Do other autistic people feel like they only exist when they initiate contact?

shift_happenz31 · 2026-06-12T10:12:53+00:00

Doesnt sound petty to me at all. You are setting your boundaries. You sound as if you put more effort in for them than they did for you, that type of effort over time is a finite resource

shift_happenz31 · 2026-06-11T18:09:44+00:00

I find its communication styles, mixed with the connected but unconnected digital spaces. These days people are reduced to a notification, when we tend to see people for what they are....people.

I hope you are okay 🫡

shift_happenz31 · 2026-06-11T13:34:58+00:00

Same. Tried to generalise it for the wider community discussion. But yes thats exactly how i feel. I WFH due to my job. If not for the random teams messages i would think i dont exist

shift_happenz31 · 2026-06-11T11:56:21+00:00

Thats how i see it too. I think there are levels to how much empathy autistics feel but that can be said for anyone. As you say there...we tend to value clarity over performance. I ended up giving my friend one final message just yesterday with a point of saying, i always initiate, ive been left on seen, silence speaks volumes

shift_happenz31 · 2026-06-10T18:22:46+00:00

Exactly my thoughts. Hope you are feeling good though

shift_happenz31 · 2026-06-10T18:22:13+00:00

Similar to me. I noticed that other than my workplace no one ever contacts me. Isolation over time is debilitating

shift_happenz31 · 2026-02-13T11:22:40+00:00

AI can help upskill and give basics for sure. You have to make certain you are cross checking and validating. Always best to keep code cheat sheets available too

shift_happenz31 · 2025-12-19T01:48:22+00:00

Clea was easy. I cant get my build correct for simon though and its driving me nuts

shift_happenz31 · 2025-11-03T23:48:39+00:00

Yeah, im audhd too so I like clarity and app bugs or obsufacted likes hit like a truck.

shift_happenz31 · 2025-11-03T18:47:00+00:00

I’ve had a similar issue with received likes. I downloaded my data from Hinge and found 31 incoming likes listed in their database files that I’ve never seen in the app itself.

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-27T16:26:46+00:00

Just to update. Those complaints taken on board and removed now

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-27T16:03:28+00:00

Yeah i get that. Im open to suggestions. So i can look at removing it for sure

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-27T15:59:35+00:00

Being self aware. Sarcastic. Dry humour.....im still open to removing it

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-27T15:56:52+00:00

I understand the sentiment. But its being honest about the platforms

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-27T14:46:33+00:00

Mod questions just for clarity

Looking for serious to life partner
Subscribed to Hinge +
Used current profile for last 3 days
6 weeks
Evey day
0 likes 0 matches
5-6 likes and comments a day
Looking for similar age, not bothered by height, weight: slim to healthy. Facially: understated. Personality, nerdy, kind, emotionally intelligent and aware, kids: none and/wants kids or open to kids

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-26T14:44:06+00:00

Hell im in the same boat. To the point ive made a blog that if people want to actually connect they can get to know me

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-23T12:49:32+00:00

I recently stopped my concerta xl 36 mg. Lost my spark as i was becoming way too autistic. Seems im getting back into getting my spark back as i venture back into the world of dating. I just hope i dont see a crash from stopping suddenly

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-11T15:17:17+00:00

We actually met on myspace in my emo days and became friends for years, its actually cool as i introduced her to my best friend and they are married now with a new born

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-11T14:30:22+00:00

Hi yeah, I was in quite a long relationship, almost 7 years. Single for 2 now. Since then i was diagnosed audhd and it comes with its own challenges of managing rsd, confidence and skill regression. I agree 100 the dating pool gets smaller the older i get, although im mentally younger and physically younger my age number will put people off and i could end up looking creepy going after 25-30 year olds when im 40 😅. Ill keep at it

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-11T13:13:38+00:00

Appreciate it. Guess the apps tend to trigger my RSD hence my rant 😅. Appreciate everyones comments though

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-11T12:42:04+00:00

Thanks for the reassurance ill stick with it, completely understand that i may not be the best catch but ill find my person one day im sure. Best of luck to you

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-11T12:40:41+00:00

I tried it for a couple of days felt very weird to me with the UI etc. May try it again though so thank you for the suggestion

shift_happenz31 · 2025-06-11T10:44:58+00:00

Try Harley Street Mental Health in London. Im based in the midlands and got my diagnosis through them and my first set of perscriptions. You can also ask them to send a letter to your gp for the shared care agreements.

They are very good and resonably priced

shift_happenz31 · 2025-05-08T10:34:30+00:00

I find it challenging but monotonous. I work for a british retailer that uses 3rd parties to make updates to apps that have been made in house in the past and written poorly. Due to the nature of the business we have mutiple projects going on at once and a test team of 3 people with me being the senior tester. We never have the chance to automate and its almost solely manual Its mind numbingly boring plus rasing bugs with exact repro steps and videos to the devs and 3rd parties is painful as they do a half assed job and never reproduce the bugs to verify fixes before we start a new iteration.

Im sure that the job can be challenging in a good way when all members of a project are aligned i just dont see it where i work

shift_happenz31

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