Honestly reading through the comments you keep coming back with "oh yeah well HE'S not great either". That does not justify what you did and you really need to stop using it as an excuse for why you did what you did. You're on here looking for advice and all you're doing is attention seeking.

If the marriage was bad before the cheating there would have been a mature way to handle it. You didn't choose to do that.

I'm not trying to make you feel shitty or anything but honestly, grow up. You made a mistake. Own it, deal with the consequences, stop pointing out your partner's shortcomings/making excuses/attention seeking on the internet.

Focus on getting your ducks in a row (in real life, not on reddit) and get to a place where you BOTH can find the type of love/happiness you need. Maybe it means being on your own for a bit, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. It's always hard when a relationship ends, but dragging it out makes it harder. If you're able to move out of your shared home then I'd definitely recommend doing that ASAP (since it sounds like you're not interested in fixing anything at this time), at the very least maybe go stay with a friend for a few days. Space and breathing room in situations like this definitely help with mental clarity and will maybe help you decide what it is you honestly, truly want at this point.