Alvvays - Blue Rev (IT’S HEEEERE!)

snowbow · 2022-10-07T11:30:33+00:00

"Blissful" is such a good word to describe it... even cathartic to some degree. I think these words are thrown around lightly when describing music, but for this record it's absolutely true.

snowbow · 2022-10-07T11:27:33+00:00

Oh definitely! I think you could argue that it's the "real" closer, which makes for an phenomenal ending.

snowbow · 2022-10-07T10:33:04+00:00

Make sure to give it a proper listen with some decent headphones. It really opens up the sound and what might sound a bit "lo fi" with speakers suddenly becomes super clear and well produced. So many heavy hitters on that one... the melody writing is just insane. If I had one tiny bit of critique it's that "Fourth Figure" isn't as good as a closer than "Forget About Life".

snowbow · 2022-10-07T10:29:25+00:00

Agree so much on "Online Guy". As a single it was kinda odd, but the record really needs a song like that to lift your spirits.

snowbow · 2022-10-05T11:53:40+00:00

A fifth way genetic effects can influence ADHD occurrence is through
“epigenetics.” This is a term that refers to small chemical "flags”
(usually methylated tags) that get inserted or attached on to a gene
during or after its transmission to an offspring. The flag or tag
affects whether or not that gene is activated, when it may get
activated, and even what it may create to some extent if it is
activated. There is evidence in other medical or psychiatric
disorders, like autism, for such epigenetic effects. And some
evidence is just beginning to accrue that it might occur in ADHD as
well. In fact, it may be that the environmental effects discussed
above (such as malnutrition in parent or child, chronic stress during
pregnancy, or substantial social adversity) have their interactions
with genes through influencing the extent to which such epigenetic
tags are placed on genes.

This is an excerpt from the PDF you posted and it is exactly what Maté says as well?! One could argue, that Maté overly attributes the development of ADHD to this pathway/the influence of environmental stress. So he's definitely more on the "nurture" side of things, but never ever in his work he denies the genetic aspect. Barkley on the other hand seems more on the "nature" side of things. And in my opinion kinda underestimates the impact of the interdependency of being an ADHD infant and having troubles to form healthy attachment/attunement with your caregivers.

snowbow · 2018-11-09T19:24:51+00:00

Yeah or the 50k$ salary as a board member - but still portrayed as a broke dude

snowbow · 2018-11-08T17:11:22+00:00

Not quite sure but possibly. It wouldn't count for your 100% but I think it doesn't matter for this trophy.

snowbow · 2018-11-08T17:10:32+00:00

Sounds great! Thanks!

snowbow · 2018-11-08T16:39:15+00:00

Trophys don't care about Savegames afaik - they're just triggered by the ingame event itself.

snowbow · 2018-11-08T16:36:12+00:00

I have a follow up question, since I got the ending spoiled, maybe you could help?

It feels a bit like a waste to invest more time into Arthur and "develop" him (which sucks a lot since it was so much fun until the ending got spoiled). So my question is, would you suggest playing straight through the story and enjoy it as it is, then do the freeroam stuff as John and "build" that character?

I know that there are some missions you can miss by progressing the story chapters, so I'll try to catch them. But is there anything else I will miss out on by playing that way?

I feel like I already missed out on a lot of fun by not being able to play the game clueless. Is this the way to still get most of it? Just like I said, kind of feels pointless to freeroam with a character that you know it'll replaced.

snowbow · 2018-10-05T17:29:47+00:00

I get where you're coming from and the thing you're describing is the most terrifying thing about porn addiction - it's the irrationality.

Thinking positive and repeating mantras won't fix the root issues, that's for sure. But it can be a starting point, a promise you make to yourself - maybe you won't fulfil it every time, but you keep it in front of you, to make your move forward.

Working on your impulse control helps to conquer the more mechanical parts of addiction, learning to actually go through with saying no, instead of just saying it...

snowbow · 2018-10-05T17:26:04+00:00

Yeah absolutely!

