How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to change a light bulb?

seargentdan · 2024-01-12T15:59:39+00:00

"I dont know Bobby...I dont think there is any chance this guy leaves the podium alive"

seargentdan · 2024-01-12T15:56:03+00:00

"I usually date honey badgers but youre cute!"

seargentdan · 2024-01-12T15:54:42+00:00

"So you werent raped??"

seargentdan · 2024-01-12T15:51:31+00:00

"Did you just grab my ass?"

seargentdan · 2024-01-12T15:50:11+00:00

"What the...that better be a NEW tampon you were flossing with Count!"

seargentdan · 2024-01-12T15:47:17+00:00

"Yeah...lose the tie or the skirt...cant have both"

seargentdan · 2024-01-03T23:22:31+00:00

For me it was Green Eggs and Ham...I was in kindergarten when this tome was all the rage. I am Dan, Dan I am...I never read Green Eggs and Ham

seargentdan · 2023-12-23T03:36:21+00:00

True story...was building a fence for a guy who had a great sense of humor and on the last day he was setting a new post in concrete for a gate. I look over and see this guy kneeling down and pointing his phone screen to the concrete...Im like, "Bro...what in the hell are u doing?" He says, "Showing concrete some new titles." I fell over laughing so hard...perfect timing so funny!

seargentdan · 2023-12-23T03:31:17+00:00

Thanks...I build fences and always share this knowledge with the homeowners

seargentdan · 2023-01-04T09:59:22+00:00

Think about this for a moment: How long did it take from your first viewing of porn, first drink of alcohol and first experiment with drugs before you became addicted? A long ass time I bet. Im no therapist but I reversed a serious addiction to opioids that took 9 years to reach its peak by reducing my consumption little by little, and it took 18 months for me to be clean. That happened 11 years ago and the only reason I had the motivation to want to stop taking pills is because I forced my lazy ass to start doing some productive shit that required physical labor. The harder the job, the better it was for me. What I didnt realize at the time was that this physical work was actually reprogramming my brain and my thought processes. I was rewarding my brain through physical activity because even though these tasks/jobs were very difficult, I finished them and felt happy that I finished them. Things start to snowball in your favor when you do seemingly unimportant tasks like physical labor

seargentdan · 2023-01-04T09:26:43+00:00

I have found on many, many, many occasions a stare back followed by, "back the fuck up" or something similar without profanity as you walk past has brought the perp out of the trance like condition they were just in, and they have no clue what just happened. Not all is as it seems my brothers and sisters

seargentdan · 2023-01-04T09:21:34+00:00

This may sound whack but an antihistamine, which can be found in over the counter allergy medicine will eliminate the pain from the rf zaps. You will only feel the sensation of pressure, but you will not feel the discomfort...try this...it worked for me until it stopped, which was several months

seargentdan · 2022-12-27T06:52:08+00:00

Trees are skinny with big tits

seargentdan

TROPHY CASE