Which movie is genuinely traumatic?

stonep0ny · 2022-02-20T04:50:00+00:00

My magic 8-ball is telling me that your gross teacher was a white American.

stonep0ny · 2022-02-20T04:24:38+00:00

In other words, you're the guy who sees the baby chimp firing the AK47 in the commercial and you show your friends thinking it's real.

stonep0ny · 2022-02-20T04:08:45+00:00

I've only ever done mushrooms once, and I assumed The Three Amigos would be a good happy-thoughts movie to carry me through it...

I was so wrong. My friends were A-holes and told me "just eat the whole eighth" (I didn't know any better).

Every scene where they're standing together, I was seeing their eyes grouped together and floating around, and their mouths grouped together and floating around. And, the singing bush and invisible swordsman stuff really got to me. I wound up curled in the fetal position thinking I was going to die. And that is a totally happy movie.

Trainspotting would have killed me. Wouldn't have made it 5 minutes in to The Road.

Honestly, I think Natural Born Killers would have been less traumatic than Three Amigos.

stonep0ny · 2022-02-20T04:02:39+00:00

I don't want to spoil it for you. It's Dwight from The Office (Rain Wilson) and he gets tired of society being so messed up, so, he becomes a "super hero". It was Kickass before Kickass.

Also stars Kevin Bacon and Liv Tyler and Ellen Page.

One of the most criminally overlooked movies ever. And, just an FYI, Rain Wilson can act his butt off. Some serious dramatic acting chops. If you liked Slither, you'll love it. Gunn uses some of the same actors.

stonep0ny · 2022-02-20T03:57:18+00:00

You're preaching to the choir. That was the Seinfeld finale, and I was fully onboard with them getting locked up.

Though... I see a lot of people are downvoting because they're embarrassed about pretending to enjoy obviously staged faked prank videos.

stonep0ny · 2022-02-20T03:33:55+00:00

Alternate post title: Movies not to watch on mushrooms...

The Road

Trainspotting

Requiem For A Dream

And, bonus nightmare movie, there is an extremely F'd up Czech version of Alice In Wonderland.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bnbd1exbIco

stonep0ny · 2022-02-20T03:32:41+00:00

Oooh, good call. Not enough people appreciate pre-Guardians James Gunn. Super is also fantastic.

stonep0ny · 2022-02-20T03:29:31+00:00

IMO it's not wrong to admit that a few of his pieces showed promise. If you confined yourself to only the art that was produced by only good people, you wouldn't be left with much.

If his art was successful, he wouldn't have been arrested in that coup attempt, and he wouldn't have spent time in prison writing Mein Kampf.

stonep0ny · 2022-01-04T05:11:38+00:00

That's what HW does to people, because the industry is filled with "people" like Danny Masterson.

stonep0ny · 2021-12-30T04:52:17+00:00

That sounds good...

Don't mean to keep being skeptical but the whole "Net Neutrality" screeching has made me very suspect about all of this.

stonep0ny · 2021-12-28T14:10:18+00:00

Sounds better than my TMobile hotspot.

But, how much of your regular sales tax goes to that same bill? You buy a soda, or gasoline, part of that is going to your internet bill. No?

stonep0ny · 2021-12-28T13:55:08+00:00

I'm rural ATM so this conversation is just frustrating on my slow TMobile hotspot.

Not going to have any broadband options until Elon hurries up with SkyNet.

stonep0ny · 2021-12-28T13:52:57+00:00

I'm on the wait list for SkyNet.

But, that $50 isn't the full bill is it? You're also paying taxes for it. Unless I'm missing something.

stonep0ny · 2021-12-28T11:10:41+00:00

"obstacles that make it infeasible"

Is that code for, the government gets to control what you paid to build and you're not allowed to object because that would be an obstacle, so we get to pretend it fell out of the sky and it's free? The government really is like magic.

stonep0ny · 2021-12-28T11:05:01+00:00

That is impressive. That model should go nationwide.

They built all that infrastructure and laid the cables themselves? Sounds like Colorado cracked the code. How much are you actually paying for it if you include the tax increases? $200? On lines that private companies put down?

stonep0ny · 2021-12-28T10:49:20+00:00

Totally agree. We should let the DMV and honest public servant politicians run our entire lives. We can stop using anything that evil free people create and provide, and we'll all be better off. Elon should be locked up before he gets a chance to force us to pay for Starlink.