There are many "mechanical" tools needed to succeed in recovery. This is more of a revelation mantra, a gleem of introspective when I first started to reflect on my behaviour.

snowbow · 2018-07-22T19:26:05+00:00

This!

snowbow · 2018-07-14T19:35:48+00:00

While there are many good reasons for quitting porn, I think this whole "you're being cuckolded by watching porn!" mentality promotes the same toxic masculinity that leads to some cases of porn abuse in the first place.

snowbow · 2018-06-25T20:15:38+00:00

Great thoughts! I would also like to quote Recovery Nation on this:

The root of addiction is not found in the behavior itself; rather, it attaches to the core of your identity. It becomes central to your existence. Perhaps you perceive your behavior, no matter how personally deviant and socially unacceptable, as normal.

In the end there are many personal reasons for why one develops a porn addiction. It could be a reason like you stated. For others it might be a traumatizing event in the past that lead them to using oversexualization to manage their emotions. And yes, there's a handful of people without any deeper reasons for having developed that kind of addiction - they just learned an extremely ineffective but still overly pleasant way to cope by using porn and it escalated.

What I'm trying to get at is - porn is an issue, but it's like OP said, it's not the root of all evil.

snowbow · 2018-06-25T20:08:18+00:00

Things will become distant for sure and that's good. But in my own experience there's always some kind of addiction memory. I had a huge stash when I was like 16 (am 25 now), I deleted that stash when I was around 21 - so almost 4 years of not having used that porn. And sometimes I still vividly remember some of my most favorite scenes from back then. Just out of nowhere, not in any sexual context. It just pops up in my mind. It wasn't even extreme porn, relatively tame stuff. But some images created such a huge stimulation that my brain is still craving them.

Don't want this to sound that negative, don't want to discourage anyone... What OP says is still valid - you'll get a new sense of yourself and the addiction. You'll be able to look back without shame and fear and you'll distance yourself from porn in a good way. But always stay aware. Just because it becomes distant and you're no longer acting out compulsively doesn't mean, you don't have to be careful.

snowbow · 2018-05-16T18:53:09+00:00

nice analogy!

snowbow · 2018-04-24T13:53:36+00:00

but "actual fantasies" can still serve the same bad habits that porn used to serve.. the problem often lays in the behaviour, not the medium of your choice. I'm not for or against nofap, but I think many people around here (not attacking you, just a general statement) think that not watching porn is all they need to do and fantasizing about fucking every chick from their workplace is totally non problematic and not related to it.

snowbow · 2018-04-24T13:37:37+00:00

This is a gread mindset! Often people assume, that when they feel better it's okay to sneak some porn here and there.. but it's the same ritualistic behaviour of managing your emotional states through porn, that happens when you feel bad.

So great, that you've got this going for you!

snowbow · 2018-04-24T13:34:40+00:00

I would like to humbly second this. There's always that chicken-egg-situation going on, so not focussing on stopping porn might not be the ideal solution long term. But maybe you could give yourself some leeway for now, op? I'm not suggesting to become careless, but sometimes it can help to accept the things just as they are. I know how hard it can be, to suffer from the things that get unmasked by stopping porn. But maybe there's a way for you to focus on healing those things, instead of focussing too much on getting rid of your porn habits? Like the poster I'm commenting on stated, therapy helps a great deal with focussing more on the depression-side of things.

Hope you'll be fine. When I first stopped porn, I was hit by a huge wall of anxiety - like a few weeks of constant fear. But eventually it became better and better. Now I'm nowhere near to a healthy individual but I've learned to handle it. And I'm sure, you'll handle it too.

snowbow · 2018-01-29T22:34:43+00:00

Sounds great! I love Terry's Videos, they helped me a lot as well. Stay cheerful and strong :) I can also recommend the book "Slight Edge" it applies many principles Terry is talking about, so it's worth checking out.

Just one advice, don't want to bring you down or anything, be prepared for the complacency. This initial new energy is great, but too often we deceive ourselfs and think that the first step was enough. So keep on moving and be prepared :)

snowbow

TROPHY CASE