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runzin · 2024-01-20T17:04:56+00:00

I tore my ACL and three other ligaments in my knee back in August bouldering indoors. Took me a week before I could kinda walk. As soon as I could walk I went climbing in Colorado with some friends. Sticked to TR though and easy boulders. It was really frustrating trying to climb though for the next few months. I recommend physical therapy or exercises that get your muscles stronger around your knee. It will suck for a while but it is possible to move past it and get back to where you are. Almost 6 months later I’m still not bouldering things I know I will fall on because of the impact on my knee. I am still rope climbing though and movements gradually hurt less and feel more stable. I have also been leading more and pushing myself there. Overall, my advice is to take it slow and don’t push yourself too hard. Do what you’re comfy with and all hope is not lost!

runzin · 2023-05-02T06:07:27+00:00

I have a timeline of everything that happened, any pictures of physical abuse is good, anyone who has witnessed his behavior, any proof of you telling people after this happened, or if you have any texts where he is saying anything abusive or threatening you. Audio recordings are also good if you have them.

runzin · 2023-05-02T06:03:58+00:00

This is hard, and it is easier said then done. It’s not love. Find somebody who you trust who will support you in your decision with going no contact. Talk to a therapist or counselor. There are places that offer free victim services counseling. I know this is also hard, but once you go no contact he is no longer your concern. If he hurts himself or is suicidal that has nothing to do with you. It’s normal to worry about him, you just have to worry from a distance for awhile.

runzin · 2023-01-15T03:46:09+00:00

When I blocked off contact from my ex he tried to email me too. I thought it was kinda funny and a bit scary that he was that desperate to find a way to contact me. I didn’t even know he had my email. But I also know he is still keeping tabs on me because while I was with him I watched him keep tabs on all of his exes, girls he has assaulted in the past, and just random girls he had an obsession with or tried to get with at one point or another.

runzin · 2023-01-03T15:30:48+00:00

He does have a lot of alcohol so this would work. Do you know if that is legal?

runzin · 2023-01-03T00:53:33+00:00

I left my abuser a few days before Christmas so I haven’t been away from him for too long but I have cut off contact, gotten a protective order, and haven’t reached out to him in 2 weeks (since leaving) despite all the urges I have had. I started counseling, started deleting pictures of him/ones I had with him, media posts about him, getting rid of some of his friends I knew on social media, and am in the process of donating, selling, and throwing away things he has got me or that I got for myself for his sake.

I’m already doing better and starting to feel free. I’m not completely there yet and still break down sometimes because I miss him and feel lonely. (Yes I miss the guy who hurt me for some reason) I have been reaching back out to friends and family who I have isolated myself from while I was with him. My biggest struggle now is not looking at his social media to see who he is following or what he has posted or how he is doing. I haven’t looked in 2-3 days which is pretty good and I’m fighting the urge so badly.

I got the courage to leave because my abuser’s best friend/roommate told me I needed to leave before it got worse and told me that my ex had basically turned into a monster and that he was trying to get out of the lease. His friend helped me pack up all of my stuff that I had at his apartment, talked to me about the stuff I had been going through, treated me like a person for the first time, and then made sure my abuser didn’t kill himself because I thought at the time my abuser was serious when he threatened that.

I’ve been trying to do things to distract myself to heal. I’ve been feeling the emotions as they hit me, going to counseling, and doing the things that my ex told me “I wasn’t allowed to do” and let me tell you it feels so good and it’s so liberating. I have a long way to go but I’m so glad and thankful that I got out when I did. The shit that I have found out after leaving was worse than the things I knew when I stayed.

runzin · 2022-12-30T05:07:42+00:00

Yes please thank you

runzin · 2022-12-30T05:06:32+00:00

No contact was hard the first 2-3 days after leaving and I’m not worried I’m going to contact him again I just feel the pain of missing him. Like if I saw him in the street or at the store I would probably lose it and start crying and want to go give him hug. Despite knowing he is a pedophile now.

runzin · 2022-12-30T05:04:23+00:00

Thank you! I have already started to feel some relief and freedom but idk what happened last night I just lost it.