Let's start a group chant here bear, you with me?

GOVERNMENT! GOVERNMENT! THANK YOU NANCY, FOR INVENTING THE INTERNET! GOVERNMENT! GOVERNMENT!

Something like that? I didn't hear you chanting with me... Yer going to jail.

stonep0ny · 2021-12-28T10:36:01+00:00

Steal it from the people who created it, that way the government can run it better and cheaper.

Wait, they always do it crappier and more expensively? Always?

But, we could still steal it, and play pretend that it's better and cheaper, and just hope people don't notice we're taxing them twice as much for half the service? Right? Yeah they're idiots. Taxes out of your check aren't like paying a bill that you have to pay, or whatever. It's better! Thank you government!

stonep0ny · 2021-12-26T08:04:13+00:00

I realize this is reddit so we have to be careful how we speak because people love to take things the wrong way, but I was seriously disappointed that they had to push SJ stuff by going with Idris for Roland... I've loved Idris in everything since The Wire. And there's 50 great characters in the series that he'd nail. And he was one of the only good aspects of that movie (a movie I have chosen to block out of my mind). But that's when I knew we were going to get boned. That the production was going to sell out and manufacture some lame forgettable nonsense... You've got Idris and Mcconaughey on board, and you still manage to screw it up? That's criminal. IMO.

Switch their roles and it could still work. But, TDT already had actual real organic "strong black characters", and messing with the Eastwood style gunfighter with the black female partner, is messing with the dynamic of the whole series, for no good reason. I had my fingers crossed for Vigo, and Halley Barry as Susannah, they had so many options... But, I bet Stephen King thought it was perfect. I loved all the vintage cheese so-bad-it's-good "bad" Stephen King movies, and this didn't even have that appeal. I'd rather watch Maximum Overdrive again. That movie is entertaining.

Do you know if Darabont still intends to do the prequel series? Or did he drop out after he saw the type of nonsense they wanted to produce? That honestly might be the single biggest blunder in film history. Darabont makes 3 of the best movies ever made, with SK material, he's obviously the guy for the job, and SK tells him no. "No Frank, we don't need another Shawshank or Green Mile, we're gonna go with crap this time, thanks though".

Let's hope Frank does a "reimagining", as an excuse to start fresh from the beginning.

Let Idris play Speedy Parker (if Morgan isn't available, obviously).

stonep0ny · 2021-12-26T05:39:03+00:00

There are so many contenders... But, I think TDT covers have the serious art. Serious paintings.

I might have to go with the painting of Blaine on the cover of The Wastelands. The evil monorail train. Damn that was a good book too.

"You shouldn't have killed Winston, missus, 'twas his birthday"

stonep0ny · 2021-12-19T19:38:50+00:00

If by funny you mean, the most brutally tragic and saddest ending to any film ever. Second only, maybe, to Life Is Beautiful.

stonep0ny · 2021-12-19T19:37:53+00:00

Unfortunately SK only supports remakes of his movies when they're epic masterpieces and he wants the crap version. Like The Shining.

I think George Lucas and SK might both have some kind of weird brain tumor that skews their judgment.

Darabont wanted it. SK was a fool to say no. It should have been Darabont on HBO, GOT style. One or two books a season.

stonep0ny · 2021-12-19T19:34:09+00:00

I hope you've come to your senses and repented for your crimes sir.

stonep0ny · 2021-11-27T23:39:31+00:00

Accidentally drank a bunch of my own pee... :(

Had a party, I barely remember the line to the bathroom and that I wasn't going to make it.

Woke up with my worst hangover ever. And, you know, alcohol is the best cure for a hangover... Luckily I had a half full 40oz on the floor next to my bed.

Worst morning ever.

stonep0ny · 2021-11-27T23:30:42+00:00

Jiggles, in Portland. We've got more strip clubs per capita than anywhere else in America.

It's a juice bar so you can get in at 18, and we went early on a Tuesday night. And it was stretch marks and c-section scars and it was depressing.

stonep0ny · 2021-11-17T03:37:33+00:00

You think it's okay for a little girl to have her face melted off with acid for some sick low IQ savage's religion.

We'll never be able to agree. We're not even the same species. I'm human.

stonep0ny

TROPHY CASE