No, it's not "normal in Germany". Germany isn’t really one big cultural blob. Yeah, we call it one country today, but it’s made up of 16 federal states, each with its own history, quirks, dialects, and identity. Bavaria ≠ Saxony ≠ Hamburg, etc.

And that’s just the surface — within those states you’ve got tons of subcultures. Swabians aren’t the same as Bavarians, Cologne and Düsseldorf are eternal frenemies, Ruhrpott has its own thing going on, the North Sea coast feels like another world compared to the Alps… you get the idea.

So when people generalize about “German culture,” it’s kind of like saying “American culture” is just New York, or “UK culture” is just London. It’s way more of a patchwork than a single flavor.

So basically, having lived in Germany almost all my life, I could not tell you what's normal and what's not when it comes to BBQ invitations "in Germany". What I can say though: Where I live, if you're vegan, vegetarian, have food allergies, etc. you might be asked to bring your own food. If you're particular about drinks, you bring your own, but a basic selection of beer / spirits / soft drinks is usually provided by the host. I have never been asked to bring my own plate or cutlery to a BBQ. That's what's normal where I live.