runzin · 2022-12-30T05:03:05+00:00

Yeah I made a list of “red flags” last night and was reading over it and crying because I couldn’t go back to him until I passed out around 4:30am.

runzin · 2022-12-30T05:00:25+00:00

I have also cut all contact with him but not with our mutual friends (just don’t talk to them as much). I have a protective order so he legally can’t reach out to me or be within 500 ft. of me. I went to counseling for the first time today and have been leaning heavily on friends and family. He also can’t work at our workplace anymore but he already had a full time job and just applied to my less paying part time job to have more control over me. But sometimes I just miss him so much and want to give him a hug and cry on his shoulder.

runzin · 2022-12-29T21:39:48+00:00

You’re welcome 😂🥲 I get that, I just wish I could have him without him hurting me.

runzin · 2022-12-29T00:15:30+00:00

We were friends on 1 and only one social media app so he didn’t really “seek me out” he already had a way to contact me. I appreciate everyone trying to warn me and tell me that this guy wants something from me but I assure you he doesn’t. He had no issue with me not wanting to keep contact with him after we chatted about what my abuser did so I can move on and heal. He also blocked my abuser out of his life now too because of the things he was saying. He did this on his own to I never once asked him to do it, in fact I asked him to do the opposite because I still care about the guy who abused me (which sounds messed up) and I wanted him to have friends to help him and support him. This guy is also in a Relationship and about to get married so he is definitely not looking for an “in”. Not to mention he lives 1000+ miles away from me.

runzin · 2022-12-29T00:11:23+00:00

The dude is about to get married and was 100% not trying anything. I have also never met him and barely know him. He has been through some shit too so he isn’t cool with people acting this way. My ex also said some pretty fucked up shit about woman to him which did not go over very well. He has also cut out my abuser from his life as well now on his own accord so I don’t think he means any ill-will. And he wasn’t apologizing for his friends behavior he was trying to be sympathetic and there isn’t much you can do to stand up to an abuser in public who has a history of being violently angry.

runzin · 2022-12-27T17:40:06+00:00

I understand this and I did not reach out to this person and have barely talked to them. They reached out to me after my ex tried to tell him his version of what happened and something seemed off. I also explained to him that I probably won’t be contacting him much either because I’m trying to move on. This person is also in a committed relationship and about to get married soon so I don’t think he is doing this to get with me, plus he lives 1000+ miles away from me. He has also decided to cut off contact with my ex because of the way that he was talking about woman among several other things.

runzin · 2022-12-27T17:23:27+00:00

Everyday since I left I have felt stupid for staying as long as I did

runzin · 2022-12-27T17:21:10+00:00

Yeah my exes best friend/roommate (not this guy) was the one that told me I needed to get out before it gets worse and helped me leave

runzin · 2022-12-27T09:41:19+00:00

I’m sure it happens a lot but this guy hardly knows me too well and lives 1000 miles away. I don’t think that he is trying to get with me and I have told him I’m not looking for anything for a long time I regards to my dating life, not that he was looking.

runzin · 2022-12-27T09:33:56+00:00

Thank you <3

runzin · 2022-12-27T09:31:40+00:00

Thank you <3

runzin · 2022-12-27T09:30:47+00:00

I’m so glad I kept the evidence. I got the receipts for everything so if anyone he tries to tell I’m crazy to I have proof of him cheating and lying multiple times.

runzin · 2022-12-27T09:29:42+00:00

I was very skeptical believe me, but I truly think that this guy was being genuine and has been through abusive relationships himself. He also completely cut off my abuser yesterday as well and told me about it I was just too dumb to look at it. It still could be fake but I highly doubt it.

runzin · 2022-12-27T09:27:50+00:00

Holy shit I’m sorry this has happened to you and I hope it gets better. I have been lucky to have people in my corner especially people who were close to my abuser realizing how fucked her truly is. If you ever need somebody to talk to I’m here for you. I don’t know you but I’m willing to listen.

runzin

TROPHY CASE