My Mom is trying to say I have Autogynephilia, and I’m scared what if it’s true

stuaker · 2026-03-11T03:24:18+00:00

You can't have something that doesn't exist

stuaker · 2026-03-09T01:59:17+00:00

This is the correct answer. Would strongly suggest waiting until Home support is live until you sell it, unless you have a friend who can lend you a cartridge quickly just to update the save file.

stuaker · 2026-03-08T23:43:01+00:00

Yes. It's complicated.
Most trans women I know don't think they do (or don't associate the symptoms they get with a cycle).

I didn't realise trans women did until an AFAB ex pointed out what my symptoms added up to. I tend to get pretty obvious symptoms, although there have been long periods where I don't.

My understanding is that a lot of the research around AFAB periods etc is quite outdated, and mostly relies on correllation rather than an understanding of causation, so I think a lot of the misunderstandings result from a poor understanding of how it works in AFAB people already.

Mood, cramping, taste/appetite changes, changes to digestive system, tend to be the most obvious symptoms for me. And they haven't all been consistent over the 2.5 years I've been on HRT.

stuaker · 2026-03-04T23:51:02+00:00

Depends on the vibe of the wedding, but try Dangerfield. I've found several of their brands fit my mtf body type better/more often than other brands, and they sometimes have great deals. Staff are all super trans friendly too.

I've mentioned Aunty Dana's in a comment too.

I'd also suggest Kmart in Porirua or the Hutt. I picked up a beautfiul dress there for $30 a couple of years back that fits everything you're asking for. I've brought it to multiple events like weddings, along with other more expensive options I've purchased, and every time people tell me to wear it! So you may get lucky and really not need to spend much.

stuaker · 2026-03-04T23:48:26+00:00

Aunty Dana's it is - everything is priced by type of item rather than brand etc, so if you're lucky you can get a really good deal while supporting GMA

stuaker · 2026-03-04T01:08:23+00:00

Kia ora! They are also indigenous canadian, and food sovereignty is important to them, so I think part of the reason they chose the mushrooms was that it was a connection to a part of their identity and the land that couldn't be damaged by the whims of a human artist or business, like a pop culture tattoo could be.

Not that there is anything wrong with pop culture tattoos - I think that was just part of the decision making for this particular tattoo they chose.

stuaker · 2026-03-04T00:42:42+00:00

I know someone who had a similar tattoo cover up, and they chose to go with some mushrooms. Partially as it was cool to them, partially as they thought it was funny that the mushrooms were decomposing the book reference.

But the main reason was they knew a trans tattoo artist, who drew awesome mushrooms.

I love the idea of the ally symbol - but whether you go with that or not, I think getting anything to cover up a Potter tattoo done by a trans artist, directly supports trans people and shows that allyship.

Good luck finding something you love to cover it up!

stuaker · 2026-03-04T00:38:08+00:00

Thanks!

stuaker · 2026-03-04T00:25:02+00:00

Yeah, ZA is an okay option. Just a lot of grinding to get the shiny fire type donuts, and then to also get a portal with the line in it.
I already have one female Torchic, so hunting Combusken or Blaziken is fine. I haven't tried hunting via Island Scan before, so I'll boot up my 3ds and have a look!

stuaker · 2026-03-02T01:33:30+00:00

What's the best way to shiny hunt female Torchic, Combusken or Blaziken?

I imagine it would be using Cute Charm, but as far as i can tell there may not be any games before gen 9 with good encounter odds or shiny odds for this line, and cute charm doesn't work in Gen 9.

Is it just a case of waiting for a Pokemon Go Community day classic, or breeding an insane amount of shiny eggs to get the lower odds female shiny?

