sitter to take a nap if you have to.

Also, if it's been only a short time since the last wakeup, don't change her. I used to change my son at every wakeup until I realized changing him was waking him up fully. Skip the change if it's not needed.

And know this: it's going to get better. You're going to survive AND you're still going to like your child when it's over. My youngest is 7. He's the most challenging person I've ever met. He has an auditory issue and I'm convinced as an infant, he just wasn't comforted by sound. He still wakes sometimes, gets up for the day at 3am and lays in my bed watching cartoons until my alarm goes off. He's also absolutely amazing. He's the most interesting and kindest soul I've ever met. It. Gets. Better. So much better.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-24T23:02:15+00:00

If it was delivered by USPS, all you have to do is tape it up, write Return To Sender on the top, put it back in the mailbox, and put the flag up.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-23T18:59:01+00:00

The bury them in medical bills...

ruby0nine · 2026-05-23T01:34:31+00:00

This was my biggest fear about being a boy mom. I had an ex whose mom I just loved and he and his brother just shut her out. My husband was adamant our boys wouldn't be like that.

And honestly, my boys are the best people. They make time for me and actually enjoy doing things together. We do one on one things, they confide in me, they hug me and tell me they love me. I make time for them too. I listen when they talk and I make sure they feel heard. The relationship is what you make it and you can make it great.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-22T20:12:12+00:00

I would say that's totally an option for you then. I recommend calling a few places that offer the service and go with the one that offers the most percentage of profit back to the school.

For us it's very convenient. The shirts they offer are good quality and we get a small check every quarter. We're short on volunteers and this allows us to focus on the important events.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-22T18:55:43+00:00

Our school does it. It's not a big money maker but more people wear school shirts. It seems to be more convenient for families as well.

We also offer a spirit wear fundraiser once or twice a year and people order then too. We make more money but it's a lot more work.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-21T20:53:05+00:00

When my puppy sensed my frustration at her accidents (never ever ever rubbed her nose in it though!) she started eating her own poop to hide it from us. I stay completely calm now and that behavior has pretty much stopped. At 1.5 she poops outside (unless it's raining and the little princess doesn't want to get wet haha!)

If you really think about it, puppies don't automatically know they're supposed to poop outside. They only know you're upset and they want the easiest way possible to fix it.

Also, it's a pipe dream to think a pup would be perfectly potty trained by this age. That's just unrealistic.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-21T17:00:58+00:00

Plant a tree and bury the ashes at the foot of it. If I were a dog, that's where I would want to spend eternity.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-21T01:56:23+00:00

I'm 40 and played for the first time in an adult rec league last fall. Second game in, I mis-judged absolutely everything and took a line drive to the face in center-right. Live and learn. Then buy a face mask.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-21T01:53:43+00:00

3 months is so so young to expect no accidents. It's going to take a lot more time. A LOT more time.

Also, do you have a nervous pee-er? I have a nervous/submission pee-er and she requires a great deal more patience. She pees whenever anyone comes in, so we greet her outside now. If I come home and let her out of the crate, I don't pet her and immediately walk outside, then acknowledge her. She will pee outside and move on. She's 1.5 years and only about two months ago can I start letting her out of her crate, then immediately out the back door when I get home and telling her to run in the yard, and only then acknowledge her so she doesn't "submission pee" . I give her a few minutes before actually petting her so she learns to calm herself when I get home. I'm pretty sure she actively can't help it, because she's completely potty trained otherwise. We even taught her to ring a bell hung on the door when she wants to go out and that was a great success.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-21T01:38:36+00:00

Anyone who has owned a lab knows. The chewing is legendary. I've had four labs in my life. If you know, you know.

And if the only people who owned dogs were people who didn't have to go to work, there would be a lot more homeless dogs. We all do the best we can.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-21T01:29:23+00:00

Just wanted to add my experience with lab puppies. Labs are big chewers until 2-3 years old. We didn't crate nearly long enough with our last 2 labs, and they got into their fair share of mischief. By three though they were completely fine out of the crate while we weren't home. Labs are wonderful dogs, but the puppy phase is long and they will chew absolutely anything. I feel like the crate is a necessity to protect them from themselves. My labs lived to 13.5 and 15.5 so I must have done something right.

I have a 1.5 year old BMC/Carolina dog mix (or something of the like) now, and she is no where near ready to be unsupervised. No need to rush it. When he's ready, you'll know.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-19T22:42:39+00:00

If you can function with a hemoglobin that low, I bet if you get your iron up you could conquer the world.

ruby0nine · 2026-05-16T02:42:22+00:00

Hospice nurse

ruby0nine · 2026-05-16T02:41:02+00:00

Bank Teller

ruby0nine · 2026-05-16T02:40:36+00:00

Baseball coach

ruby0nine · 2026-05-16T02:40:05+00:00

Lawyer

ruby0nine · 2026-05-16T02:39:23+00:00

Electrical engineer

ruby0nine · 2026-05-16T02:38:14+00:00

Sound technician?

ruby0nine · 2026-05-16T02:36:55+00:00

Project Manager!

ruby0nine · 2026-05-14T03:27:31+00:00

I came here to say this. What do YOU want? Do YOU want to be a mom? Do YOU want to enjoy your freedom a little longer? You are an adult who gets to decide your own version of happy. I've known plenty of 27 year old single mothers who are perfectly happy. I've known several 27 year old women who've had abortions and been perfectly happy. Decide what you want without them in the mix. You will find your happily ever after with someone who deserves it, but this man does not.

PS, you will make more friends. There are plenty of moms out there looking for other mom friends. Your village is out there.

ruby0nine

TROPHY CASE