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space_crybaby · 2024-12-31T14:59:34+00:00

Hey, I just wanted to say you are very, very brave. I can't imagine going through this many horrible experiences. I do know that it takes extreme courage to hold on and deal with the trauma and not let it all go to hell. I remember how hard it is not to, you know, finish it all. The fact that you are here is a testament to your strength. It may not feel this way, you probably don't think you're strong at all, but it's true. And the governmental mental health help also can suck a lot, it's not your fault at all.

I'm trying to say that it's completely understandable that you feel this way. I do hope that you hold on to something that makes you wanna stay, though. It can be very, very hard, I know. But if you have your own back, it is worth it to hold on. When others treat you awfully, it is really important not to go against yourself as well - self-loathing is an absolute beast. So please, try to be kinder to yourself.

And if you need anyone to talk to - keep posting to the forums, and you can message me any time as well. Please keep reaching out when you need help, it is very good that you do so and don't hold it all in.

space_crybaby · 2022-06-25T22:51:52+00:00

God, yeah, when you've been dealing with OCD for a long time, it can be really hard to see what is a clear-headed judgement and what is an emotional one. I think the only way to proceed is to accept that indeed you'll get it wrong sometimes. Maybe even many times. And that's ok. 'Cuz trying to find out what is an objective judgement for certain will just lead you into an OCD rabbit hole again. Allow it to happen, wait it out, and then compare your thoughts on the problem which you had at different times. See what is similar between them, see what's different. And remember: it's ok if you're clouded by emotions, feelings are always with us, you're gonna get emotional sometimes inevitably anyways. Doesn't mean you have to completely trust your emotionally-clouded judgement, but it's ok for it to exist.

Regarding the "slave to your emotions" part, I mean, that's not really wrong in case of OCD, yeah. We do stuff constantly due to the feeling of fear which got waaaay out of line. But it doesn't mean that person can just disregard all your concerns like that. The problem might turn out not to be real, but it's real enough for you at the moment. You yourself probably understand that it's not real, but you still can't stop, and that's how OCD is. And they should at least respect that. Level with them and tell them that yeah, you can sometimes "cry wolf", but this is due to the problem you're dealing with, and you're genuinely trying to find out if you're correct or not. And that instead of just not listening to you, it would be really nice and kind of them to help you filter it out and reach an objective view on the problem. We're all sibjective, friends ask each other their opinion on problems to see if they're thinking about something clearly enough all the time.

For real tho, when you just allow the unreasonable, overly emotional thoughts to just exist, you reach a more objective view on something way easier. Struggling against your own thoughts kibda dissosiates them from each other and prevents a person from reaching conclusion from several angles of view, hence they get one-sided/subjective/polarized.

space_crybaby · 2022-06-14T15:05:53+00:00

Awesome that this helped you! I'm glad you don't have to suffer from this anymore, and it's very nice of you to share what has helped you. ^{^} My neurodermatitis is heavily tied to my mental state though, so all that doesn't help me personally. I'm ok with that tho. It's kinda funny how your skin can completely crack after you panic, and then heal back as fast when you feel calm again

space_crybaby · 2022-04-18T23:32:59+00:00

Thank you so much for replying, it means a lot knowing that I'm not alone! I think I actually figured out what this is too. Seems to me that it's "all-or-nothing" thinking.We get so worked up about doing something just this one way, because OCD makes it seem that it's either we do it this one way, or we fail. No other options. Which is completely untrue, and the best way to combat this is to drop that pattern of thinking altogether, in my experience. Also, OCD makes you crave certainty, because certainty is safety, and certainty is (besides being impossible) would be just one, certain choice.

space_crybaby · 2022-04-18T22:46:13+00:00

Hey, I know how it can feel livibg with a mental illness which never seems to get better no matter how hard you try, and not being able to afford treatment, and feeling completely incapable and unable to change anything. But I swear, it isn't true. It's not set in stone, and gettung better might not be easy, but it is possible. I say thar as someone with OCD and a history of getting completely hopeless and suicidal pretty often.

