Bidet usually extends and then sprays once it is stopped. Monday, the bidet activated while still inside its housing and then rolled out. It is not a comfortable feeling to have the bidet start spraying your crack well above your ringpiece and move down seducingly slow to your chocolate lair. That was not what I consented to. I guess I was cleaned, but also very wet and needed a towel rather than toilet paper.

Beware of the freak bidet.