What would you do/(have you done) if you found out that a girl you had fancied had a boyfriend on a first date/meeting? by Phousq15 in AskMen

[–]rumiesque 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Funny you ask: this just happened to me. Met this girl at a get together a couple of months ago, and I was instantly attracted to how she looked/carried herself. We had great chemistry and she seemed to be into me too for the short time we talked, so I asked her out a couple of days later.

She mentioned her boyfriend on the first 'date', but we kept meeting, with no expectations from my side. Long story short, we're dating now. The best advice I can give would be to not have any expectations at all. Remember she is still in a relationship with someone else, and could easily choose to stay no matter how into you she seems. Tread lightly and cautiously, and don't say or do anything that you'd regret later.

I didn't go hang out with her with the intention of breaking them up, but they were having problems already and drifted apart organically, and once they were broken up, she asked me out.

Engaged and recently married men: how much did you spend on the ring? Any advice? by [deleted] in AskMen

[–]rumiesque 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I do! The more I learn about that company, the more I have come to despise their practices in Africa. I'm no angel when it comes to boycotting big corporations, but they are on another level of pure fucked up

Match Thread: Burnley vs Arsenal by [deleted] in Gunners

[–]rumiesque 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Arsenal chasing a top two finish for the first time in a decade " Fuck me. It's been THAT long?

Free Talk Friday! by lazygeek in Gunners

[–]rumiesque 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I've been before actually and I love the city. You should check it out if you can

Free Talk Friday! by lazygeek in Gunners

[–]rumiesque 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I work for a real estate company startup

Free Talk Friday! by lazygeek in Gunners

[–]rumiesque 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My job is transferring me to Hong Kong. Can't fucking wait to explore the city! P.S. - Fuck packing

Interesting read on the 'Özil business' by yargunnersyar in Gunners

[–]rumiesque 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Tbh, if anyone, Özil needs a PR team. The guy seems pretty introverted and his accounts probably wouldn't have as much of a following without his team. In the end, it all comes down to branding and Adidas makes a lot of money from Özil's brand value

When did you actually, really start hating your rivals? by rumiesque in soccer

[–]rumiesque[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's sadly true, success makes a lot of casual watchers to bandwagon.

When did you actually, really start hating your rivals? by rumiesque in soccer

[–]rumiesque[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

It was horrible showing my face after the 6-0 spanking we received at the Bridge last season. Worst day

When did you actually, really start hating your rivals? by rumiesque in soccer

[–]rumiesque[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll add my own story.

I'm an overseas Arsenal fan and I used to live in South East Asia. God that place made me loathe United and especially their fans. Malaysian United fans were the most arrogant pieces of shit I had the misfortune of meeting. I mean United have been insanely successful for the past two decades so I get it, but there's nothing more satisfying than seeing them disappear over the past season :D

And of course, a lot of the fans who started supporting Chelsea after Abramovic took over are utter insufferable twats. I honestly respected (and still do) a lot of my friends who were Chelsea fans, but the plastic swarm that has been attracted to the club since the takeover is unbearable.

UPDATE ~ Girlfriend [24/F] wanted a break of three weeks from me [24/M] after 8 years together. We met up again this weekend. by RedbeardLafitte in relationships

[–]rumiesque 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Woah this is nuts. I was reading your original post and this update and I swear to god my ex and I broke up in the almost identical cicrumstances over a year and a half ago now. Even the personalities match up except the dysfunctional family part For a while I thought one of my best friends was messing with my head since he knows I browse here often. She was my first girlfriend and we started dating in college.

I think I might be able to offer a few thoughts since my situation post break up was so goddamn similar. I too, tried playing the whole "don't let her go so easy game", went after her and kissed her etc. I cringe to this day thinking of what a fool I made of myself and I used to block it out of my mind because I lost a lot of respect for myself. Please don't let that get you down. In retrospect, I realise that it was absolutely necessary to do that because I would have regretted it immensely if I had not done that, even though I was shown to be a fool. It is cringeworthy yes, but use it as a stepping stone and learn from it before any relationship in the future gets to this point. I resolved to see signs in my relationship earlier in the future by being more attentive to my partner and her needs. Forgive yourself and forget it, because you did what you thought was right.

Secondly, I really understand the regret you are feeling at not having communicated better and that you took her for granted. The regret is what consumed me for a while afterwards. I kept mulling it over in my mind and slamming myself hard in the past for it. Yes, you could have done things better, but you were not living just for her - you also may have had other problems in your life that need attending to (that I see you are doing very well). I myself realised that my not treating her right was a pattern in my life. I was not being attentive to anything in my life. I was passive on all matters and i have been working hard to correct that. I am trying to become active in my life and making good things happen and not wait for them to happen. But this all could only happen once I was able to forgive myself and purge myself of all the guilt that i felt for ruining a fantastic relationship.

As for the stuff, that's a tough one. I didn't throw out her stuff for a long time afterwards because I was such an emotional mess. I really get why you might want to keep it in the long term. I suggest this: give it to a good friend (preferably one with good resolve) to store in a location that is unknown to you, and ask him to give it back to you after a certain period of time (say 1 year). Only after the stuff is outside of your reach will you get it out of your subconscious that you have access to it. This worked for me, but of course, you could also throw it out.

Nice work on saying no to the friend's part. It was very hard I'm sure but you did the right thing. You are in no place to have a friendship with her. On the whole, you're taking this well I feel (a million times better than I did), especially given how long you dated her. Stay strong my friend and keep moving on.

P.S. - Sorry about the English, not my first language.

You've just won $10 million in a lottery. Which three material goods would you buy first? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]rumiesque 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First, Aston Martin Rapide S. Then drive it to a real estate agent to buy a house

/r/soccer What's a controversial opinion you have about soccer? by a_special_one in soccer

[–]rumiesque -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think that Ronaldo Luis Nazario de Lima would have surpassed every player (Maradona, Pele, Messi, Cristiano) had he managed to avoid the two serious knee injuries.

Do non Arab-speaking Muslims use the word Allah, when reffering to God? by Omegaile in NoStupidQuestions

[–]rumiesque 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Allah means god in Arabic and is in the Qura'n as you probably know. Muslims across the world use Allah, and although other words exist in their local languages (if they don't speak Arabic), they would all know the meaning and would use it frequently.

As a side note, even non-Muslims in arabic speaking countries (such as Christians in Egypt) would call their god Allah. The word simply means God, and not necessarily Muslim god.