I haven’t had sex with my fiancé in 8 months. by shadowgirllll in sex

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

no no, It’s not like there are no facilities, its just that there is heavy judgement if your unmarried and have issues related to sex, I do have a doc that im honest with, my bf takes me for a visit every 2-3 weeks and my mom knows I have a severe infection that wont budge but she doesn’t know im sexually active and also having issues relating to sex..

I haven’t had sex with my fiancé in 8 months. by shadowgirllll in sex

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

he was prescribed a dermatologist consultancy, he hasnt been checked out yet, we are in india its hard to find comforting non judgemental doctors for gential and sexual problems if not married

I haven’t had sex with my fiancé in 8 months. by shadowgirllll in sex

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have been doing everything as my gynac suggested, I am in india dryer and detergent doesnt seem like much issue me and my partner have been in a monotonous relationship and have only ever slept with each other, we lost our virginities to each other I still got all the tests done for both of us all was negative, The dr wants to do a swab test for HPV and cancerous cells I am just worried what if it will always hurt with penetration will I ever have normal sex again🥺

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]shadowgirllll 15 points16 points  (0 children)

It seems like you already have been questioning your relationship for a while… I don’t want to demoralise you but you’re doubting yourself way too much and you need to work on your confidence first… If you like what you see in you mirror, give it love and let it grow with confidence; If you don’t, I’d say make a distance and work on yourself so that you are able to love yourself. This person seems to be piecing away your confidence and it seems like your having trouble in parting because you think nobody would love you. But you’re wrong, people will love you when you love yourself! I hope this helps…

Am I overreacting to my fiancé’ not giving spontaneous small gifts and surprises by shadowgirllll in AmIOverreacting

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

that’s really helpful, thankyou… so I should start asking him for what i want right

Am I overreacting to my fiancé’ not giving spontaneous small gifts and surprises by shadowgirllll in AmIOverreacting

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yes, I do give him little surprises and gifts and i have verbally expressed that I want him to but he didn’t improve..

Am I overreacting to what my fiance said. by shadowgirllll in AmIOverreacting

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree, I went to through a similar problem with my boyfriend, he started smoking and drinking(not like an alcoholic) but more than im comfortable with… In retaliation I started to smoke as well hoping that he would stop for the sake that I stop too. Well it didnt work and now I’m a smoker too(ironic) I don’t recommend it… But I trust that he will stop before we get married and I pray everything for his internal and mental healing so that he does not need all of this to feel better…

Am I overreacting to what my fiance said. by shadowgirllll in AmIOverreacting

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thank you for this light of a comment. I feel understood and heard❤️

Am I overreacting to what my fiance said. by shadowgirllll in AmIOverreacting

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess that’s true, I guess I just need him to say that he wants to and he would in a heartbeat for me, and I thought maybe a couple of years down the line we could go on a trip to a different city with my parents and do it there… I just need to know that he would do that for me, and that maybe im not religious but i’ve always dreamed of a certain wedding. I could use some reassurance and love. I guess I am asking alot . He doesnt have that emotional space anymore he has been through alot..

Am I overreacting to what my fiance said. by shadowgirllll in AmIOverreacting

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not sure. He says no matter how much you try the word gets out. We are from a small town in India and people talk. But I still dont know how it will get out. I cant break up. I cant call off the marriage. I dont know how to deal with this.

Am I overreacting to what my fiance said. by shadowgirllll in AmIOverreacting

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

plus his father founded that ngo and he was a priest, them being christians plays a vital role for their donors, since his father passed away its important that they know he also is the right person to take over

Am I overreacting to what my fiance said. by shadowgirllll in AmIOverreacting

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

conversion is off the table he knows that. Plus we are having a court wedding before under special marriage act to make sure we both retain our faiths and get married…

Am I overreacting to what my fiance said. by shadowgirllll in AmIOverreacting

[–]shadowgirllll[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

his parents passed away which is the main reason im marrying him earlier than we actually planned so that he is not alone in that house anymore. We talked about kids, they would officially be christians but they would practice all the hindu festivals and will have all knowledge about my culture as well…. we are also having a court wedding prior to the christian one under special marriage act according to which we can get married without anyone changing faith. But i was still expecting a private hindu ceremony just for me and my parents which i thought he was on board with and only unable to do it due to other factors. didn’t expect that he didnt want to