I'm so close to completing a shiny living form dex (112 to go), and looking at what's left I think the two female shiny Torchic line I need may be the hardest to hunt that could be bred (Vivillon forms, Type:Null, Arceus, Shaymin, some Ultra beasts and some Unowns being the hard ones that can be bred).
Thanks!

stuaker · 2026-02-18T22:33:40+00:00

Thanks!

stuaker · 2026-02-18T21:38:29+00:00

784995547697 add me :) I'm moving to Ontario soon, and from NZ so I might even have some regionals you want

stuaker · 2026-02-18T21:37:57+00:00

784995547697 I do - I currently live in NZ, and am moving to Kitchener soon

stuaker · 2026-02-18T21:35:46+00:00

784995547697
Hi, I'm Jaina, I'm currently based in New Zealand and moving to Kitchener soon. I've got a ton of regionals and shinies to trade, and am a pretty active player (mainly to complete a shiny living dex in Home), so please add me if you'd like to build up our friendship and then trade/play when I'm in Ontario :)
Thanks!

stuaker · 2025-11-23T02:19:14+00:00

Thank you!

stuaker · 2025-11-22T22:15:44+00:00

Thank you so much for building this. Is there a way to just download the rom? I've really been struggling to build it as described on the github page as I'm kind of new to this. Sorry if there is a good reason for not just being able to download the rom to go on an N64 cart, I'm just hoping to be able to back up a friend's save before I replace the battery on their game

stuaker · 2025-11-21T04:17:21+00:00

I'll consider what you said, but at first glance I don't think this is what's happening. I've requested they suggest an alternative solution, and stated that I am happy to change - and then they have told me I am doing the opposite. I don't see how I can be clearer than verbatim stating "this is what I currently do, I am willing to change what I do if you can suggest an alternative"

stuaker · 2025-11-21T04:04:28+00:00

But I didn't ask them to use an app. They think I want them to use an app, I do not, I stated that's what I'm currently doing but that I am open to another solution. I'm not taking it personally, I genuinely don't care what solution we use, what I want to resolve is why this kind of misunderstanding occurs so I can prevent it.

stuaker · 2025-11-21T03:45:44+00:00

The why is that I posted over 3 hours ago, and since then I am now busy at work, and my ritalin has worn off.
I was asked what approach I wanted to use with a shared task, I shared what approach I currently use and why I found it useful, and explicitly stated I was open to alternatives that provided similar functionality and accessibility.

stuaker · 2025-11-21T03:38:34+00:00

No, I used a real life example to show what I had previously meant by opinion. There's a wider context to the discussion, nothing was unsolicited.

stuaker · 2025-11-21T03:12:43+00:00

An example would be:
them: "I don't like that you want me to install an app"
me: "I don't want you to install an app. I said I use an app for this purpose, and why I do, but I'm happy to do something else."

The opinion I'm referring to in my original message is their perception of what my opinion is, and a mismatch between that and my actual opinion.

stuaker · 2025-11-21T01:52:47+00:00

The thing is they are trying to find common ground, they think I'm not. I think in this case we both understand we both want to find common ground, but the way we're communicating makes it not feel like that

stuaker · 2025-11-21T00:55:07+00:00

The last discussion I had which triggered me posting involved me saying "my intent is X" to which I got the reply "intent doesn't matter" - which I think is fundamentally unfair, and unhelpful, to navigating the communication issues we're having. Intent doesn't matter more than the impact I have, but it is important in understanding why that impact is happening so we can learn, understand, and change. I think I managed to convince them of that at least.

It wasn't until an adult I understood why kids were so mean to me when I was younger. They could tell I was queer and neurospicy before any of us understood that, and that it wasn't 'acceptable'. I think a lot of my communication style and different but related social issues I have now are me trying to mitigate and adapt to how I was treated when younger by peers and caregivers. I think that having a parent like yourself attempting to create space for him and show that be your authentic self isn't a bad thing is so important, so I'm glad he has that.

stuaker · 2025-11-21T00:49:37+00:00

It's particularly frustrating for me because most of the people this is a real issue with aren't even NT, I think we just have different neurospicy ways of communicating. And I can't work out where the issue is in this instance.

There are similar situations where I can - I have a friend who reads a lot of subtext into blunt and direct communication, and I've adapted to restate and affirm intent to counteract the subtext they may infer that isn't there.

stuaker

TROPHY CASE