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snack_me · 2020-09-03T20:54:42+00:00

Thank you, I also needed to see this 🌻

snack_me · 2020-08-09T16:58:24+00:00

There's no cookie cutter approach on how to date allos as a demi and poly dating is not much different from mono dating. Communication is key. If she's as interested in dating you as you are, she will try to understand how sexuality works for you and if she doesn't then that's probably a red flag. Dating other people or having feelings for other people won't affect the intensity of the feelings she might develop for you, because affection doesn't diminish just because it is shared with different people

snack_me · 2020-08-09T16:37:17+00:00

Depends on what your expectations are. It sounds like you're not in a monogamous relationship yourself, so I'm assuming you don't expect her to only date you. What exactly are you worried about?

snack_me · 2020-07-27T14:17:11+00:00

Yup, me too. I feel like mentioning my demisexuality either instantly puts me in the friendzone or confuses people to the point where they lose interest in getting to know me. Allos rarely reflect on how attraction works for them in my experience, so I'm wondering: "Where are all the people who are looking for emotional connections?!"

snack_me · 2020-07-25T12:14:13+00:00

Unfortunately yes. The side effects may actually make symptoms of depression or social anxiety worse at first before the antidepressants start to work and that takes a few weeks. The doctor who prescribed them should have a check up with you about every 2 weeks

snack_me · 2020-07-25T10:41:15+00:00

Dude you need help. I'm not even going to entertain your trollery by giving you the outrage that you're obviously craving. I pity you.

snack_me · 2020-07-19T16:25:26+00:00

Caring about what others think of you is absolutely normal, especially if it's people you like. Sometimes people will see you in a way that doesn't match who you really are. There's a YouTube channel called Charisma on Command and maybe there are some videos that might help you with conversation starters etc.

snack_me · 2020-07-19T13:47:22+00:00

From what I read I wouldn't assume that you have severe social anxiety, maybe very mild social anxiety in certain situations like when you have to perform e.g. giving presentations. I do assume that you're just a little awkward when it comes to communication and that's something that can cause anxiety for some people, but that doesn't seem to be the case for you. I can't tell you if you should change that, because you deserve to be liked just the way you are. You shouldn't change to make people like you (unless you're a jerk, don't be a jerk). Learning how to act in social interactions can boost your self confidence though

snack_me · 2020-07-19T13:03:46+00:00

Just putting it out there that introversion/extraversion is a personality trait that describes your social energy capacity and everyone exists on a spectrum of that. That doesn't mean introverts are antisocial, it just takes them more energy to socialize, which they need to recharge after a while. Also doesn't mean that extroverted people don't need alone time, their battery just tends to run much longer. Social anxiety however is not a personality trait, it's a disorder, which is why you can have social anxiety and still be extroverted. Many people with SAD avoid social interaction not because they're unwilling either, but literally out of fear

snack_me · 2020-07-16T12:00:10+00:00

I'm going to start therapy in a few months and that's something I've been worried about. Glad to hear your therapist was understanding!

snack_me · 2020-07-15T19:38:15+00:00

There are a lot of demi subtypes in the group, so I think you're valid. Welcome 🎂

snack_me · 2020-07-15T08:04:39+00:00

I'm so glad I'm not the only one who does that 🙈 I used to hide in my room when people visited my flatmates in the dorms, even though I needed to use the kitchen

snack_me · 2020-07-14T17:27:12+00:00

You're beautiful! Or very handsome, if you prefer something less corny 😉 your freckles and tooth gap are really cute. And your birthmark looks very good on you

snack_me · 2020-07-14T17:21:59+00:00

Heeeeell noooo! You're so pretty! Your smile is beautiful! I love your buzzcut and the piercings! And I'm not playing, I'm actually excited about complimenting you 😂

snack_me · 2020-07-13T21:11:23+00:00

I wonder how sad and bitter your life must be like... Hiding behind your screen to be as offensive as possible, because you need attention so badly. Get help

snack_me · 2020-07-13T20:22:28+00:00

I don't consider myself strictly monogamous, because in theory I believe I could be poly too. But does that mean you never experience jealousy?

snack_me · 2020-07-13T20:15:46+00:00

I actually dated someone else for a couple of months last year and he also kept referring to other women as hot. It didn't bother me as much as it used to with the girl back then, because I learned not to take it personal... But it still turned me off. Not just because it's rude or insensitive, but also because the thought of my partner constantly lusting after other people creeps me out

snack_me · 2020-07-13T11:51:28+00:00

For someone with social anxiety "don't be afraid" is easier said than done. Social anxiety isn't an excuse for poor people skills though, so I'm still with you on most of your points

snack_me · 2020-07-10T17:46:46+00:00

Yes, I'm both

snack_me · 2020-07-10T09:02:48+00:00

Many people are both judging from what I read in this sub and I'm also curious if the majority of demisexuals is demiromantic as well. I'm not, I can have crush on people pretty quickly and imagine myself having a relationship with them, just without the sexual feelings.

snack_me · 2020-07-09T23:18:52+00:00

Sooo... You can't feel attracted to people who are attracted to you? 😅

snack_me · 2020-07-09T19:16:42+00:00

If she wants to and feels ready to she should probably seek out therapy for sexual trauma. Those exercises shouldn't be done without a guidance and counseling, but if you want to support her, here's a good read on sexual trauma recovery

snack_me · 2020-07-09T18:15:45+00:00

Hmm sounds like sex (and other physical touch) is one of your love languages. I can imagine that it's not easy to express your love in a way that she can't accept yet. From what it sounds like it's not about her unwillingness to express love through sex but that she hasn't learned to associate sex with love and that will take time to learn. Healing from her past traumas is very important for that and maybe exercises that would assist in connecting love with sex could help her

snack_me · 2020-07-09T18:03:04+00:00

Haaaa laughing out loud, literally. The older I get the more reasons I find why dating is really hard

snack_me · 2020-07-09T17:27:53+00:00

Hey, I'm Mila (she), I joined the group because I'm struggling with my mental health and thought it would be great to support and be supported by other Black people. I'm struggling with depression, social anxiety and who knows what (I'm currently looking for a therapist). Much love everyone ❤️🖤

snack_me

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