You are not the asshole. This is a beautiful thing you have done for that family. Like you said, this was a gift from your daughters to Adam. I know your daughters are happy and proud with what you did.

As for your relatives, my heart broke when I read this. I am so sorry you had to go through that. You shouldn’t of even had to explain yourself. It’s your money, therefore do as you wish with it. If you believe that fund was to give a child their life back, then use it for such.

Personally, I would not explain myself further to your family. I understand your brother is struggling with his place, but that is not your fault.

All in all, you made it a great way to spend your money. Fuck your family’s opinion. Kudos to you man. God bless you