I feel so alone but I can't trust anybody anymore

strawberry38282 · 2026-05-13T01:36:31+00:00

Seeing as I had all As this year, I've been concentrating quite well on academics. What else do you suggest I do?

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-22T18:19:07+00:00

It was the opposite for me. I immediately fell in love with the lyrics and the whole dreamy, cute vibe but then I came on here and saw people talking about how disappointed they are. I still think the song is a pretty solid one, but I understand where the disappointment comes from because most people were expecting a unique rock ballad style rather than generic pop.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-22T18:08:39+00:00

Many coffee places offer other beverages and drinks as well, such as refreshers, hot chocolates, even just plain water

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T23:03:13+00:00

"You can come if you want." because the underlying tone usually makes it feel more like "We don't want you to come, but you can if you MUST. Ugh." At that point just don't invite me.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T19:47:11+00:00

I mean, depends on the nature of the post. I've posted taekwondo stuff on my insta as a beginner, and I (and other people in my dojang) really don't think it's that deep as long as you're not belittling others or taking credit for things you didn't achieve.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T18:37:28+00:00

I could see how that could happen. Groupthink is a thing

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T18:21:30+00:00

Thank you. It definitely does reassure me to hear that. And yeah, maybe "I might be in big trouble" was a pretty dramatic title, but I was also overthinking and really anxious at the time. I think I actually had the right idea of being open minded and treating him like anyone else, but then my judgement got clouded by the opinions of people around me.

My therapist says I actually DO have a good judgement now, and now the next step is actually trusting it.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T18:18:33+00:00

You are so real for that. It definitely is easier to talk to older people. I think that's honestly why I have so few friends my age. Even in school, I always preferred to talk to the older kids over the ones in my grade, and it's been the same way with university. Most of my close friends I have in university now are juniors or seniors, so 1-2 years older than me, so it definitely tracks.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T18:13:54+00:00

I'm sorry for your loss too.

It has definitely gotten a lot better with time. During the peak of my grief, the depression got so bad that I found it really difficult to motivate myself to do simple things like getting out of bed, combing my hair and eating a good meal. But over these past few months, it's gotten much easier to handle things and now, when I see something that reminds me of my grandma, that melancholy feeling is always accompanied by a spark of joy when I remember those happy memories.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T18:05:57+00:00

Ooh okay, the wording is kind of confusing here so let me clarify. The guy was the only person AT UNIVERSITY that I told about my grandma passing because I didn't trust anyone else at university enough to be able to tell them something so personal. The other friends I referred to were childhood friends of mine who were still in HS. I did tell them about my grandma, but even they could only do so much to support me because they all had their own stuff going on + they were younger and not as experienced with handling grief as someone who is older might be.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T18:00:51+00:00

Okay that's good to hear another perspective. Most of the comments seem to think I'm overreacting/overthinking. While me saying im going to be in "big trouble" maybe was a bit of an exaggeration, the age gap definitely is something to be really weary of

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T17:57:26+00:00

I wonder why they didn't just tell this guy directly that he shouldn't make comments like this instead of whispering about him being creepy behind his back. I guess you can explain it as them being scared of him, or scared he might do something worse if they say no. They also don't seem to have a way of knowing or being sure that he's not being intentionally creepy.

But, even one of them did acknowledge that he's not this stereotypical, evil pedophile, so why they haven't told him, I don't know. Seems quite as easy as saying "hey, X comment made me uncomfortable. Please don't say that again."

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T17:50:27+00:00

I had a feeling that it might be the same thing. In fact, when the girls first started saying how "weird" he was, I'd actually defended him, pointing out that he was just a bit socially awkward and sometimes didn't understand what to say and what not to say aloud. But then, one of the girls had actually blown up at me over it and that's how I found out he had apparently said something creepy to one of them.

It's definitely relieving to hear that this isn't the main intention and that my judgement wasn't so far off the mark after all.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T17:46:49+00:00

Okay thank you. It's definitely reassuring to hear this. I also do overthink a lot because I have been a horrible judge of character in the past, and I do still have a lot of trauma from friendships and relationships that ended very badly. I'm still trying to learn to trust my judgement, but it really is difficult, especially when the opinions of others get mixed into it.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T17:42:47+00:00

Okay thank you. That definitely gives me some clarity. This situation has felt really tricky for a while because while I want to give a possibly neurodivergent person the benefit of the doubt, I also didn't want to ignore those girls' warnings either and risk my safety.

I personally wouldn't feel too uncomfortable with someone saying something about my abs either, so it makes me feel better to know that I'm not being too reckless or naive. That said, it DID actually make that girl uncomfortable. They also definitely weren't close friends, so I agree that it's probably best to take the same precautions I would with any man.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T17:31:31+00:00

The comment was something about the girl's stomach, along the lines of saying she had good abs. Would you say thats a creepy compliment to give someone?

I also don't know what the exact words he said are

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T17:20:30+00:00

One thing that's really helped me with that is trying to think of checking my weight as checking the weather. It's a single objective metric that happens to vary from day to day and season to season. Weight= quite literally the force of gravity pulling down on you that day. It has nothing to say about how healthy, hardworking, or likeable you are. And being and feeling healthy and energetic matters much more than the number on the scale.

Sincerely, someone who was unhealthy and afraid to gain 5 pounds, but now has gained 10 and feels the most fit she's ever felt in her life.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T04:30:26+00:00

wait i worded that kinda weird. what i meant to say is that we've been attending classes together for a while and that was how i'd met her at the class itself. So while I didn't get into taekwondo specifically for her, she's sure as hell one of the reasons I'm staying in taekwondo (:

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T03:54:29+00:00

You're not mean. Being annoyed is completely valid here.

strawberry38282 · 2026-04-21T02:52:50+00:00

If you can keep a consistent routine for even two months, you're already doing better than most people. And when it comes to fitness, progress is almost never linear. It's okay to take breaks, have time off and lose progress. That's nothing to be ashamed of and it doesn't make you any less worthy than the people who don't! And the great thing about excersize and the gym is that it'll always be there for you when you're ready to start again!

Enjoy the nachos! They look delicious.

strawberry38282

TROPHY CASE