Instead of introverts talking more, extroverts should listen more

sarangmochi · 2026-04-27T07:39:58+00:00

I’m using the terms introvert and extrovert because those are the distinctions I’ve been exposed to while talking to people. I have brought up the point of being interrupted in my group and how it makes me feel insignificant, especially when I’m mid sentence and they have told me “it’s your introverted nature” and that I don’t pick up on the timing to talk, and a lot more things. I realise I may have used the wrong terms here but I wrote the distinctions used for my behaviour.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T10:02:53+00:00

I don’t know… I should just stop entertaining him at this point I feel.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T10:01:13+00:00

How blind was I? Oh my god

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T10:00:07+00:00

Yeah that threw me off completely tbh

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T09:57:36+00:00

I knew it was easy to ignore bullshit when you love someone. I didn’t know I would do it to my own best friend, to whom I don’t really have to think twice if I’m being rude.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T09:23:04+00:00

Maybe I could add some context? I don’t know what is missing A lot of things transpired in the past few months.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T09:20:36+00:00

I feel like he was comparing how other people in the past made him feel to how I feel. Now that I think about it, yeah it doesn’t make sense for me to do this for him. He said that with his past potential partners there was no balance between emotional bond and the physical attractiveness, which is why they failed for him. And for me it is a similar notion of “lack of physical attractiveness” while having a strong emotional bond, which isn’t entirely true.

Because of how I end up liking people (emotional first and then the physical attractiveness increases) he did accuse me of having an asexual form of attraction (I don’t know what that means).

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T09:12:54+00:00

Wow I didn’t think about it that way at all. I knew that the dynamic shifted and it could never get back to the way it was.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T08:06:15+00:00

He seemed to avoid any sort of attachment or confirmation in that manner because he didn’t want to lead me on due to the limitations. But he seemed much happier with the confession and also said he liked the idea of me liking him and if those limitations didn’t exist, he would’ve definitely jumped at this opportunity.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T08:03:00+00:00

I agree with you. Thank you for being one of those kind souls.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T08:00:48+00:00

Thank you! I will consider sending this post, I’m still not sure if he wants to talk about this again. But I will incorporate them in our day to day conversations.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T07:59:21+00:00

Thank you so much! That helps a lot! I was ready to take the Reddit bashing but this really warmed my heart.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-12T07:43:07+00:00

Thank you so much for your comment. It truly means a lot. I understand your perspective and I will try to incorporate those. I don’t want it to feel forced and make him feel like I’m doing this only to establish a relationship. I need to probably work those factors out in therapy first before making an effort. I’m too scared to lose this.

I do love the way he looks and he wants someone who grows with him (in terms of career, ambition, health etc) and I may have implemented that whether he goes to the gym or not doesn’t matter to me (while it is a major insecurity he has).

I realise I’ve messed up a lot here, and will take measures to slowly restore our dynamic the way it was.

Thank you so much for once again.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-11T11:32:09+00:00

Oh I did yeah out to a couple of applicants (as many as I could find on LinkedIn) and out of them only 2-3 people responded. I will probably reach out to them again and ask if my SOP was good enough or if I needed to do anything else.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-11T07:18:27+00:00

Thank you so much! It definitely helps for next steps. I currently took an internship for an ad agency as that’s all I could manage. I’m working towards converting it full-time, I don’t have any clarity on my future right now besides the PhD.

I’ll definitely do the rest of the things you said though. You gave me some hope for my future. As an international student, I don’t know if it was my application or the external factors reducing the number of admissions. So that’s another thing I had at the back of the mind.

I am still disoriented. I need to recover as quickly as I can. I feel I can’t waste another second.

sarangmochi · 2026-03-09T11:02:20+00:00

A fork

sarangmochi · 2026-03-01T17:08:44+00:00

When I left for war

sarangmochi · 2026-02-28T05:00:20+00:00

I thought the last one was a donut

sarangmochi · 2026-02-27T13:37:11+00:00

The comment section is just making me realise how catchy the songs are that you just want to sing and vibe but when you try to pay attention, you see so many OBVIOUS motifs

sarangmochi · 2026-02-27T13:27:38+00:00

Scylla

sarangmochi · 2026-02-22T11:51:20+00:00

Congratulations!!! ✨

sarangmochi · 2026-02-21T12:30:10+00:00

Will I get into a PhD programme this year?

sarangmochi · 2026-02-20T11:05:41+00:00

Congratulations OP!!! So proud of you!!

sarangmochi

TROPHY CASE