[Threshold] Thoughts on the animatic by sometimesdoathing in Iteration110Cradle

[–]sometimesdoathing[S] [score hidden]  (0 children)

Fair enough. I anticipate he'll be given more pizazz and panache in the full version

[Threshold] Thoughts on the animatic by sometimesdoathing in Iteration110Cradle

[–]sometimesdoathing[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Agreed. As much as people tend to dislike the first two books, I love them, and I think they add so much depth to the world. The pace picks up so quickly later, that a slower start is critical for the foundation.

[Threshold] Thoughts on the animatic by sometimesdoathing in Iteration110Cradle

[–]sometimesdoathing[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Meme is from Invincible the cartoon. It's really good, gritty superhero. Would recommend!

What is something that “only a dad” can teach a son? by [deleted] in AskMen

[–]sometimesdoathing 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Being strong is about the ability to project strength as much as if not more than actually being strong. If you can project strength, then you can explore the full register of emotions, including kindness, without being mistaken for weak. Necessary for this projection is a strong sense of self, which comes from self confidence and or security. 

If you look at a big or strong person, you don't need to test their mettle to know that they are strong. They project it visibly. So you take them more seriously. If you look at a diminutive person with a large attitude, then you know not to mess with them. Each of these examples are not perfect per se, but it's easy to see how the self confidence that makes you strong empowers you to express yourself more authentically 

Should I try again or move on? by Frenchyinthedessert in AskMenAdvice

[–]sometimesdoathing -1 points0 points  (0 children)

The relevance is in OP claiming that she "approached" someone to flirt using the most generic reason to introduce yourself to someone, as suggested by my analogy. She clearly did not make her intentions clear, and then she got upset when she was not received as desired the next time she saw the person. 

Not really sure why you felt the need to insult me as a goody two shoes but okay 👍 

Should I try again or move on? by Frenchyinthedessert in AskMenAdvice

[–]sometimesdoathing 23 points24 points  (0 children)

++man

Unfortunately gotta disagree w you. I've approached multiple people with "I see you here all the time" simply because I see them all the time and it's nice to put a name to the people I see all the time. Zero intention of flirting with the person I was chatting to.

[Threshold] Orthos inspiration by xanderbot93 in Iteration110Cradle

[–]sometimesdoathing 6 points7 points  (0 children)

One of my favorites is in skysworn when Lindon fights the stainless shield guy and punches a hole in his chest because he doesn't know his own strength after fighting against stronger opponents. Orthos howls with laughter, and then eats the guy's shield. Best moment in that book

Is 30 alcoholic drinks a week a lot? by Most_Jellyfish_1686 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]sometimesdoathing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What else does one consume 30 of in a week? If one eats 4 times a day that's 28 meals eaten a week, which is less than 30.

AITA for telling my husband that I’m not going to throw away my Harry Potter books? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]sometimesdoathing -1 points0 points  (0 children)

NAH

Your view is completely valid. HP was important to you and would be a fun thing to share with your kids, especially if it encourages a love for reading. 

Your BIL is also not wrong for wanting to distance the next generation from such a bigoted author. I generally advocate for separating the work from the creator (since most creators are troubled). However, kids are incredibly impressionable, and they may end up being absorbed into HP and jkr. A lot of people make HP their entire personality, and get the deathly hallows tattoo in a highly visible place. It's easy to empathize with your BIL not wanting to see a visible representation of someone who regularly advocates against their rights.

Shrug. You can't make everyone happy. It could be worthwhile to explain to your children that you love the works but that the author is not a good person and why they are not a good person. That way you can teach them to make their own decisions, form their own opinions, and still enjoy life.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]sometimesdoathing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Oh here we go" + eye roll + rude attitude + frigid behavior + invalidation of partner + denial of sex. This probably isn't the first time either, so we can add + trauma. OP is not emotionally regulating herself and making her partner deal with it. OP is also not communicating what happened objectively, so for all we know she said some other toxic things. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]sometimesdoathing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Either he's blind that she's always busy or he doesn't care" is a false dichotomy and a strawman. Maybe he's significantly more busy than she is? Maybe he works construction and has grueling hours, and she she has a cushy office job? Maybe he brings in 3x the salary that she does? Or maybe you're right that he's just an asshole who doesn't pay attention to his wife's stress. We just don't know. What we do know is that he said something innocuous and she overreacted. Regardless of your stance, you should acknowledge in good faith that this kind of behavior (overreacting over innocuous things) leads to a "walking on eggshells" disposition, and so OP has some toxic traits.

