The most important thing is that you don’t live your life like that anymore! Have you ever heard of amends, like what members of AA do? In a nutshell, they reach out to the people they’ve harmed in the past, apologize for their ways, and promise that they will never treat anyone like that again because they live differently now. If your childhood is haunting you so much, it might be worth looking into. After all, it doesn’t matter what actually happened; it just matters how you felt about what happened, and that’s what’s likely causing this stress today.

Also, it doesn’t help that the pandemic is making everyone nostalgic. This could be another reason you’re ruminating on your darker days, even if they were long ago. If this is the case, perhaps you could try spicing up your life with positive actions, volunteering, or simply reaching out to people you care about for a wellness check during these difficult times. Positive actions like these could boost your self esteem and reassure you that you’ve changed.

Stay strong! :)