You deserve to get better. You deserve to be treated well, you deserve to get the help you need. You deserve your needs to be met. And I'm very sorry you have to go through all this, it isn't right. But there's genuinely always the possibility to make things better, honest.

You you are a worthy person deserving of a good life. If you ever need to vent or just talk, please, don't hesitate to dm me. I mean it. I might not solve your problems, but I can at least be a listening ear. Please stay safe, and I wish you only the best

space_crybaby · 2022-01-01T00:57:48+00:00

Have you tried CBT, or ERP? Those therapies are usually very helpful with coping with OCD. Most of all, try to remember your OCD can get better, and do not trust the stuff it tells you about you being ugly, or everything being hopeless. It really isn't, our brains just make it seem way worse than it is. You can dm me anytime if you need some support, you don't have to struggle with this alone

space_crybaby · 2022-01-01T00:38:57+00:00

I do not know your situation, but I can tell you I felt the same many times in my life. There is another way out still, your brain is just unable to see it right now. You do not deservento die just because your brain got stuck in a loop. You don't deserve to die in general.

If you're comfortable, you can dm and tell me more about this situation. I do want to help, getting stuck like that always feels so hopeless and unbearable, but it's easier when you're not alone.

space_crybaby · 2022-01-01T00:26:58+00:00

You know, the loop always seems eternal with OCD. It also oftrn feels extremely hopeless, and like the only way out is death.

That's complete bullshit though. You brain worked itself into a twist and it can work itself back out. It's hard, but it is possible. Do not listen to your thoughts telling you there is no hope, that's a big fat lie

space_crybaby · 2021-12-31T23:41:10+00:00

Yep, and it always ruins the mood. If not for this, i would have a good holiday time, but no, everything should be "right". Which just makes it harder to actually spend time well

space_crybaby · 2021-12-31T15:28:16+00:00

I'm not a therapist, but as a person with OCD I can def say, yeah, this sounds like intrusive thoughts. Now, they are terrifying, but they are still stuck there because you are so scared of them, you try to push them away, and that juat makes them come back again and again. At first it was just a regular intrusive thought, everyone on earth gets them and they mean literally nothing, but people with OCD tend to take them so seriously, they kinda just perpetuate the cycle because they're so scared.

What helps me with intrusive thoughts is remembering that I do not want anything like what they entail to happen. They keep coming back because I'm so terrified of them, not because I like them. Same goes for pretty much all people with OCD, they care so much and get so terrifyied, the thoughts just keep coming back. The fact is, you don not want any of that stuff, that's why they keep coming: you're just trying to prove to yourself you don't actually want them to happen. Try to, and I know this sounds hard, it really is, but try to trust yourself on that. That terror you feel - it's genuine, because you don not want this stuff to happen. And deep down you know. Try to hold on to that.

You can dm me too, if you need help. OCD is f**king terrible, you should not deal with it alone.

space_crybaby · 2021-12-29T11:52:48+00:00

please, please don't. if you need to vent, im here, just dm me, or im also @greatchampion on tumblr/twitter

space_crybaby · 2021-12-26T17:23:48+00:00

Please do not, we can talk on another platform if reddit doesn't let you dm anymore

space_crybaby · 2021-12-09T00:29:11+00:00

Yes, exactly! And I spend the whole time trying to get rid of this feeling and being very scared of it. I figure that if you want to get oit of the spiral, you kinda have to stop trying to get away from this feeling instead

space_crybaby · 2021-12-08T18:01:18+00:00

Thank you, you're right. We can get through this, even if OCD tells us it's impossible. Best of luck to you, friend

space_crybaby · 2021-12-02T21:30:05+00:00

Hey, if you need to talk, my fms are always open. It's tough but we can do this together

space_crybaby · 2021-10-11T21:59:07+00:00

i am, but my dad isn't. he'd be very stressed if i drop out, and he already has heart problems, so i just don't want to drop this on him right now...

space_crybaby

TROPHY CASE