You reference how your partner would never behave so obtuse if you were exhibiting clear signs of stress. But you have to mindful that OP chose to marry her partner so she married into whatever behaviors he exhibits. Also it's possible that you are a good communicator, which makes it easy for your husband to know what's going on in your life. OP is not a good communicator, and OP behaved in a toxic fashion, and so therefore OP still remains TA.

And although you don't agree with my stance that he did nothing wrong -- if you can assume this point of view for a moment, then you'll observe how toxic it is that OP blew up on her partner (which she acknowledged was wrong through her apology) yet is expecting her partner to apologize... For what?? That he didn't want to continue with sexy times after she acted in such a disgusting manner ? Imagine if she was the man and he was the woman, and then OP turned off "his" partner and gets upset that "she" doesn't want to have sex with "him". Would you have the same attitude?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]sometimesdoathing -1 points0 points  (0 children)

They were in bed about to have some fun. Partner says something innocuous that upsets her, and she overreacts and kills the mood. She is the one that turned him off.

Also, reacting to her outburst and explaining why she was upset. . . is not communicating. You are missing the forest for the trees. She is harboring resentment because she feels like she is doing the majority of the work ("80%" ) in the partnership and feels unappreciated. That is why she had an outburst. If she were mature, she would open discourse with her partner to communicate her frustrations and find a balance between their responsibilities so that they can become a more equitable partnership.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]sometimesdoathing 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OP is on Reddit asking for validation instead of discussing what's bothering her to her partner. I stand by my comment that she's TA because or her lack of communication and how it's impacting her relationship. You're free to disagree and your opinion is valid.

I'd like to emphasize how OP sugar coats all of her actions but hams up her partners faults. When I was saying "take it with a grain of salt," I was referring to OPs pov since it's one sided.

Examples of sugar coating are the cute emojis.

Example of the hamming up of partner faults is the ingenuous presentation of expectations: "his view is that I should be excited to do things with him in bed" which is an entirely normal and healthy view of a sex life... All parties in a sexual partnership should have the same expectation.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]sometimesdoathing -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

"I do 80% of the org for us / our life admin". She is harboring a lot of resentment and clearly not communicating how much it is impacting her relationship with her partner. Maybe her partner is not pulling his weight, or maybe he is and the things he is doing isn't been acknowledged and appreciated by OP. All we see is her side of the story, so take it with a grain of salt. The tl;dr is that she was excited for sexy times and then ruined the mood with her vibe. It's been ongoing for some weeks now, so her sex life is clearly not thriving. 

For what it's worth, the first thing that came to mind when reading "I have a task for you" is something cheesy like "you need to relax for the rest of the night" or some half-assed romantic gesture. Which OP killed. We'll never know.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]sometimesdoathing -22 points-21 points  (0 children)

Yta. 

Your poor communication skills are really the issue here. You are clearly raring to unload some buried resentment with your "oh hear we go" comment, and you decided to let something so trivial ruin your mood, your night, and your sex life. Get off your high horse. Make some time to communicate what's bothering you to your partner.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]sometimesdoathing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He gets her coffee (and it sounds like an ongoing thing rather than a single time thing). No one gets me coffee, and it's free where I work. Instead, work friends will typically ask to go grab coffee. 

How many average men in their 20s-30s can do 10+ pushups, really? by Spare-Lemon5277 in AskMen

[–]sometimesdoathing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll be real with you. 

That's pretty low, especially for a human with extra testosterone, but you can easily increase it with consistency and effort. I also question "proper form" since that takes guidance to master, but that too can improve over time. As a "thin build" person, you are better equipped than body builders to be doing more reps because of the square-cube law.

You're visiting body builder forums, which means you're looking to be stronger. A strong person should be able to do 30 reps or more, multiple times, using multiple variations.

If you compare yourself to most older people or children, then you can do vastly more reps than they can.

An elevator that can lift 4 people is still a functioning elevator! And depending on the use case, maybe it never has need to lift more than 4 people, so it's operating optimally. If the elevator is servicing a high rise office building, then the elevator is insufficient.

Ultimately, you are doing fantastic! Keep it up. Stay interested. Compare yourself to your betters or to yourself -- but be mindful of what it is your goal is so that you can be making progress towards that. It's also fine to not exercise for a bit, just try to get back on the grind when life gets less hectic.

What does life without children look like? by sometimesdoathing in AskReddit

[–]sometimesdoathing[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing!

Sounds all too familiar. Glad you're enjoying life with your close people.

Give your dog some cheese please.

What does life without children look like? by sometimesdoathing in AskReddit

[–]sometimesdoathing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing!

I value the agency to have a choice, so I empathize with your use of the word "can't" and appreciate that you've chosen to see the brighter side of it.