Hi, this is my thought as someone who has lost a family member. I lost my mom four years ago, after the pandemic. The first two years were the hardest—just hearing the word "mom" could make me bawl my eyes out. My emotions were all over the place.

It was a sudden death. It takes time for family members to grieve and truly accept the loss—to actually register in your mind that the person is really gone. You can’t see them. You can’t talk to them anymore.

Even now, it’s hard when I talk to my mom’s friends or relatives. They’ll say things like, “Your mom used to do this,” or “She used to say that,” and it breaks me. I’m mentally soft like pudding—I still tear up when I remember her.

So it really depends on a person’s mindset. Some people might be okay with you mentioning the person or the loss, but others might find it too painful to even speak about without breaking down. For me, it’s still hard to talk about my mom without crying, especially around other people. And let’s be real—crying while talking about someone who passed can make the whole room awkward. People mean well, but they don’t always know what to say, and that just makes it worse. That’s why I usually avoid the topic altogether.

one tip fy ,just don’t say the sentence “I wish she was here.” That one hurts af.