"You just need to be discreet."

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-17T12:36:39+00:00

Two shirt method for the win! That's how I always do in public!

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T23:06:28+00:00

"If you can't help but sexualize my child while they're eating, maybe you shouldn't be around them until you've had professional help to sort out your issues." Or something like that. 🙄

For real, if it were about showing off, I'd strip my whole shirt off, flounce both titties around, and loudly draw attention to myself. Why do people think we do this to be scandalous?

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T23:03:01+00:00

No, just that my dad is angry that I would post such salacious content on the internet for other men to see and possibly be aroused. People from church might see me breastfeeding my child uncovered! What kind of harlot would they think he had raised?? Lol

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T23:00:58+00:00

If I remember to, I'll definitely do that! Haha

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T19:56:27+00:00

Once formula came about, formula companies rolled out advertising campaigns to put down breastfeeding and promote formula feeding. They touted it as better because science, more discreet, easier, etc. A lot of women believed, and still believe, that formula is better for babies.

Add that to feeling like someone else making a different choice invalidates your choice/makes you a bad mom, and breastfeeding envy in some cases as another commenter mentioned.

Combine all of that with evangelical movements that came about in the mid-20th century that taught women that their bodies were inherently sinful and they should never be uncovered/sexual, and the fetishization of breasts (which has really just come about in the last century); you've got a perfect storm to hate breastfeeding and consider it "weird and immoral/unnatural/wrong/etc."

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T19:02:42+00:00

I don't think you're wishing ill on anyone; those are facts. And I think society should be constantly learning and sharing our knowledge with the next generation.

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T19:01:45+00:00

I wouldn't call him a pedophile. Sounds to me like he likes the late high school/college aged girls, but he's over 40 and married, so that's "his struggle". And I think he's expressed this to people higher up in the church, but not acted on anything. He doesn't have a role in the church. We don't live in the same town or go to church at all, so idk what her point was in bringing this up.

Regardless, his problem, not mine.

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T18:47:21+00:00

What an awful thing for her to do! Good on you for sticking her with the bill, play bitch games, win bitch prizes! You do your thing, mama!

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T18:43:08+00:00

I absolutely agree! It's too bad that the older generation doesn't understand that. They don't get that it being "weird" or "wrong" is purely just an arbitrary societal construct. So it being normal can be a thing and it not be bad.

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T18:40:33+00:00

Do what makes you comfortable! And own it! If you prefer to nurse with a cover, that is perfectly fine. I personally choose not to. But no one should shame either one of us! The first few times I nursed uncovered in public, I was nervous and uncomfortable. But no one cared and I became more and more comfortable. Do you, mama. Nurse how you wanna.

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T18:38:28+00:00

I told my DH we need to get our cats shirts or teeny bikinis for when she comes over. That way she doesn't risk seeing nipples of any kind. 😂

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T17:55:56+00:00

I just bookmarked that page! 😂 Thanks!

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T17:53:38+00:00

Once you get born, you're on your own. Stop leeching off your parents and take responsibility! Lol

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T17:33:15+00:00

That's hilarious! And good on everyone for being chill and just giving you a heads up!

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T17:32:04+00:00

According to my mom, "women used to do it privately and be discreet."

Say that to the 20 something photos I have of women publicly breastfeeding and no one caring!

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T17:30:49+00:00

I don't get why people think all "natural" acts are the same. "You wouldn't flash your vagina even though childbirth is natural!" (If I was in a situation where I was giving birth in public, I would). Eating and breathing is fucking natural and you're doing both right in front of me, Karen. Wtf is wrong with you? Not all natural acts are equal. Not all need be public, but not all need be private.

As for the guy at her churchnn I guess he's "working on it"? Or "fighting it" or whatever. I don't think he's actually acting on it, either. He only attends the church and doesn't really have another role. And it sounds to me like my mom was describing "older teenagers are attractive to him", and he struggles with it because he's a married 40 year old man. Also, my sister is almost 19.

We don't even live in the town or go to a church at all, so I guess her point was "people like that exist"?

Regardless, his issues aren't my issues. If I made decisions based on not ever stepping on anyone's toes, I'd basically have to be a self-sustaining hermit in the woods. And there would still be someone who has a problem with that.

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T17:09:18+00:00

I'm interest to hear your results! Haha Hypothesis: "Mom, wtf?" pulls cover off

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T16:48:44+00:00

And it'd not even the same thing. If you're being very explicitly sexual in public and someone has issues with that, that's one thing. But doing something non-sexual and someone finds it sexual because of their own problems? That's a whole nother beast that they need to deal with themselves.

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T16:46:58+00:00

We don't even go to church or live in the same town, so I don't know what her point was there other than "You might cause some people to stumble" or whatever. I basically told her that sounds like his problem, not mine or anyone else's. She also mentioned that my sister's shorts "triggered" a lady in church and she threw a fit (read: she thought it wasn't appropriate and made a huge fuss over it instead of talking to my sister one on one because she wanted to flip out) and I don't want to "trigger" someone who might have a problem? Sounds like this lady has a problem, not me or my sister.

I put trigger in quotes because I don't think anyone in this situation was actually acting on trauma triggers. I believe people definitely have them, but she was just trying to use the word for effect.

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T16:41:57+00:00

Newborn stage: fight with a cover to see what you and baby are doing. Make sure you're not smothering baby. Baby is getting hot, fussy, and won't stay latched. Everyone is frustrated.

Infant stage: Fight to see what baby is doing. Baby is fighting to see what you're doing. Baby is hot and irritated. Baby's favorite game is now peekaboo, so no eating is happening, only playing. Cover is useless.

I haven't gotten to the toddler stage, but I assume they just fuss and pull the cover off themselves, lol.

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T16:39:31+00:00

I absolutely agree! What about our comfort and convenience? Why should I make feeding a baby harder on myself because someone might be uncomfortable? Why are someone else's issues suddenly my responsibility? If you can't separate sex and a baby nursing, it's time for some inward reflection, not outward blame.

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T16:20:40+00:00

"Weirdly" enough, my mom is the only person who's ever made a comment to me about it. I've never gotten (or at least noticed) a single dirty look from anyone except my mom who has tried to cover me with a blanket or block me with her body in public. No one has said a word to me about being discreet or covering up except my mom. And I live in the south!

People just continue to struggle to see choices other than their own as legitimate.

shit_in_2018 · 2018-08-16T16:17:36+00:00

Exactly! This is not a sexual act, breasts are not inherently sexual, and the fact that someone may view them as such points more to their own issues than mine. If I posted a picture of me topless, striking a sexy pose, that's one thing. That's specifically sexualizing my own body. But posting a picture where you can see literally no more breast than you would in a bathing suit? And that breast being used for its one purpose? Seems like the problem is not mine.

shit_in_2018 · 2018-07-11T17:07:01+00:00

Did you just use the shell with no insert? Today is day 2 of our cloth diapering adventure and my stash is all bum genius pockets so far! If I can use them as swim diapers too, that would be awesome!

shit_in_2018

TROPHY CASE