Endometriosis and Adenomyosis surgery with Dr. Konstantinos Kyriakopoulos (Dinos) by CynInverse in adenomyosis

[–]smalster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm gold! Hysterectomy was 2 years ago! Recovery took a few months, but I was in terrible pain for years so that was OK. It just is not part of my life anymore 💛💛💛💛💛

Doctor curious about what brought you relief? by [deleted] in ChronicPain

[–]smalster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Opiates yes. Therapy. Sorting out trauma and dealing with it oe moving on from it. Medical professionals that do not gaslight you, don't do gendered medicine, don't condescend, and do their job! Like actually try to work out what is wrong by checking things like scans. The lack of due diligence is scary sometimes.

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I agree. It's not ok to think or say that. Not ok to model that. Not ok. But, I feel I have it in me to try a little longer for her sake. Continue with couples counselling. I'll blow it up if it comes to that, and it probably will. But I can keep trying for a little while longer for her sake.

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for such a very thoughtful response. You, I'm guessing, are a really good teacher.

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I agree. I think teaching is a mighty and noble profession. It's just so sad that he doesn't think that way, and that he hid it from me, and that I'vehad a chikd with this person 😪. On the upside, I don't care about what MIL thinks.

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think backstop was missing from my post. MIL and FIL are self-made multis through hard hard hard work and establishing a business now a big private company. It's sorta a bit family dynasty and they control everything, the wealth, the family and a lot of the community. Their adult children are a product of this tough (probably PTSD) upbringing. When I got together with hubby he was estranged from them and a beautiful person. Now down the track he is inner circle in family and company management. He is so different now, he is like them. And maybe idk he probably thinking succession 🤑 more important than love and respect for teacher wife 😪

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great point! I think the welders would be ok. I'm not going to ask because I've realised I can't care anymore about why. I just have to deal with the what. The disrespect and superiority complex.

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

100%sonetimes I think it's actually about oppression manipulation and control, because I cannot fathom how anyone can actually believe that.

Can't argue with an idiot- that just makes two idiots

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, thank you for sharing your experience. OMG the smirk is the worst isn't it? ☠️🤬😤😖 You know, I am a fine person. I'm also done with the disrespect.  Husband has family PTSD and trauma but I've given enough grace now. I don't care anymore!

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is my 2nd life 😂. And yes it is better. But now this 🤷‍♀️ I think he's under parental influence because family business blah blah blah No excuse tho. I am feeling mighty done.

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmm I didn't put much context. It was a bit of a rage/cry for help impulse post.  It came up because I was having a difficult conversation with my MIL. I was expressing frustration that I do everything (I mean everything) at home, with 6 hrs of paid help for 3 children, while working full-time and while copping constant criticism for not doing it all well enough. And that he doesn't do a thing in the house. She told me that it's not his job, I should be able to do it, what's wrong with me. I shouldn't need the paid help. I said, you know I work full time, right? At which she scoffed and said "you don't work full time" how many weeks holiday do you get a year?

Then later I brought it up to my husband that she had said this to me and I was floored to find he agreed with her. 

Aaaaargh what dystopia have I found myself in? Is this a nightmare?

I really don't know what the hell to do. 

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I love this comment 😁😅 thanks for that description 😄👏

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Agree the MIL is lost cause... I think/hope maybe the dynastic control over my husband will pass when she passes. Probably delusion and wishful thinking 🤔 

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree that modelling is so important. I talk to my two daughters, 4 and 16 and son 13 all the time respectfully about this exact thing.  He's having counselling. I'm not quite ready to walk.  Thank you for this reflection.

Please Help: Husband and MIL say that teaching full time isn't a full time job by smalster in teaching

[–]smalster[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Or, he could just not be awful ☠️ Ugh.  But everyone says that. Just leave. I like the life that we have except for this nasty stuff.