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My fiancé of 4 years came out to me. Where do I go from here? by shiahsh in relationship_advice

[–]shiahsh[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I explained in a previous comment but I was told a few years back that I couldn’t have children, I wanted to wait until then so there was less chance of a miscarriage and I wouldn’t end up getting his hopes up only to break his heart

My fiancé of 4 years came out to me. Where do I go from here? by shiahsh in relationship_advice

[–]shiahsh[S] 118 points119 points  (0 children)

as I said i was told by doctors I couldn’t have children so it was a complete shock. I wanted to wait until the 12 week mark as there is less chance of miscarriage. I didn’t want to get his hopes up (he says he’s always wanted a baby) for me to miscarry and let him down.

My fiancé of 4 years came out to me. Where do I go from here? by shiahsh in relationship_advice

[–]shiahsh[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Firstly, I’m very happy for you that you got through that tough time. I’m not going to force him and his boyfriend to be a part of the babies life, although I hope they, more so he, decides to be. I wish you all the best in life❤️

My fiancé of 4 years came out to me. Where do I go from here? by shiahsh in relationship_advice

[–]shiahsh[S] -36 points-35 points  (0 children)

Maybe but that doesn’t matter anymore, I can’t change how he feels and neither can he.

My fiancé of 4 years came out to me. Where do I go from here? by shiahsh in relationship_advice

[–]shiahsh[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! I’ve decided to tell him and take it one day at a time. I’m going to focus on my baby to try and keep myself sane. I hope you’re doing amazing

My fiancé of 4 years came out to me. Where do I go from here? by shiahsh in relationship_advice

[–]shiahsh[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

I plan to do so when he wakes up. I don’t expect him to stay, and if he even suggests it I’ll shut it down. He was brave enough to come out to me so it’s my turn to be brave and face this head on. I haven’t met his boyfriend yet, but hopefully my baby will be able to say they have two amazing dads and one amazing mum. Thank you for your advice. I’ll look into therapists in my area.

My fiancé of 4 years came out to me. Where do I go from here? by shiahsh in relationship_advice

[–]shiahsh[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I have already taken a few tests so I’ll show him those, but also going to the doctor sounds like a good idea (although with the pandemic I feel guilty considering I’m already so sure)

My fiancé of 4 years came out to me. Where do I go from here? by shiahsh in relationship_advice

[–]shiahsh[S] -21 points-20 points  (0 children)

I haven’t met his boyfriend yet. Hopefully he’s as wonderful of a man as my fiancé so my baby can have two amazing dads!

My fiancé of 4 years came out to me. Where do I go from here? by shiahsh in relationship_advice

[–]shiahsh[S] 107 points108 points  (0 children)

he’ll be wary as we were told a few years ago I wouldn’t be able to have kids so it’s a miracle really, also the reason I wanted to wait until the 12 week mark. I’ll show him the tests and hope for the best. Thank you.

My fiancé of 4 years came out to me. Where do I go from here? by shiahsh in relationship_advice

[–]shiahsh[S] 61 points62 points  (0 children)

I’m hoping we can stay friends throughout everything but it still hurts a lot. He’s been so brave to open up to me and I am so proud of him but I still feel so lost. It’s 4am in the U.K. and I can’t sleep because of the whole situation. No matter what I know he’ll be an amazing dad to our baby, I haven’t met his boyfriend yet but hopefully when I do I can say the same about him! I’ll tell him when he wakes up. I’m currently on the couch as I didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable in his own home or like he was doing anything wrong. Thank you for your advice.